Question about IF and pets..

ccbanana · April 2010

So, my H and I adopted a little puppy (not so little anymore!) back in February from our local animal shelter. It was after my m/c and I was just needing a pick-me-up. She's seriously the highlight of my day these days.

Anyway, we had family over a couple of weekends ago and my MIL and SIL witnessed DH and I talking to the dog... He referred to her as "the baby." I saw both of them raise their eyebrows at each other and then I felt extremely self concious. I hadn't even given it a second thought but after that I had to wonder if we call her that b/c we are IF? Is it weird that we call her that? We say it in a silly voice, not really thinking she's our baby.

But, DH also talks to the dog and when he does he refers to me as "mom." Now I'm wondering if we aren't just a sad, pathetic IF couple Or do most people do that, IF or not?

Thoughts please And don't worry about hurting my feelings, I've got thick skin.

madelyn07 · April 2010

Kenzie, our first dog has always been and will always be our "baby girl". And we got her long before we knew about our IF.

lyse2143 · April 2010

Hey CC! We have had 2 dogs for a few years now. We call them our kids, as do most of the people we know. DH refers to me as mommy, and me to him as daddy. They are our kids until we actually have some. This was all before we even started TTC so I think this is what some couples do, and it isn't tied to IF at all.

maddie789 · April 2010

If you are pathetic for that, then I'll join the club. My dogs are my babies, IF or not!

MrsP71506 · April 2010

We got Higgins before our IF struggles (the same month we started TTC) and he is our baby and we refer to each other as mom and dad when we talk about him or to him.

I will say things to Higgins like "did daddy feed you?"

so don't worry I think it is totally normal!

oh and when the three of us are snuggling on the couch together watching tv, DH always says we are a perfect little family

deputysgirl · April 2010

Oh puh-lease!! Do not feel bad!!! My DH and I acted just like that waaaaay before we even thought about having kids. We each had a dog when we met, and have added to our family over the years. (currently, only 3 dogs; but we had 5 at one point). They are most certainly our 'kiddos' and we refer to each other as Mom and Dad.

Yes, we know, they are dogs and not real kids. And we've been warned that it will all change once we do have kids, but I can't imagine not considering them part of the family!

So, I think you guys are super cool to love your puppy that much!!!

lmc5004 · April 2010

when i talk about my dogs to other people i call them "the kids". I will say "Im gonna go home and let the kids out of their cages for a while" (I didnt realize how bad that sounded till i just typed it hahahahahahha).

MontyMrs · April 2010

I have 3 babies and they're all cats! In fact, I put them in strollers and wheel them around the neighborhood on nice days :-). No, really - just because you adore your furbaby doesn't make you the crazy IF couple. Screw your family who gave you the raised eyebrows and made you feel bad.

nikinikinine · April 2010

we call our lab our daughter all the time. People need to not give you the side-eye for that. Pets in our home are like family. Clearly we know she's not a child, but she is our baby.

Totally normal.

damabo80 · April 2010

Nope. I've seen people with 5 IRL kids who refer to their dogs/cats as babies, or as the brothers/sisters of their LOs. I've also seen people who don't want kids refer to their pets in such a way "Daddy's got your rope!". I've also seen IF people refer to their pets as just that...pets.

Don't worry, it doesn't brand you as "an IF couple"... it just brands you as a "kooky pet owner" Wink

Head over to Petco....you'll realize you are far from alone on the "kooky pet owner" boat You may even see me over there, the proud momma of a pretty kitty!

krissyh21 · April 2010

Funny, a friend and I were talking about this last night. She does not have IF and has to cats she considers her children.

My mom who is a bunny when it comes to conceiving, calls her 2 dogs her babies. I call my dog my first baby, H calls me her mom, he is her dad and I call her Dillon's dogster (sister). My sister calls her dog her baby as well.

I don't think it is weird, I think a lot of people get attached to their pets. There is a love there, you are their caretaker and IMO, it is perfectly normal.

Keep on loving that little girl of yours and don't be ashamed of it!!!

ccbanana · April 2010

OK I am feeling MUCH better!!! I haven't had a dog before so I just wasn't sure.

MontyMrs, LMAO!

MrsP71506 · April 2010

MontyMrs:
I have 3 babies and they're all cats! In fact, I put them in strollers and wheel them around the neighborhood on nice days :-).

one of my friends does the same thing!! She actually made a calendar this past year called Jake and the City (a play on Sex and the City) and it is pictures of him all around Chicago and some even in his stroller. I find it cute, others may think it is strange

ginger67 · April 2010

My BF is constantly texting me pictures of the dogs when Im not home. He calls them Daddy's little girl's and of course Im Mama. When his parents come over they look at me like Im crazy when I talk to them and they cant believe the dogs are allowed to lounge on the couch. they sleep with us too, and their both German Shepherds! So, no, I dont think your nuts!

Sunshine05 · April 2010

If that makes you pathetic, I'm right there with you! My cats are my baby girls... and we are Mommy and Daddy to them.

MontyMrs · April 2010

Mrs.P7/15/06:
MontyMrs:
I have 3 babies and they're all cats! In fact, I put them in strollers and wheel them around the neighborhood on nice days :-).
one of my friends does the same thing!! She actually made a calendar this past year called Jake and the City (a play on Sex and the City) and it is pictures of him all around Chicago and some even in his stroller. I find it cute, others may think it is strange

LOL- I don't actually do it but it's DH big joke that the cats are gonna end up in baby strollers. I'll admit that DH does take one outside with him on a leash. Total cuteness. That calendar sounds so cute and funny.

