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Babies: 9 - 12 Months
i'm in a really ugly place and need some help
we are dog lovers. always have been. until lula showed up. i used to be so judgey of people who had a baby and started neglecting their dog. until i became one.
a little background: we've had our pom for 8 years. she was my DH's dog before i came into the picture. in fact - when we first moved in together she used to bite my ankles and run when i hugged or kissed him. haha. but over the years we've learned to "love" each other since neither of us is going anywhere.
in the last couple months her health has started to fail. she has a severely collapsed trachea and reverse sneezes and coughs all the time. sometimes she coughs so hard she throws up a little. it's awful. she's had 3 bouts of major diarrhea and has pooped on the floor several times. (some i believe to be intentional and some not). i took her to the groomer yesterday and before i put her in the car for the less than 10 minute car ride home i walked her along the grass to potty (in the snow) she did - and then peed in the car on the way home.
i just don't know what to do. each time i take her to the vet they act like it's no big deal. she's getting older and this stuff happens. well maybe it does - but i can't have dog secretions all over the floor that my 10 month old baby is all over the place on. they give me some $40-$80 medicine and sent me on my way. ouch. we can't afford to keep getting the meds at that price.
my DH has completely shut down telling me, "well - you just do what you think you need to do." great - so it's all on me. don't get me wrong - i love katie - i do. and when it really boils down to it - i don't want to get rid of her. and i don't want to put her down. it honestly breaks my heart. but i can't wake up every morning and clean up dog poop/pee/throw up. ugh. its really starting to affect our marriage - in a bad way. i feel so distant over this.
what do you think? help... please. my heart is just broken over this...
{forever remembered and missed my sweet babe}
*m/c 10/10/10 - 7w0d*
This discussion has been closed.
Re: i'm in a really ugly place and need some help
he is super sensitive about her. she's like his second baby. he just doesn't know what to do about it. he gets really defensive everytime i bring it up. he says, "well - i'll clean it up." and he does - when he's home. but that doesn't change the fact that it's there to begin with.
i just wish there was a magic fix.
{forever remembered and missed my sweet babe}
*m/c 10/10/10 - 7w0d*
Can you confine her to one area of the house so that she is still with you (in a play pen type thing) but not making a mess all over the house where you are with DD?
Poor thing, I feel bad for the dog being sick. And you for dealing with it! It would be a very tough position to be in.
Of all of your options, I would NOT take her to a no kill shelter. She's pretty much unadoptable in her current state and it would break any dog's heart to be taken out of the only home that she has known and be placed in a cage. She's old and sick and nothing about this is her fault.
If her quality of life has deteriorated to the point where you are really thinking of putting her down, have the decency to be with her to the very end.
Personally, I'd work around all of this. Put a plastic sheet under her in the car. Clean up right after her or keep her confined to certain rooms of the house. See another vet for a second opinion.
I know how you feel. Our doxies are (were) our babies. It's hard to have little dogs with a baby. One is fine with Lila and othe other, not so much. The one who isn't is only 6 but has a terminal illness that requires us to have to take her every three weeks for shots. She's perfectly normal and happy on the treatments, so as much as I'd like to, i can't justify not doing them at $60 a pop. The treatments make her slightly more agressive with food and she has to go to the bathroom a lot more often (has accidents too).
I'm just sharing our experience, because believe me, a part of me would REALLY like to be done with this. But I made a choice to take care of her and love her, from the very beginning. The baby was the second choice I made, and I knew from the beginning I'd have to deal with them together. So we have chosen to keep her on the treatments until they fail and we are forced to put her down. Like I said...it's just my experience. I know where you're coming from though. It's really tough.
This is what I was thinking.
Our old dog started losing control of everything, but you just have to deal with it.
When our dog got older we reverted to crate like training, the dog was only allowed in the kitchen unless chaperoned. At least then the mess is easier to clean and you can keep your LO mostly out of the kitchen unless it is clean.
Maybe somebody else in your family could take her, until she goes? You could offer to keep paying for her meds/vet bills, but at least you wont have the everyday trouble. And your DD could visit her.
This happened to my friend, who had twins. So, she really just couldn't keep them both out of the puke/poop the dog did. Her in-laws took the dog, and she takes the girls over to visit alot.
I was going to suggest the same thing.
The mess would really start to take a toll on me as well and you're in a tough spot but unless the dog is in pain I don't think I could put it down.
Good Luck!
I'm sorry you're going through this. If the vets haven't talked to you about putting the dog down then she is probably not that bad. I know it's hard to hear, but I really think you need to suck it up & do the right thing by honoring your commitment to this dog. My pets are perfectly healthy & still have accidents or get sick. It's not always convenient with a crawling DD all over the floor. I suck it up, clean it up & love my pets. I had a cat who lived to be 20 years old. I gave her medicine & cleaned up her accidents. It was hard - but I adored her. When it got to the point where she was not enjoying life I knew it was time to put her down. I talked to family & the vet and the decision still wasn't easy & at times I still wonder if it was the right thing.
I'm sorry. I hope you find peace in whatever you decide.
I didn't read through all of the responses- so sorry if this has been suggested already.
Have you tried calling a regular people pharmacy and asking if they carry what your vet is selling you? Our lab had bronchitis. We got a $30 Rx from the vet. Turns out dogs and people get the same meds for bronchitis and it's a $4 generic at the pharmacy. The vet should be able to call it in or give you a written Rx to get filled. Also- have you tried any homeopathic remedies? The vet gives us Rx ear stuff for to clean his ears but it turns out that apple cider vinegar does the same thing and costs far less. I'm not sure what would help your sick puppy but there must be something out there...
that's what i was thinking. they make them for when dogs are in heat... give it a shot!
We do this with our old dog. Ive always said that once a dog lost control of her bowels, we would euthanize, as I believe that at that point the quality of life goes down. BUT the crate training is working very well, so I clean up whatever mess she makes if any and we are taking it day by day.
(This is my husband's dog too from before we got married, and I would come home to urine all over the couch...uugh... but its gotten so much better crating her when we arnt home/asleep.)