update on RE appt yesterday......

jdeats71 · April 2010

I didn't update last night because I was totally brain-dead and needed a break from thinking/talking/bumping about IF/TTC.

The RE appt went pretty good.....we actually met with the office manager first to discuss the financial portion. So depressing......

We can go directly through our clinic or there is a company called Attain that we can go through that would allow us to pay a certain amount and get 2 fresh and 2 frozen cycles at a discounted rate. Going through Attain would give us more than one shot but definitely costs more. going directly through our clinic give us one shot (unless we want to pay the full amount each time). Its a bit confusing and complicated so I won't go into the details but now DH is freaking out about the reality of the potential costs.

On the upside (if there is an upside) - the RE didn't think our next step absolutely needs to be IVF. She would be fine with us doing 1 to 2 more IUIs and then moving to IVF. Since I did get pg with an IUI, she feels like we are really close. I think we would only do one more IUI and then move on. But I really don't know what to do.

DH and I ended up arguing after the appointment. he can't get past the costs and no guarantee and we really need to get on the same page.

No decisions at this point but I am hoping and praying that we get lucky and get pg this month with no assistance! oh I can dream......

sorry - this was way longer than I thought!

mkoelker · April 2010

I'm so sorry about the issue with the cost. I can't imagine how frustrating that must be. Hopefully you and DH can get on the same page with all of this. You guys are in my T&P's

kmount · April 2010

Sorry about the disagreeing and hope you two come together on a decision soon. In the meantime, fingers crossed for you for a natural BFP!

surfergirlkona · April 2010

((hugs)) I am glad that you have an action plan, but I totally understand how stressful this is. Lets hope that these next two IUI cycles do the trick (or even better this cycle on your own!). I am really, really sorry about you and DH's arguments. As you know, we are going through the same thing. Money seems to be the cause of it, nothing else. I have given my husband a few days to let it all sink in, maybe that is what yours needs too. It is scary, this whole process is scary - but we have to remind ourselves that the end result is worth every tear, pain, and dollar. ((hugs)) It looks like you and I are going to be going through the same thing together.

rjl07 · April 2010

I'm glad that you can try another IUI and give yourself some time to figure out the IVF stuff. I hope it works and you don't even have to worry about IVF at all. Good luck!

HugginAngel · April 2010

I'm sorry hon I hope it all goes well with an IUI or natural so tahty you don't even have to go down the IVF road. :::HUGZ:::

jcath · April 2010

I hate that money issues are so tied up in this. I'm sorry you and DH had a fight about it...but I think that's probably a pretty normal reaction to the situation.

jdeats71 · April 2010

surfergirlkona:
((hugs)) I am glad that you have an action plan, but I totally understand how stressful this is. Lets hope that these next two IUI cycles do the trick (or even better this cycle on your own!). I am really, really sorry about you and DH's arguments. As you know, we are going through the same thing. Money seems to be the cause of it, nothing else. I have given my husband a few days to let it all sink in, maybe that is what yours needs too. It is scary, this whole process is scary - but we have to remind ourselves that the end result is worth every tear, pain, and dollar. ((hugs)) It looks like you and I are going to be going through the same thing together.

ugh - this sucks and I'm sorry we are in the same boat! Same age, same name.....freaky!

DH definitely needs a little time to process the whole situation. Talking about it immediately after the appt was probably not the best call. I think he thought we were going to have it all figured out on the drive home.

the RE suggested taking the next couple of weeks to talk through everything and then make a decision which is good advice.

surfergirlkona · April 2010

jdeats71:
surfergirlkona:
((hugs)) I am glad that you have an action plan, but I totally understand how stressful this is. Lets hope that these next two IUI cycles do the trick (or even better this cycle on your own!). I am really, really sorry about you and DH's arguments. As you know, we are going through the same thing. Money seems to be the cause of it, nothing else. I have given my husband a few days to let it all sink in, maybe that is what yours needs too. It is scary, this whole process is scary - but we have to remind ourselves that the end result is worth every tear, pain, and dollar. ((hugs)) It looks like you and I are going to be going through the same thing together.
ugh - this sucks and I'm sorry we are in the same boat! Same age, same name.....freaky!
DH definitely needs a little time to process the whole situation. Talking about it immediately after the appt was probably not the best call. I think he thought we were going to have it all figured out on the drive home.
the RE suggested taking the next couple of weeks to talk through everything and then make a decision which is good advice.

I hear the tune of the Twilight Zone

KristysRedBarn · April 2010

I'm sorry. I hope you guys can figure out what will work best for both of you.

OscarQ · April 2010

I'm glad that you may be able to do another IUI and sorry about the costs and the argument.

My DH is the same way - I start talking through a situation - really just talking, not looking to come up with the answer right away and he gets overwhelmed or frustrated that we don't arrive at a conclusion. Now I try to give him the facts, do my own soul searching privately, make up my mind and present him with my solution. 90% of the time he agrees with my approach. But the remaining 10% of the time he's at least in a better place to process the information and we're usually able to sort things out without arguing.

In my experience men and women simply process information differently.

I hope you get your BFP this month.

celestej619 · April 2010

(((hugs))) I'll be keeping you guys in my thoughts and prayers.

611bride05 · April 2010

I dont have any advice, I just wanted to wish you luck- I hope you and your DH can agree on a treatment plan.

mdm2137 · April 2010

I'm really sorry you're having to make these decisions. It just isn't fair. I hope you can DH can get it worked out. ((hugs))

Olive44 · April 2010

I'm sorry you are even having to think about that. I really hope you get pregnant on your own or that the IUIs do the trick! That is such a tough decision.

jdeats71 · April 2010

surfergirlkona:
jdeats71:

surfergirlkona:
((hugs)) I am glad that you have an action plan, but I totally understand how stressful this is. Lets hope that these next two IUI cycles do the trick (or even better this cycle on your own!). I am really, really sorry about you and DH's arguments. As you know, we are going through the same thing. Money seems to be the cause of it, nothing else. I have given my husband a few days to let it all sink in, maybe that is what yours needs too. It is scary, this whole process is scary - but we have to remind ourselves that the end result is worth every tear, pain, and dollar. ((hugs)) It looks like you and I are going to be going through the same thing together.

ugh - this sucks and I'm sorry we are in the same boat! Same age, same name.....freaky!

DH definitely needs a little time to process the whole situation. Talking about it immediately after the appt was probably not the best call. I think he thought we were going to have it all figured out on the drive home.

the RE suggested taking the next couple of weeks to talk through everything and then make a decision which is good advice.

I hear the tune of the Twilight Zone

Wait! I think I hear it too!

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update on RE appt yesterday......

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