Blended Families
taagent
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BM and SD's homework...
taagent
member
I got really annoyed tonight with BM. I should preface this by saying I am a former 3rd grade teacher and education is REALLY important to me! Education is not as important to BM.
SD is in third grade and her teacher doesn't "grade" her homework, she checks to make sure it is being done, but doesn't look to see if it is correct (as far as I am aware).
SD brought home her bookbag today and her homework folder was in it that still had her homework for last week (while she was with BM). I started going through all the homework because I wasn't sure what was due tomorrow. I asked SD what all the papers were and she said they were last week's homework. Before I knew that I find several incorrect answers on her grammar/vocab/spelling homework.
For example she tried to spell play (change to past tense) plaid instead of played, she spelled hungrily hungrly, and chased- chaseed.
I asked her if BM checks her homework and she said no, she never checks it. So now I am upset because what she is learning in school isn't being reinforced at her mothers house! I know that not everyone shares the same values but isn't being a good...or even decent parent mean that you care about your childs well being, education etc? The thing that completely sucks is that I don't think there is anything we can do about it either! Do you ladies have any suggestions?
SD is in third grade and her teacher doesn't "grade" her homework, she checks to make sure it is being done, but doesn't look to see if it is correct (as far as I am aware).
SD brought home her bookbag today and her homework folder was in it that still had her homework for last week (while she was with BM). I started going through all the homework because I wasn't sure what was due tomorrow. I asked SD what all the papers were and she said they were last week's homework. Before I knew that I find several incorrect answers on her grammar/vocab/spelling homework.
For example she tried to spell play (change to past tense) plaid instead of played, she spelled hungrily hungrly, and chased- chaseed.
I asked her if BM checks her homework and she said no, she never checks it. So now I am upset because what she is learning in school isn't being reinforced at her mothers house! I know that not everyone shares the same values but isn't being a good...or even decent parent mean that you care about your childs well being, education etc? The thing that completely sucks is that I don't think there is anything we can do about it either! Do you ladies have any suggestions?
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Re: BM and SD's homework...
The only suggestion I can offer is to continue to monitor her homework when she's with you and do as much as you can on your weekends.
More than likely, she's not going to take your advice, despite the fact that you're a former teacher. Believe me, regardless of your credentials, you know nothing.
My parents and sister are all educator and I'm a social worker, and all have offered suggestions regarding SS's behavioral issues in school. In fact, my sister, who teaches his at his level, sent a comprehensive email regarding the problem and how to address it. All have been ignored and she'd doing what she thinks is best because she's his mother (going to the school during naptime (when he throws his fits on a daily basis) and rubbing his back until he goes to sleep. Guess what happens when he doesn't show up?
Anyway. Sorry to hijack your vent. It's a PITA wanting to help and knowing how you might be able to do so, and being ignored in your efforts.
I don't know what else you can do except maybe talk to the teacher personally about it. My Step kids have a horrible time in school, both very smart and get most of there homework correct, but don't turn it in or just don't have time to do it. There mom also does not help them with homework at all, so it is very difficult for them.
We are in contact with both of there teachers about there classwork and how they are doing. The first week SD was missing 2 assignments and SS was missing 3! SD's never got done, because she was working on other things. We made her do them while with us.
Keep reinforcing to your SD how important school is and hopefully she will understand as she gets older. My SD is in a class that takes percentages off for being late, so her 2 missing assignments can only start from a 60, but she still needs to turn them in because it's better than a 0. She is learning quickly how important it is to get things done and do them correctly, and I'm sure as yours gets older she will too.
If the teacher doesn't grade the homework (which seems odd) then the easy solution is to have some homework time on your weekends. Ask SD to bring her school work to you and you can look at the areas and find some help for her online for those things.
Not necessarily make her do the whole thing over again, but maybe pick up some workbooks on the subjects she's having trouble with and come up with some kind of reward when she makes progress.
Maybe you could even find a tutor you could take her to.
Click me, click me!
I'd talk to the teacher to find out what the checking/grading policy of homework is, then I would work from there. At the least you're going to need to start checking it which sucks because for awhile I bet your house will be viewed as the homework/unfun house.
Thanks ladies, I think I will talk to the teacher. Thursday is open house and we will sign up for conferences that night. SD's teacher knows that I am a former 3rd grade teacher so she knows that SD's education is important to our family.
I agree that the grading system is part of the problem. I guess I will just have to wait and see what the teacher says