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preggo friend vent (kinda long)

J-PancakesJ-Pancakes
in Infertility
I've been friends with this girl since kindergarten, so I was really excited to hear she was pregnant after trying a year. However, she has always had this "I know everything about everything because I've been through it" attitude. I told her about our IF problems shortly after her announcement in hopes that she would just be a little more sensitive with the baby talk around me. Instead, she has asked me to help plan her baby shower. This weekend, she picture messages me her invitations that she has filled out on her own. Then complains about how she's so stressed out because of all this pregnancy stuff. It really got to me when she said "My mom has been causing alot of drama... something I'm sure you get to look forward to when you get pregnant. it's much worse with a baby than just a wedding." How do you nicely tell someone that you don't want to hear about their pregnancy anymore? Or do I just take it, like punches to the gut?
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Re: preggo friend vent (kinda long)

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    Ren's brideRen's bride member

    Whenever I get an insensitive comment I am usually just speechless.  It's only afterwards that I think of something that I should have (wish I would have) said but of course by then my gut has already taken the punch.   :(

    2009: 1st IVF began 12/29, cancelled due to OHSS; 1st full IVF began 2/10 ER 2/27 ET 3/4 BFN 3/13; IVF #2 began 5/23 ER 6/4 ET 6/9 BFP 6/18 Lost our baby on 9/12. 2010: IVF #3 (w/PGD) began 2/1 ER: 2/15 ET: 2/20 BFN 3/1; Took a break for hernia surgery and recovery; IVF #4 (w/PGD) began 6/30 ER 7/13 ET 7/18 BFN 7/27; IVF #5 began 10/23 ER 11/5 ET 11/10 Low Pos 11/19 BFN 11/22; Took a break: got a 2nd opinion,changed insurance,chose a new RE,and recharged emotionally. 2011: "Back-to-Back" IUIs on 6/4, 6/6, and 6/7 BFN on 6/21. "Back-to-Back" IUIs on 7/3 & 7/5 BFN on 7/19. "Back-to-Back" IUIs on 7/30, 8/1 & 8/2...the journey continues into 2012 with three more IVFs and 6 more IUIs...now looking at IVF with donor egg Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Daisypath Anniversary tickers
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    ichoosehopeichoosehope

    Really, I would just be honest with her and explain your feelings. If she is really a good friend, she try to be more considerate of your feelings.

    I am sorry that she is being this way....hugs.

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    mapst77mapst77
    That stinks... you'd think she would have been a bit more sensitive... if she weren't your close friend i would say punch her  LOL  but i guess that is not an option Devil  Sorry that you have to deal with this
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    jehnmjehnm

    Through this, I've learned some people are just unable to be sensitive.  I have friends that do and say all the right things, but my closest friends don't.  I recently tried to tell one of my best friends of 20 years why it's hard for me to always share in the pregnancy details (she's been married 6 months and pregnant first month of trying) and she just got really angry and didn't understand at all.  I've had that response more than once so you really have to judge how your friend will react if you speak a little more honestly with her.  I wasn't prepared for a negative response!

    I'm so sorry your friend hasn't gotten clued in on her own! 

    TTC #1 since 12/07 SA 9/08=borderline normal HSG 1/09 found R tube blocked Multiple IUIs both with oral and injectible drugs from 2/09-2/11 Started domestic adoption process in 5/10, homestudy complete 9/10 Failed adoption after home with baby for 2 weeks 11/10 Blessed through the miracle of private adoption with a son, born 6/6/11 (his grandma's bday) 7lbs 9oz 20.5 inches long! So worth the wait!
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    butterfly843butterfly843
    Sorry she is being so insensitive. If she keeps up with comments like that I would let her know they are bothering you, if she continues then distance yourself for a little while.

    Jenn

    image 3 IUI's all BFN

    IVF#1 BFN IVF#2 BFP, loss at 19 weeks FET#1 BFN IVF#3 BFP, m/c FET#2 BFN

    Missing our twins Zachary and Madison, lost at 19 weeks on 11/13/09, edd 4/9/10

    BFP 7/17/10, m/c 7/25/10, edd 3/25/11

    Ectopic, lost left tube 4/20/11, edd 12/6/11

    my blog

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