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PG: The stress is getting to me (vent)

jennigator3jennigator3
in Preemies

I don't know who else to vent to, I thought your ladies would understand. I really think the stress of this pregnancy is starting to hit a breaking point. This morning I couldn't feel the baby when I woke up as I always do so I freaked out and told my DH something was terribly wrong. I tried to take a shower but ended up getting hysterical and throwing up. Once I calmed down I laid on the bed and she started kicking, so she's fine.

I don't normally act this way but I feel like I am unraveling. All I think of is high BP, the NICU, and danger to the baby. Sorry to unload this on you, but anyone else will think I'm nuts. I feel better now but I don't know how I am going to last 8 more weeks as a total basket case!  I haven't had any growth U/S since my big one at 20 weeks so I am thinking of begging for one at my next appointment just to make me feel better, is that wrong? I just want to see her.

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Re: PG: The stress is getting to me (vent)

  • kcswifeykcswifey
    Absolutely not wrong!  Your doctor should agree to anything that is going to help your BP stay down!  You are doing a great job mama, hang in there!
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  • SWMcFarlandSWMcFarland member

    I think everything you are experiencing is completely normal and warranted.  It is hard not to freak out about every thing, especially based on past experience.

    I want to point out a few really good things.  1st, you are having a girl!  Yay!!  2nd, you've been through the NICU rollercoaster and survived the ride.  It was extremely bumpy, lots of loops and some straight downs, but remember the end of it, discharge day, when the coaster came to a stop?  You got off the ride and walked out the door with your beautiful baby in tow.  That experience can only make you stronger and more prepared for what the future may hold. 

    If this baby decides she must be born early, unfortunately you can't stop her from making her grand enterence.  But armed with the knowledge you already have from your son's experience, you will be able to get through it.

    However, I really feel confident that once you hit your stride after the magical 33 week mark, you will be fine.  I am sure you are experiencing a lot of anxiety leading up to that number.  Again, completely normal. 

    Regardless, this is so tough but I just know you are going to come through it with flying colors.  You are a wonderful mama who just wants the best for her babies, and that is all you can give.  Keep up the good work!

    3/22/09 - Lily Grace, born at 33 weeks, 2 days
    9/12/14 - M/C @ 7 weeks, 1 day (ectopic)

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  • msalinardi@live.commsalinardi@live.com
    Ask for a referral to a MFM. I can defeiently understand the stress of being pregnant after having a preemie. I remember freaking out because I hadn't felt the baby kick for a while and I made my DH get me packed and ready to drive me to the hospital. Well as soon as we hit the highway the baby started kicking up a storm. You will do great. If you are worried about your blood pressure, I would invest in a home blood pressure monitor, this way you can watch over it at home. Good luck!
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  • Denise2005Denise2005

    maybe you could rent one of those dopplers so even if you don't feel the baby kick b/c he/she is sleeping then you could listen for the heartbeat and not stress out. 

    sorry i know next pregnancy i'm going to be a huge mess too. 

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  • ShanaNChrisShanaNChris member
    If I wasn't being seen like once a week (literally I am at either my Ob's office or my hematologist once a week). I would feel nervous too. Why are they not treating you as high risk?
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  • SWMcFarlandSWMcFarland member

    The doppler is a good idea.  I rented one from bellybeats.com and it was the best thing I could have done for myself.

    I paid 45 dollars a month but it also gave me the digital number heartrate.  I would highly recommend it, just for peace of mind.

    3/22/09 - Lily Grace, born at 33 weeks, 2 days
    9/12/14 - M/C @ 7 weeks, 1 day (ectopic)

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  • sleepyoceansleepyocean member
    I know exactly how you feel!  I have been a basketcase for weeks and weeks now.  I'm worried about my BP going up, it's been slowly climbing the whole pregnancy but my doctor isn't worried about it, waiting 4 weeks between appointments is killing me I'm worried all the time about high BP and protein or just about anything happening to the baby.  I was so carefree last pregnancy and it all went south fast, this time I'm a stress case, I know stressing isn't going to help anything but I can't help but worry almost all the time.  I can't offer you any words of wisdom that'll help you, because I know nothing really helps me.  I can only tell you that you're not alone!
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  • jennigator3jennigator3

    Thanks ladies for letting me vent, I have good days and bad days, but since hitting the 3rd trimester, the stress has been pretty awful. I am being seen by and MFM and I see my OB for NSTs weekly, so I am being watched just fine, it doesn't do anything to help though. No matter how many times he tells me things look great, I can't help but think of things taking a nosedive. I haven't needed an U/S because of how stable things have been, but I will ask for one, it would make me feel better.

    Thanks again!

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