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When to tell?

micheloumichelou
in 1st Trimester

Hi there,

I'm new to the bump forums. I just found out that I am about 5 weeks pregnant. I go for my blood test today to confirm but the doctor seemed pretty sure that I am.

Assuming that the blood test confirms that I am in fact pregnant, how long should I wait before telling family? Friends? How long did you wait?

I have had one miscarriage, about a year and a half ago (we put the brakes on TTC after the miscarriage to heal physically and mentally). I was only 6 weeks and we had only found out we were pregnant about 5 days before the miscarriage. Needless to say we are excited that I am pregnant but nervous that this one won't stick like the last time.

I've read through some posts on the forum and I'm excited to get to know you ladies. :)

Michelle

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Re: When to tell?

  • CelticWifeCelticWife member

    First of all, Congratulations!

    For my first pregnancy, we told our family around 10 weeks (after my 9 week check up), and friends around 12/13. This one will probably be the same.

    But it really depends on what you are comfortable with. Personally, I didn't want everyone to know, because of I m/c I don't want to have to have that conversation over and over. At the same time, it is really hard keeping it a secret. :)

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    "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to be over, it's about learning how to dance in the rain." -Unknown

    Married 3-1-08  |  Nathan 11-24-08  |  Kaelyn 11-30-10  |  Alicia  8-17-13


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  • mypeanut2010mypeanut2010
    Congrats!  I found out I was preggo at 4 weeks.  We waited to tell everyone until we had the first ultrasound at 7 weeks.  I had a miscarriage 3 yrs prior at 6 weeks, so we wanted proof via picture that we were in fact pregnant.  We only told family first once the ultrasound was done, and then close friends.  Its totally up to you when you tell people.  It all depends on how much support you want to have in place in case (god forbid) something happen.  We had just told the family a week prior to my miscarriage.  It was hard to call veryone back to tell them the bad news, but its was nice to have so many people to reach out to.  Good luck and congrats!
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  • micheloumichelou
    Thank you both for the quick replies! I think we will probably wait until I get the blood test results back to tell family and then we will tell friends after the first ultrasound (right now scheduled for mid-April) if we can keep our mouths shut that long!
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  • Sue&PasqualeSue&Pasquale member

    we told our close family (parents and sisters and brother) right away. I then told some of my work at 10 weeks. we are going to tell the rest of the family on easter.

    Suzanne & Pasquale 9/9/07
    Our Journey in Blog.
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    Our Sweet boy Luca Salvatore 10/6/10 & Our precious daughter, Arianna Regina 4/9/13
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  • iammadiammad

    Do what you guys are comfortable with as there is no right or wrong answer.  We decided to wait until 12 weeks to tell anyone and happy we did because I ended up having a m/c.  We also decided to not tell anyone about the m/c.  We didn't want everyone upset, hearing all the 'sorry', and 'it all happens for a reason'.  I am happy we went that route. 

    When I get pregnant again, I'm not sure what I am going to do.  Wait or tell people after we hear the first hearbeat, but let them know about the m/c.

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  • cocojack10cocojack10 member

    CONGRATS! 

    So sorry to hear about your loss.  We too went through a loss last Jan 09, and it was devastating, and we too found out only a wk after our BFP.  We never told anyone then, just because we wanted to confirm via bloodwork, and we soon found out about the m/c.

    This time, we have confirmed the b/w, but are waiting for at least our first u/s.  Dh is very skeptical.  We have told our parents, but don't want to spread the news too quickly just in case. 

    Ultimately, it is a personal decision only you and Dh can make... when you are comfortable spreading the wonderful news.  GL!

    -- Jackie
    "If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane" -- Jimmy Buffett Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
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  • LeanneCMLeanneCM

    Congrats and welcome!!

     I told my work right away because I spend more time with them than anyone but my DH really, and I wanted them to know I have a good excuse for my crazies.

    But amazingly we have managed to hold off telling almost everyone else and will be going home to tell at 13 weeks 4 days - I am actually really proud of us for waiting :)

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  • McCradyToBeMcCradyToBe

    This is the hardest secret to keep! i think i've now told everyone i'm close with and we are just over 5 weeks. lol

    i told my family and my closest girl friends.  they would definitely figure it out when they see i'm not having wine with dinner more than one weekend in a row.  they all know the risks of telling people early, and it's nice to have their support even though i'm scared of it not sticking. but it will! fingers crossed :)  it happened on our honeymoon in Jamaica, so i think it's meant-to-be!  hehehe 

     So i say, tell who you are you are comfortable with telling!

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  • katiedearkatiedear

    I'm torn on this with you! This is our first, and I'm trying really hard to have us not tell anyone until june. I just know I wouldn't be able to deal with telling people if (god forbid) something happened. BUT, we had the convo last night about wanting to tell our families on Mother's Day if we get our u/s before that. However, his mother has a BIG (well meaning) mouth and I know she wouldn't be able to not tell anyone, so we might wait until we're a bit farther along just to avoid me killing her in a hormonal rage! :)

     

    Who knows?!? We may just blurt it out one day, lol. I'm hoping my fun plans for telling different people will keep me from just blurting it out though :D

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