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North Carolina Babies
MrsHughesNC
member
Straying from your original "plan"...
MrsHughesNC
member
Do you ever find that your thoughts stray from your original plan about kids--how many you want, especially? There was a time I actually wanted 3 kids (although DH only wanted 2, so that's what we agreed upon). But lately, I find myself thinking about not having anymore than just Holly. I really think I'll change my mind and still want another, but I'm surprised with myself that I'm even thinking about it, considering in the past, I'd never have even considered an only child.
Holly's a good and relatively easy baby, I had an easy pregnancy, and although I ended up with a c/s, recovery from that was a breeze. So it's not like I've been traumatized somehow. hehe. I just don't feel incomplete without another kid (right now anyway). A friend of mine told me how she felt her family was still incomplete when she brought home her 2nd, so she knew she still wanted a third.. I never felt anything like that at all. I do find myself thinking about how I want another one, because I miss the baby stage, and because I want to reuse all of Holly's stuff. But are those really good reasons to have another child? :-)
I'm sure baby fever will set in soon enough, and I'll laugh that I was even thinking about this. I think some of it is that we decided to not even discuss it, like at all, until I had a full time job. Now I do, so we can, but we really haven't. Maybe I just talked myself into the idea, in case my job thing took too long to straighten out? But I've just really surprised myself lately (it's been for several months that I've thought this way), that I'm thinking I'd be ok not to have another one.
I'm not expecting anyone to make this big life decision for me...hehe. Just wondered if anyone else has surprised themselves with a change of heart from their original plans.
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Re: Straying from your original "plan"...
There was a looooooooooong time where I wasn't sure I'd ever be ready for a 2nd (and we had always planned on at least 2) and then one day it just hit like a ton of bricks. And I mean, it wasn't like "Hmmm...Another baby sounds like a good idea." it was "I'm making an appt for tomorrow to have my IUD taken out and we're getting it on!" It really was that abrupt of a decision (for me).
I really could go either way from my plan. I've always wanted 2 or 3 kids. I love our current family situation and would be 100% happy without having any other children. I definitely want another one, but if life didn't grant us that I would be okay. On the other hand, I think I might even get to the point where I want more than 3.
My sister has 4 and I really love the idea of a big family.
I guess I'm just totally indecisive!
We did not go into our marriage with any plan at all. We both knew that we wanted at least 1 child, but we didn't have a set number that we wanted. We had agreed that we might be happy to have just 1 child. DH is pretty sure that he doesn't want more than 2. I definitely want to have another child and I want to see how I feel after that. I don't want to say that I do not want more than 2 or more than 3. I can't imagine how we'd afford 3 or 4 children though! LOL
It's surprising to me that I want to have more children, b/c I was convinced for Nate's first year that I was done with one. At first it was because I found the newborn stage so difficult, but then it was because I couldn't imagine wanting another baby after DS. Everything felt so right with just him and I hated the idea of having to share my attention with another child.
I don't think there is anything wrong with enjoying your child for as long as you want before you think about TTC another. And there's definitely nothing wrong with only having 1 child if you feel like your family is complete.
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Our original plan was for 2, but right now we're leaning toward having just 1. I feel relatively complete with 1, and DH right now does not want another. My main feeling of regret over not having a 2nd would be for Liam not having any siblings growing up, but for myself I could be fine with 1.
Anyway, unless DH gets a new job with better health insurance in the next year, it will become a moot point because right now we don't have maternity coverage, and I don't want to TTC after I'm 35 (and I will be 34 this year). So we'll see how it plays out!
Hughes, I think we should get pregnant at the same time again and have our babies 1 day apart. Then we could like, take those cute hospital pictures again.
LOL! I'd be willing to bet we couldn't pull that off again!