Bella2u07 · April 2010

Our 3 dogs are our children until we have some of our own and we are one big happy family. We have always called them our children way before IF. Dh is daddy, I am mommy...even my parents are in on it, calling them their grandchildren, grandsons & granddaughter too.

gidge · April 2010

We refer to eachother as mom and dad, too. I'm pretty sure that started before we were TTC. We also refer to one of our cats and our dog as "the baby". Not sure when that started.

I'd like to think that it's normal and not an IF thing...

Dragonfly1226 · April 2010

We do this.

jdeats12 · April 2010

UHHHH, if this type of thing means that you're a sad, pathetic IF couple, then DH and I are right there with you. We talk to our dog ALL THE TIME. We even talk "through" our dog to eachother sometimes. We refer to ourselves and mom and dad when talking with or through the dog.

Now, in writing this...it seems that maybe we are a BIT pathetic/obsessed. Embarrassed

LnR70707 · April 2010

Um, I refer to myself as "Mommy" when I'm talking to the pets. DH is Daddy. I thought that was normal pet lover behavior. We did it long before we were dealing with IF.

DaniGirl0517 · April 2010

My animals have always been my babies. Even when I was a kid I called them my babies, despite species and I've had quite a few. My dog is especially since she goes absolutely everywhere with me, I'm mom and my DH is dad. When we do get pregnant we're getting her a shirt that says "Big Sister." My family is that way though, our animals are our babies and we acknowledge each other's animals as such.

njohnson1972 · April 2010

Don't feel weird. Fertiles call the pets baby too.

SweetieD21 · April 2010

Our dog is def our baby girl, we love her to pieces. She was our baby long before IF was diagnosed. And, I'm mommy and DH is daddy Big Smile

jdeats71 · April 2010

Wrigley is our baby - IF or not!

FabulousMrs.P · April 2010

We refer to her as our "baby girl" and to each other as "mom" and "dad". We've done this since before we were diagnosed with IF. So, I guess I am in the club, too!

wiscgirl95 · April 2010

You're not weird. Well, not any weirder than me and my DH!!

Even before we were dealing IF or even trying to get pregnant, Mac was always my "little baby kitty". Even though Mac is 10 years old and as DH points out at 18lbs, there is "nothing little about Mac".

Both DH and I refer to each other when we "talk" to the cats as "momma" and "poppa".

baloneydisc · April 2010

I don't think it has anything to do with IF. Our pets have always been our babies, even before we even decided we wanted kids. I got a kitten when I was 5-yrs old & he was my baby. I think it's about the love we feel for our pets, not about what else might be going on inside of us.

Strunella · April 2010

My cat is totally my baby...and when we get a puppy, he'll be our baby too. We'd never get raised eyebrows from any of our family members since we both come from crazy animal-loving families with pets who send cards and receive and give gifts. And this cat is spoiled...'cause nothing is too good for my baby!!

Susan&Courtney · April 2010

I've had my dog since college and she has always been our baby or even our 'doghter' as we like to say. We also refer to each other as mom and dad to her. We've done this way before we were even thinking about TTC.

JackieMac824 · April 2010

No I refer to our cat as my baby - and I refer to us as his mom and dad - I think it is totally normal - IF or not - we did this before we even found out about IF.

jennim1984 · April 2010

Our lab Maggie is our baby and DH says I'm her Mom, and when he gets home from work I tell the dog your "dad's" home! Even after we have a baby our dog will always be our first "child" and is such a huge part of our family. You are not sad or pathetic sweetie, you're just a huge dog lover!

Scigrlnyc · April 2010

Hi!

People I know with pets AND children do this all the time. I refer to my SIL's dog as my furry nephew (he acts like a little guy, so why not).

I wouldn't worry about it.

cara-n-steve · April 2010

We do that too. We call eachother mommy and daddy to the dogs. I think many people do that, even if they have no IF problems. Our dogs are our babies!

cara-n-steve · April 2010

And my parents are grandma and papa. I even send my mother mothers day cards from them..LOL...she loves it!

BMWwife · April 2010

madelyn07:

Kenzie, our first dog has always been and will always be our "baby girl". And we got her long before we knew about our IF.

This!! My 3 1/2 yr old dog doesnt know who Dena and Brian are but she sure loves her Mommy and Daddy.

BMWwife · April 2010

madelyn07:

Kenzie, our first dog has always been and will always be our "baby girl". And we got her long before we knew about our IF.

This!! My 3 1/2 yr old dog doesnt know who Dena and Brian are but she sure loves her Mommy and Daddy.

SmilingMrsF · April 2010

I got my first dog about a year before we started trying and we've always referred to him as "our baby." In fact, it was so bad after the first year we had him, that if I even said the word "baby" he would come to me thinking I was calling his name. Stick out tongue

albjag · April 2010

I'd say you're an animal lover- I call my dogs baby- and we call ourselves mommy and daddy. Ok, well MH calls me mommy to the dogs- I don't know if I've ever heard him say he's daddy. But he'll tell them 'go ask mommy out, or go lay by mommy"

It's not weird. I'd say whoever gave you the side eye for saying that is weird. Or not an animal owner.

Don't feel self conscious.

Pretty much everyone I know who is an animal lover refers to their pets in some term of endearment- and refers to them as a family member-

ETA: I've always done this- even before I wanted kids! And anyone who thinks it's weird can go sit in their lonely dog-less house while I go home and am greeted by my babies who make me smile every day!

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