Must tell bride her MOH is pregnant

mintchip33 · March 2010

Hi all! I'm a newbie and this site is really great, since no one knows my news yet (except DH)!! Anyway, I'm due in Oct. and I'm MOH in a friend's wedding in August. I'm a little scared to tell her! I know she'll be happy for me, but before I got pregnant, she made joke about me making sure I waited until AFTER her wedding to start trying (Which was my plan! But things just didn't happen that way). Has anyone else been in a similar situation? How did that conversation go?

Mrslove78 · March 2010

Congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I've never been in that situation, but I think this would be a very fun post to talk about on thenest! I would love to hear how she reacts! When will you tell her? Keep us posted will you? It will be so interesting to see how she reacts.

mintchip33 · March 2010

Thank you!! I'll definitely keep you posted. I think I'm going to have to tell her very soon, since she wants us to order our dresses in the next week or so! eek, I wonder how big I'll be by August!

I'd rather not tell anyone till 12 weeks or so, but oh well!

NSL · March 2010

Just tell her. Unless she's a douche, she'll be happy for you.

cndmexbaby · March 2010

You have nothing to feel bad or guilty about. Just tell her your news point blank and let her know you're willing to bow out of the wedding party if she is not comfortable with you being pregnant at the wedding. I had a bridesmaid who had just given birth and she still looked pregnant. I was really proud she stood up for me. I don't see what the problem is with pregnant attendants.

mintchip33 · March 2010

Thanks, gals! I agree, I also had a bmaid who had just given birth and I didn't care at all. In fact, I feel like the bigger I am, the skinnier the bride will look. ;-D BUT, I'm definitely going to let her know I'll step aside if she prefers, no problem.

I know she'll be happy for me... I'm just irrationally nervous about it anyway!

MJHershey · March 2010

She could have been joking... one of my BMs got pregnant on the first try and was scared to tell me (she had also told me they were going to start trying and hoped it was okay). Of course it is!!! I was ecstatic for her and I now say that her daughter was a junior bridesmaid. She was 6 months along and looked so beautiful.

Weddings are about family and I sure hope your friend is happy for you and understanding.

RBC · March 2010

I have been in your situation. Funny, her wedding was in August too. However, she knew we were trying and there was a chance. She was fine. I did give her an out but she's my friend and it's more about that. I will tell you the dress thing was stressful. You just don't know how big you're going to be and most places you have to order the dress months in advance. Have a good seamstress lined up. GL

AutumnBride21 · March 2010

I am also a MOH in an August wedding... I just found out this week that i am prego..But the bride knows we were trying anyways.. so i know she will be happy for me.. and I am sure yours will be the same

doublem · March 2010

One of my bridesmaids was about 7 months along in my wedding, and I didn't care - I was so excited that she was still willing to stand up for me! I will be 4 months along for my friend's wedding in May, and I am secretly thankful because all of the other BMs are a size 2 or 4, and this way I have an excuse to be in a size 10 dress (hoping that will be big enough) LOL. I haven't told her yet, partly because she's been totally bridezilla lately and partly because it's so early. I *think* she'll be happy for me!

happyhoopla · March 2010

I should be about 32 weeks along when I'm the MOH in a wedding in September. My friend was incredibly excited for me when I told her.

lenfant1201 · March 2010

mintchip33:
Hi all! I'm a newbie and this site is really great, since no one knows my news yet (except DH)!! Anyway, I'm due in Oct. and I'm MOH in a friend's wedding in August. I'm a little scared to tell her! I know she'll be happy for me, but before I got pregnant, she made joke about me making sure I waited until AFTER her wedding to start trying (Which was my plan! But things just didn't happen that way). Has anyone else been in a similar situation? How did that conversation go?

Congrats & welcome! I'm in exactly the same situation. I was supposed to be MOH in my friend's wedding in MEXICO in early Dec, and I'm due on 11/24. There's no way I'll be up for traveling by then. Even though I want to wait to tell friends, I'm going to go ahead and tell her so she can find someone else. It's bittersweet, but I'm super excited to be KU!

