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TTC after 35
anxiety
I just wanted to share my worry with wonderful people who will surely put my brain back on track. Let me preface this post with the fact that I read way too many blogs, and so many have been heavy with bad things lately. It all got to me, and now my stomach is churning with the fact that I am no longer a young un. I am consumed with fear over the genetic viability and soundness of the few eggs I have left. I am fraught with worry over all the what ifs. Most of those what ifs I have read about on blogs recently. Yes, I know...stop reading those things. I just wonder if anyone else here is overly concerned or has the same fears that I do? Am I just experiencing hormone induced panic?
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Re: anxiety
I have a general anxiety disorder so almost anything can consume me with fear. The "what ifs" will destroy you if you let them. I can't tell you you have nothing to worry about or your concerns are silly. Because frankly, who knows? I have a friend who went through full-blown menopause at 32. Another friend that went through it at 41 and my mom is almost 60 and hasn't gone through it yet. None of us knows how much time we have to have a family but I am glad I waited.
It may be taking me a little longer than it would have at 25, but I am going to be so much better of a mom now that I am ready to give my whole being to another. That didn't happen until about 34. Late bloomer I guess. For me personally, I know that if I had had a child before 30 my marriage likely wouldn't have survived and I wouldn't have had the patience to be the best mom I could be. I would rather take a chance on needing help to have a child or not be able to have one at all than bring a child into a home that isn't ready for it.
Advice, take a breath. Assume you are healthy until a doctor tells you different. If you want my little calm my brain down trick...I sing Three Little Birds by Bob Marley to myself when I am in a panic about something. "Don't worry about a thing. Cause every little thing is gonna be alright."
When we were TTC the first time, everything i read gave me anxiety and I was constantly looking for 'signs' to pick up on and self diagnose. once we got pg with ivf#1 i managed to stop reading all the negative stuff and just forced myself to concentrate on the joy of being pg and getting ready for baby.
now that i'm pg again this time was a lot diffferent. we were so busy with DD that i didn't have time to get back into reading lots of ttc stuff and we thankfully got pg naturally after 3 mos. of trying on our own and 1 failed ivf. We did have a few early tests where i got stressed because they told me some levels were 'slightly high' but i quickly got myself to stop fretting about that too. Just do the best you can to keep yourself in check. I think everyone goes through this, so it's totally normal. good luck.
I think about this a lot. You really can't worry about it but i know it's hard not to. I feel like this whole process is out of my control now and my fate is in the hands of the RE. I remember the days that just me and the OPK held the control, or so I thought.
Good luck, I'm hoping that your anxiety is soon voided by a BFP.
Sheesh! Now I am starting to get anxious! And I AM on meds for anxiety! I have this constant worry ALL the time, every month, you name it. I keep thinking that I am playing Russian Roulette with the idea of getting pregnant at my age. I have these thoughts that God is going to give me baby and there will be tragically something very wrong with it because I am 44 and should not even be thinking of having another baby at my age. It scares the beejeebies out of me. I keep those thoughts at bay by telling myself that my husband is a gazzillion years younger than I am and that his healthy, young, sperm will take care of my rusty, dusty old eggs! (I have to self-talk to keep myself from spinning out of control)!! So I am right there with you ladies. I can't even imagine the added worry of going through all those procedures as well. You women inspire me every day!
Lisa