James' birth: Induction due to BP turned c-section

On June 1st, DH and I went in for our 38 week appt. I had planned to ask the doctor about induction, since my swelling had gotten so bad. The nurse took my blood pressure and didn't say anything, but DH said it looked high. The doctor came in, asked how I was feeling, and then told me I was going to L&D to be induced. My BP had skyrocketed to 162/95. The doc asked if I wanted to just opt for a c-section, but I wanted to try induction. She checked me and I had made no progress, so she told me it was going to be a long labor. DH and I left to go to the hospital, but he decided he had to run up the street to work for a few minutes first. I think he was freaking out a little. I took the opportunity to call my family. We got to the hospital and they told DH he didn't have time to go home and get my things. That gave me hope that things would go well and fast. They came in around noon and placed cervadil to get my cervix ready. They planned to have me on that for 12 hours and then start pitocin around midnight. The cervadil brought on contractions and I started have intense contractions that were about 2-3 minutes apart. They were so strong that the doctor thought I would go into labor on my own, but every time they checked me I had made no progress. They offered me pain meds, but I refused, still hoping to have natural childbirth. They removed the cervadil at midnight, since I was having such strong contractions, they didn't start the pitocin as planned. However, by 4 am they came in and started the pitocin, because the contractions had leveled off. It didn't help at all. They kept upping the dose and nothing happened. I had contractions, but they were now 5-6 minutes apart and not very intense. Around 10 am, the on-call doc came in and told me that he recommended a c-section. I was very upset by this and we asked to have some time to think about it. A nice nurse came in and explained how the surgery and recovery would work. She also did one final internal and found I still had made no progress at all. I knew then I had to have the c-section, but DH and I took an hour and discussed it. I needed time to get used to the fact. We finally told them we would have the c-section, but before they could get to me (the doc had been ready to do it) two women went into the pushing stage. So we waited?.it was agonizing. I was upset about the c-section and scared. I also got upset by the Knocked Up preview on tv, because I kept thinking gI was missing out on having natural childbirth. Finally around 3:45 pm, they came and got me, I walked down to the operating room and there they gave me my spinal. The spinal affected my whole body. I felt like I could not breathe, I couldn't feel my arms, and I felt like I was in a dream. When DH finally came in, I looked over at him and said, "Pardon my language, but this is so f-ed up." I kept having to be reassured that I could breathe, because I couldn't feel my diaphragm. After a few minutes the doctor asked DH to look up and see the baby being born. DH later told me it was very strange to stand up and see a man sticking his hands into wife. A few seconds later, in the middle of this very surreal experience, I heard my son cry. It was the most real experience of my life. They took him to be weighed and cleaned, and then brought him over to me. Unfortunately, the drugs had made me sick and I couldn't kiss my baby, because I started throwing up. They took him to the nursery, finished up the surgery, and took me back to my recovery room. I waited an eternity for the baby, but I was so drugged up I barely noticed. My family came in and sat with me. I used the time to pontificate on drugs and why anyone would ever use them. I kept telling my teenage siblings to never do drugs! Finally around 7, they brought in the baby. My mom took him and he lifted up his head, opened his eyes, and looked around the whole room. I then got to hold my son, which was a wonderful experience. James was born on June 2 at 4:04 pm, weighing 8lbs, 9.5 oz, 20 inches long. My hospital experience after that I wont burden you with, except to say that it was awful. The nurses made me keep track of my pain medication times and then took a long time bringing them to me when I asked. They constantly pressured me to supplement him, because my milk didn't come in until day 5. He lost a lot of weight, but never developed jaundice. They kept giving him pacifiers, despite our asking them not to and the lactation consultant came in, looked at me, and said everything looked good. I knew, however, that he was not latching on. I ended up calling a highly-rec. lactation consultant who helped me over the phone. When it came time for us to finally leave, the doctor kept us until 6 pm. He told me wanted to see the baby on his evening rounds. He then walked over to the nurses station and I heard him quietly tell her that I would go home today, but they would have to see about baby. I was beside myself. Everything I read told me the delay in milk was normal, but everyone seemed to think I was crazy for not jumping to give DS formula. I finally realized that he would not leave until I started supplementing. DH and I consulted some books, and we decided that finger feeding him was the best option. They gave in and gave DH the tube and formula and left (no help or instructions) and so we figured out how to do it through a book. They did let us leave that night. The nurse carried our son out in his carrier, and while I watched other women be given wheelchairs. I had to walk out of the hospital. I could barely keep up with her and DH, who was trying to keep his son close by. The good news is that my milk came in that night and the next day we met with the lactation consultant I had spoken with over the phone. She helped tremendously, and DS almost immediately gained back 10 oz. However, the bad hospital experience made me really unsure of my mothering skills. I really struggled with my mothering skills. I cried a lot at first. We will not be going back to that hospital however. Continued bfing really helped me bond and gain confidence. James is now a thriving 6 month old!