- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
Preemies
So frustrated and hurt!!
Ugh! I'm having a hard time dealing with some of the nurses at my son's NICU right now! Sometimes when I'm in with my son, there will be another baby crying for oh...15-30 minutes before the nurse does anything and it really makes me wonder if that's what happens to my son when I'm not there?? Is that normal for nurses?? It really hurts me to hold my baby and hear someone else's baby cry like that for so long. There are now 4 babies in my son's area and I'm really scared to go home tonight because I'm afraid he will be ignored. A lot of the nurses are great, but sometimes there are some that are either just mean and surly and put out to have to do anything. I had to ask the nurse tonight twice to help me gavage feed my son because she just "kept forgetting" we were there waiting. Sometimes I just give up and take his temp or get as much of his tube stuff together myself because I get tired of waiting. It just doesn't feel right and I'm really worried.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: So frustrated and hurt!!
you have every right to be concerned! i would take down the names of the "neglectful nurses" and turn them in to the neo or the charge nurse/nurse manager with the dates/times and incidents. depending on how the nicu operates, someone will be in charge... also, if they have a survey system i would name them by name with what is going on.
it's normal to feel worried and upset anyway, and adding to that the worry of understaffing.... sheesh. do they have 4 babies:1 nurse?
i would also request a primary nurse if you have that option (and even if you don't). this was a HUGE help to us, because we got to pick a nurse that we liked, she had dd every time she worked, and was tracking her progress and treatments etc. i would also talk to some of the nurses you have a rapport with... see what they say... they likely have a good knowledge of their co-workers, and can see what's going on as well. in addition, i would make a list of all the nurses that are "approved" to have your ds. we had what we called "team wren" and we were "those parents" that caused all sorts of stink about who had our daughter. but for the most part all the nurses liked us (i became good friends with several) and we got along great. there were a few that were incompetent, or would argue with me (we were also very involved in decisions about our dd.) and we weren't going to tolerate that.
i will say, there were some times that babies were scheduled to eat at the same time, and it was really hard for the newer/inexperienced nurses to keep track- even the experts sometimes- accidentally got babies with the same care times. (the scheduler should have staggered them and assigned the babeis accordingly.) so sometimes things like that happen... but even if one nurse is tied up with cares for one baby, one of the others should step in and help her out.
2 thoughts - I don't know if either will work in your case ... but may be worth a try:
1) see about the possibility of having a "primary" nurse for the day and night shifts. We didn't do this, but I sometimes wished we had. Some NICUs allow parents to request a specific nurse that they like and are comfortable with and designate them to be the nurse for that child for all shifts they work - one for day and one for night. You'll still hve a couple days a week with some other nurse, but at least you'll have most f the time with one you trust.
2) talk to the charge nurse about your concerns - especially if they are with specific nurses and are things you've observed repeatedly. You can also request that specific nurses NOT be put on your child's rotation of nurses. We did do this. There was one nurse who I just couldn't deal with. She rubbed me the wrong way and made decisions that I didn't agree with for my child. I actually had to have another nurse step in and help me take care of DD one day in a crisis situation because the nurse I'm talking about was ignoring the situation. Grrrr. I still get mad thinking about that one.
That was what I hated most about my time away from the NICU. I spent so much time there that I KNEW what happened some of the time. I hope that you find some nurses that you do like and trust soon!
Good luck!