I think your friend will be fine with it, and if she's not, you can always bow out (I'm not saying you should or that she should ask you too--just that you can if you think it's going to cause drama). You might not feel like standing on your feet in heels for pics and everything anyway!

SuperThat1006 · March 2010

NSL:
Just tell her. Unless she's a douche, she'll be happy for you.

LOL This.

Dermy167 · March 2010

My sister was my MOH and she was 36 weeks pregnant on the day of my wedding. She was really nervous to tell me she was pregnant, but I was super excited for her and did not care in the least that she would be a pregnant MOH. Plus she looked really cute with a huge belly in a bridesmaid dress.

skyejo · March 2010

I'll be in a wedding when I'm 17 weeks (so not as far along as you, but still pregnant) and I told the bride this weekend. I thought she might be a little upset but she wasn't at all.

I ordered my dress months ago and tried it on for the first time--it's a flowy dress so it's not tight on my tummy, but it's really tight on my chest and I could barely zip it up. The bride was totally cool and said that I could just leave it unzipped and drape a shawl over my back to cover it. I thought she would be so pisssed but wasn't!

Just tell your friend. Unless she is a complete jerk she will be happy for you.

StephieLM · March 2010

Congrats! Welcome to the board!

I'd be pissed if someone made a joke to me about waiting to try to have a baby for their sake.... =/

I understand she was probably kidding but geez......

In my friends wedding her SIL had the zipper in the back taken out and then had pretty ribbon to tie the back....like a corset type look...turned out pretty.

GL!

BryansBride28 · March 2010

2 of my bridesmaids were preggers for my wedding and 1 JUST had her baby. I was not upset AT ALL!! Very excited for my friends and it's cool to say that their LOs are in my pics, haha.

aclendenning · March 2010

she should be supportive. I am getting married in May so i will be around 16 weeks and i was def planning on waiting till after the wedding for children but it didnt work that way and i couldnt be happier. ALSO my little sister is a bridesmaid and is due 2 weeks before my wedding, i was so excited for her i couldnt even think about being upset about it.

bmx4 · March 2010

I was 36 weeks pregnant and the MOH in a friend's wedding. Even though she was happy for me, I think she honestly was a little disappointed because I was tired and not as much fun for the shower and bachelorette party. I wore the same dress as everyone else - I just had to order the biggest size they made and extra length - and I spent a fortune in alterations. I also got to wear flats - everyone else wanted matching shoes but I just ignored them (LOL).

Due to the time frame of the dress ordering, I did tell the bride before I wanted to. She wanted me to go and try on bridesmaid dresses with her and order them the same day. I actually told her before I told my own parents. She kept the secret and it all ended well.

harea · March 2010

I was actually just in the same situation! Actually I've been there twice! Don't worry about it! I'm sure she will be a little upset but most of all she will be happy for you! I just told my best friend that I was pregnant and I an due in Oct. also! Her wedding is in Sept. She was happy for me and still wants me to be in the wedding!

My wedding... I was in the same boat! My sister-n-law told me she was pregnant and she was due a week apart from my wedding day! She opted out of the wedding and I was okay with that also! Good Luck! I'm sure it will all work out

barnwife · March 2010

My sister was 6 months pregnant at my wedding. She didn't find out until after dresses were ordered. She called and said "there is no way my dress will fit."
I replied, "Is there a reason for that?" She said yes. I said "Congrats! When is the baby due?"

Your friend should be happy. The seamstress worked her magic and the dress was fine.

Now I will be 7 months pregnant in my SIL's wedding. She is so excited for us. Hopefully your friend can be excited for you!

MSC03 · March 2010

If she's a true friend, she will be excited for you and not care that it's right before her wedding. That's why they make maternity bridesmaid dresses, right?

mintchip33 · March 2010

Thanks everyone! you're all making me feel better! Big Smile

I really think I am going to have to tell her before I tell my parents. She'll keep it a secret, I'm sure. I'll give an update once I've broken the news!

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