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Would you be upset if someone else got dd bcp or ds condoms?

darlene'smommydarlene'smommy member
in Parenting

This came up today with a friend and whated to know how everyone felt about this.

 

I have told dh, family and friends that if dd or anyother children we have came to them wanting bcp or condoms to get them for them weather they tell me or not about it.  I would like my daughter or a other child I have to come and talk to me or dh but if they feel better talking about it with one of our friends or family members I am fine with that.  And I also feel that if my children dont want me to know untill they tell me I am fine with that aswell.  I do want dd and any other girls I have to have bc and condoms to prevent any stds and be told what they need to know and have any questions answered same with any ds I may have (besides the bc part unless its there for males then he will be getting it to). 

 

What are your feelings on this with your children?  A friend of mine thought it was stupid and would never be ok with a friend or family member giving her child this stuff or talking to them.  She would want them to come to her only.  She was also a teen mom not on any bc.  I would not have talked to my mom about this nor my dad but I would have with my grandmother or my friends mom who I would have talked to about getting it and they would have and let me tell my parents on my own.  I did not need bc untill I was old enough to get it on my own anyways but I was glad I could talk to someone that I was comfy with. 

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Re: Would you be upset if someone else got dd bcp or ds condoms?

  • JOEBunnyJOEBunny member
    I would want them to tell me if she was very young and not in a relationship, but if she was 16 and dating someone and I was stupid enough not to take her to the doctor and make sure her "acne" required BC for treatment, then shame on me.  I hope my fam/friends would pick up my slack.
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  • stacynikkistacynikki member
    I would be sad they hadn't come to me but happy they got it from someone.
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  • Halo79RNHalo79RN member
    I think your friend is unrealistic...  I was and am close to my mom... but I still don't talk sex to her and I didn't go to her for bcp /condoms even after we talked about it many times.   I'd definitely give people the okay to do so. I worked in a peds office briefly...  moms never think their dd or ds is doing it....  then the pedi would ask mom to leave the room and would have a talk with the kid... sure enough , stuff , maybe not intercourse, but stuff was going on.
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  • PinkPianoPinkPiano

    I would expect my family/friends to call me and tell me what was up.  I don't think it would be cool if they went behind my back and got bcp & condoms for my kids.  But if they called and told me about it I would really appreciate it and hopefully figure out why my child couldn't come to me and open the lines of communication.

     

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  • CleoKittyCleoKitty member

    imagestacynikki:
    I would be sad they hadn't come to me but happy they got it from someone.

    Exactly.

    That being said, I'd hope that if either of my children gets to the point where they feel that they are old enough and mature enough to have sex that they take responsibility for getting it on their own (although it would certainly be nice if they felt as though they could be open with me about it.) If the kid isn't capable of buying a box of condoms at the store or going to Planned Parenthood after school then maybe they ought to reconsider the whole sex thing, you know? When I started having sex I didn't have to ask for someone provide me with birth control- I took responsibility and did what I needed to do.

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  • ZenyaZenya member

    condoms = no problem.  BCP I have reservations about (as a general statement).  They made me kind of crazy and so I'd like to know if my teenager was taking a medication like that.

    That being said I'd get over it.  I'd be happy (I hope) that they were being responsible.   

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  • Halo79RNHalo79RN member
    imageCleoKitty:

    imagestacynikki:
    I would be sad they hadn't come to me but happy they got it from someone.

    Exactly.

    That being said, I'd hope that if either of my children gets to the point where they feel that they are old enough and mature enough to have sex that they take responsibility for getting it on their own (although it would certainly be nice if they felt as though they could be open with me about it.) If the kid isn't capable of buying a box of condoms at the store or going to Planned Parenthood after school then maybe they ought to reconsider the whole sex thing, you know? When I started having sex I didn't have to ask for someone provide me with birth control- I took responsibility and did what I needed to do.

     

    I agree... I plan on teaching my children if they are too embarrassed to buy condoms, they need to rethink... but at the same token,  they are asking an adult...  too many of these kids in the office were not old enough to drive yet and were fooling around.   scares me.  

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  • darlene'smommydarlene'smommy member
    imageCleoKitty:

    imagestacynikki:
    I would be sad they hadn't come to me but happy they got it from someone.

    Exactly.

    That being said, I'd hope that if either of my children gets to the point where they feel that they are old enough and mature enough to have sex that they take responsibility for getting it on their own (although it would certainly be nice if they felt as though they could be open with me about it.) If the kid isn't capable of buying a box of condoms at the store or going to Planned Parenthood after school then maybe they ought to reconsider the whole sex thing, you know? When I started having sex I didn't have to ask for someone provide me with birth control- I took responsibility and did what I needed to do.

    Here where the highschool is its really far from planned parenthood so if my child does not have a car at that time they would need a ride and I would prefer dd getting them from her doctor at the time.  Also at 16 im not sure if my child would have a job or money to pay for them on their own. 

     

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  • DandelionMomDandelionMom
    I would want to know about bcp because we have a bad family history with those that I'd want to discuss with my DD and her doctor.
    .
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