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brideonjuly8
member
NBR- I want to be a thoughtful person....
brideonjuly8
member
May of you know that my dad passed away 4.5 years ago. He only had one living member of his immediate family, his younger sister. She had 2 kids, Kelsey and Jared. Growing up we would visit them in KS at least once, mostly 2xs a year. Kelsey is 2 years younger than I and we aren't super close, but we get along and always have. She's the best of the best kind of people.
Kelsey is going to be graduating from the Seminary this May. She's in Divinity School to be a Minister. Her family growing up was never overly religious, they occasionally went to the Christian church (my dad and his family grew up going to the Christian Church, my grandmother played the organ and piano).
Anyway, when I was about 15 (and Kels was 13) our moms were going through my grandmothers house (she was moving into an assisted living apt) and we were dividing up some things. Out of everything our moms said we could have the only thing we both wanted was a small white gold cross with a tiny diamond in the middle. We had to "pick a number" and I "won" it. I kind of felt bad at the time, but we both were getting lots of other things from her.
I love the cross and have worn it lots over the years, but haven't recently because it scratches Steven when I wear it and hold him- the points of the cross are pretty sharp and so are the prongs that hold the little diamond.
The thought crossed my mind when I heard that kels was graduating to be a minister to give it to her as a graduation present. But a big part of me doesn't want to part with it. It's the only jewelry I have from my grandmother (and anyone from my dad's side of the family) since my aunt got all the other stuff. Another thing- her other grandmother's husband owned a jewelry store for years and she passed away 2 summers ago. My uncle (kelseys' dad) is now the only living relative in his family so their family got ALL the jewerly she had- and it was a lot. Lots of costume, but also lots of diamonds and nice nice stuff. So, when my aunt passes kelsey will have TONS of jewerly from her, but I'm (praying to God) that won't be for quite some time.
I'm really torn. I would love for her to get some use out of it as well, but she's not a huge jewelry person. She didn't get her ears pierced until she was in college. I've thought about having one made to look just like it and give her the real thing, but it just isn't the same, ya know? But giving her the cross would make me feel really good. ((sigh))
WWYD?
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Re: NBR- I want to be a thoughtful person....
Hold on to it. Once you give it, you can't give it back. She'll get a ton of stuff for graduation. Maybe consider it again in a year since you're so conflicted now. When and if you decide to give it to her, it will be greatly appreciated even if it isn't a gift for a particular event.
If it had just been sitting in a jewelry box, I'd be more inclined to say give it but it sounds like it's a piece that means a lot to you.
What about having one made for her, but still keeping the old one for you? That way she has something as a reminder, but it's also significant of her new start in life.
I don't think there's anything wrong with keeping the old one for yourself. You did win it. You enjoy it. Your DS won't always be little and you will get to wear it again.
Besides, who's to say that she still wants it. The division of goods was a long time ago. If she's not a jewelry person, she wouldn't be wearing it and jewelry is really meant to be worn. It does no one any good stuffed in the drawer as a memory item.
Jacob David (01/07), Matthew Isaac (12/08) & Kasey Elise (9/10)
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I totally LOLed! She's going to have some PHAT diamonds here in a few years. ***green with envy***
What a hard decision! You are sweet to think that way. I don't know what I would do though. I keep on going back and forth, and it isn't even my necklace!!!
How about this:
Get in touch with your cousin, and let her know that you've been thinking about having a copy of your necklace made for her as a graduation gift. Mention how special your necklace is to you, and let her know you thought she might want a matching one because of memories of grandma, etc. BUT tell her you remembered that she doesn't wear a lot of jewelry, and didn't know if she would wear it or if there is another gift that she might prefer/be more useful to her/etc. as a beginner minister.
Discussing it with her would ruin the surprise aspect of the gift somewhat, but it would be a good way to answer your questions about it.
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That's such an amazing thing you are thinking of doing. It's such a wonderful symbol and I think it would mean a ton to her, especially with a heartfelt note from you. I'm don't wear much jewelry either, but something like that would mean so much to me.
I know it would be hard to part with something that came from your grandmother, so I understand why you're hesitant. I vote to give it to her.
Have a replica made and give her that. I cherish the token jewelry my grandmother gave me. I could not stand to part with it.
This is what I'm thinking too.