Wanna hear some infertility jokes?

shoebox4 · March 2010

Found this on FertilityGal blog:

https://www.fertilitygal.com/Message-Boards/Infertility-Chat/Funny-infertility-jokes-.htm

-How does an RE like his eggs?
Over 20mm!
-Why did the RE cross the road?
Because there was an affluent, infertile woman in her 30s on the other side.
-One ovary says to the other ovarie, "Hey, did you order any furniture?"
The other ovarie says, "No, why?"
"There are a couple of nuts outside trying to shove an organ in."
-Why does it take 50 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
Because they won't ask for directions either!
-Two sperm were swimming through a woman's body.
The first said, "Whew. I'm getting tired. Just how far is it to the uterus?"
"The uterus?" the second laughed. "We're not even past the esophagus yet!"
-How can you tell if a man has a high sperm count?
You have to chew before you swallow!
-How do you know that God isn't a woman?
Because if God was a woman then sperm would taste like chocolate!
-You know you are trying to get pregnant when:
You look at your vegetarian sandwich and the alfalfa sprouts look like sperm . . .
or . . . Someone asks you today's date and you reply "Day 21" . . .
-Why do gypsies have trouble getting pregnant?
They have crystal balls.
-Why do male basketball players have trouble getting their spouses pregnant?
All they do is dribble.
-How many infertility patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Screw in a lightbulb! Hmmm . . . do you think it might help? . . .
-How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two but I dont know how they would get in there

thebeadinglady · March 2010

My DH is going love these! thanks for posting!

jkmcnamara · March 2010

LOVE it! Thanks for sharing!

BTW, I have noticed for YEARS that alfalfa sprouts resemble sperm. The first time I told that to my mom, she told me I was gross Stick out tongue

wishingforpositive21 · March 2010

after quite the exhausting, and down in the dumps day.... thank you i just LAUGHED OUT LOUD!

Babsie7 · March 2010

Lmao!

My favorite is:

"How many infertility patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Screw in a lightbulb! Hmmm . . . do you think it might help? . . ."

It's about how I feel these days... if it could possibly help, I'll try it!

BEAUNAL · March 2010

These are great!

DaniGirl0517 · March 2010

Today sucked, this spread some happiness on my day. Thanks! DH and I liked the "How do you know God isn't a woman" one. And the "chew before you swallow" was the funniest but also the most Ick!

so it get's extra points

Mr&Mrs.B · March 2010

really needed that!! Thanks!

JakesBride07 · March 2010

Too funny...this totally brightened my gloomy morning.

AletheaP · March 2010

Eeewww, the chew before you swallow one made me gag tho it was quite funny. Oh, and "A lightbulb, do you think it would help" cracked me up - SO true! Thanks for a laugh.