Any moms travel for work?

MissLMS · April 2010

There is a possibility of a job change for me. But, it would require national travel... between 10 to 30 percent of the time.

I'm excited about the position because it would be a step up for me and would be a significant raise. But, at the same time, I currently have a job that I love, a job that is flexible that allows me to be at home with DD most of the day on Mondays and allows me to basically make my own schedule when I need to.

I like to travel but the thought of being away from dd for work up to 30 percent of the month makes me want to cry.

Any advice?

If you travel for work, how do you handle it with being a mom?

DarthBaby · April 2010

I just accepted a new job where the travel is "up to 25%" and I will have DD and twins! So I have no advice yet. For me, the most I will travel will be a couple days to a week every 2-3 months. So that was an okay amount of time for my husband and I to take the job. I guess I would weigh the pros and cons of both jobs against each other to see where they come out.

Banana44 · April 2010

Everyone is different, so my experiences might not be the same as what you will feel.

I used to travel 75-95% (before baby) - the travel got annoying, but I made the best of it (lots of hotel and airport bars). 3 years ago I switched to a job with 25% or less travel - still not a big deal. I would miss Dh, but the homecomings were great.

Since baby, I have had to travel 2x, both only for 1 night each. It was horrible. I cried on the plane - the whole week before my anxiety was through the roof and I missed my baby dearly. If my work tells me I need to go somewhere for a week - either my DH and baby will come with, or I will quit. I know I can't do it! Now, this is just me - I'm an older Mom, I EBF(until 1 - now I do not pump) , bed share and I'm pretty close to AP (but not truly - I bed share more out of a desire to sleep than the bonding), so if I were younger and baby slept well without me, I might feel differently.

Go away for a weekend and see how you feel. 10-30% is not an overwhelming amount and its just an estimate - you could end up traveling much less.

crzygirl · April 2010

I have traveled for work for the last 8 years. At one point it was at min. 60% travel. Which meant I was not at home Mon - Wed night every week.

Having DD has changed my schedule. I am now working at home full time and only travel when I absolutely have to do so for a customer. Its about 10% - 30% now and varies based on need.

I have a full time live in nanny from Sunday to Friday. I could not managae without her. She is amazing and love my DD.

Also with my husband not available now, I have my MIL come spend the nights at the house when I am gone. She is a huge help. I don't feel like it is acceptable to leave DD without a parent figure and nanny at night if I am gone.

MrsJinNH · April 2010

I'm currently in a job that only requires me to travel one or two weeks per year and I have a hard time with those weeks, but my DH works from home, so he is with DS the whole time and we don't usually have to make any special childcare arrangements. So really, it's not that bad for them, just me.

My last job required 6-8 trips of 2-4 days each per year and for me that was a lot. I didn't have a child then and I still hated being away from home that much.

To me 30% a month sounds like a ton of time, but I guess it would really depend what type of money we're talking about.

I would probably stick with the current flexible job, because that flexibility is worth a lot to me. That's my plan anyway, I currently have a flexible, WAH job that pays well and plan to stick with that until I'm done having babies. I could make more in an outside role for sure, but I think we'd have to be talking about at least a 50% pay increase for it to be worth it for me.

Good luck! It is a tough choice.

LTGirl · April 2010

I travel for about a week at a time every 2 or 3 months. It's doable, but I do find it hard. The anxiety and anticipation is always worse than the actual time away, when I am busy working and I know that C is well-looked after (my mom and husband split it between them). But I couldn't handle 30% of the time - that would be too much disruption for me and for C. And my husband's job doesn't allow that much flexibility and he works long hours. I think there's a petty significant difference between 10% of the the time and 30%.

doctor girlfriend · April 2010

LTGirl:
The anxiety and anticipation is always worse than the actual time away

i feel exactly this way! on average, i travel every 2-3 months, and i'm usually away for about 2-3 nights at a time. leading up to my trips, i absolutely DREAD them - i feel all kinds of anxiety and make all kinds of preparations (prepare & label meals, lay out clothes, etc.) to ensure that all will go smoothly while i'm away. and my heart aches knowing that i have to be away from my little guy. but once i'm actually traveling, i really love the time away. it gives me a nice break (and a chance to sleep past 6am, usually), and it's so nice to come home when you've been missed.

i have felt bad that my dh doesn't get the same opportunity, but oh well!

hope this helps.

smiling76 · April 2010

doctor girlfriend:

LTGirl:
The anxiety and anticipation is always worse than the actual time away

i feel exactly this way! on average, i travel every 2-3 months, and i'm usually away for about 2-3 nights at a time. leading up to my trips, i absolutely DREAD them - i feel all kinds of anxiety and make all kinds of preparations (prepare & label meals, lay out clothes, etc.) to ensure that all will go smoothly while i'm away. and my heart aches knowing that i have to be away from my little guy. but once i'm actually traveling, i really love the time away. it gives me a nice break (and a chance to sleep past 6am, usually), and it's so nice to come home when you've been missed.

i have felt bad that my dh doesn't get the same opportunity, but oh well!

hope this helps.

Same here! The anxiety is worse than the travel. What I would do is discuss this with them--say that you are very excited for the opportunity and would like to discuss what they hope to achieve, etc and what the travel schedule really looks like. I mean, is 25% 1 week a month? Do you travel a day at a time? Things like that.

I used to travel for a few days at a time--quite a lot--but now I just do one overnight maybe one time a month, if that. The first time was hard, the second time wasn't too bad--and now I'm kind of used to it.

Luckiest13 · April 2010

Funny, I just had a similar opportunity. It was a much more interesting job and the travel was less than 30% (don't know how much extactly. it was a few times a year). I was tempted to take it but ultimately decided not to. I really cant stand the thought of being away from DD - even for a few days each year. I'm actually turning down the oppt today!

liz606 · April 2010

I travel anywhere from 2 days to 8 days (in May and Nov) per month. I schedule it around my schedule FIRST, and then my clients second (not that they know I am doing this .

My DH, my MIL, and my parents (they live here in the summer) are a great help to me. If my DH has to work late, I will drop off DD at my MIL's to stay for the day, and then DH can just go there after work (plus he gets free dinner . Or, if I'm getting home late, my parents will pick up DD at daycare, and stay with her until I get home.

I don't mind it at all, and it is something that I have to do and am compensated very well to do, so for me, there is no reason to get upset. It is what it is. I am the breadwinner so there aren't other options.

I talk to my DD when I'm on the road, my DH will send me pictures on my phone, and whoever is caring for her (DH, my parents, my MIL) always calls me to give me an update on how she's doing, what she ate, her naps, etc., so I am never out of the loop as to what she is doing.

I also don't mind a day or two during the month as I get a little downtime just for myself, along with a good dinner and wine. It is pretty awesome to come home and have her so excited to see me!

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