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Postpartum Depression
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yep.

ScissorTailedFlycatcherScissorTailedFlycatcher member
in Postpartum Depression
I've just recently been diagnosed with PPD. With having a preemie that has severe reflux, it took me two months to figure out that what I thought were normal hormones, frustration, and sleep deprivation were actually elements of this crazy disease. I have my good days. I have my bad days. I often have days that just feel numb... a numbness I've never felt before. I often start to write posts and just press and hold the delete button. I'll stare off into space until my eyes lose their moisture. On my bad days, I'll cry so much that I look like I lost a bar fight.?My medicine has been helping little by little. Because I have a history of sleep-related anxiety, my doctor prescribed Lexapro. Unfortunately, now all I want to do is sleep.It's so hard not to feel like a bad mom... or a bad wife. My husband "luckily" is not working, so he has really been able to help me out. He has definitely been more understanding since my diagnosis. I think he thought I was trying to get out of my responsibilities as a mother, that I was just being lazy. I just couldn't handle her.We've been battling severe reflux with her since she was 3 weeks old. A miserable baby definitely makes for a miserable mommy. We've tried EVERYTHING. She was maxed out with meds, on several different formulas, and tons of home remedies. We finally have her under control (to a degree), so it's been a little easier. I still freak out anytime my husband mentions that he wants to go do something. All I can think of is, "But that means I'll be left alone with her!"?It's not fair to them that I'm going through this. I just hope it gets under control soon.?
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Re: yep.

  • sleepingbeauty825sleepingbeauty825 member
    You just can't get a break, can you? I mostly lurk here because I don't want to name my feelings just yet, but since I "know" you I wanted to offer my support. You seem like a very strong and level-headed person, I can only imagine how hard this must be for you. I hope your medicine continues to help and remember that there is NOTHING wrong with you or your mommy-capability. Hopefully you will be back to your normal self soon. :)
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  • mrsbnlmelmrsbnlmel member
    I can relate to the preemie with reflux thing.That can send anyone into a tailspin- it does not make you a bad Mom!  We haven't struggled with it to the severity it sounds like you have but with what we did experience, I can say I am so, so sorry! Reflux is terrible, nightmarish and unfair.  It sounds like you have been cheated out of a lot. If you ever want to talk we are here. And FWIW Lexapro has been wonderful for me. It was the best choice I made to go on meds. GL!
    PCOS dx 2008 | BFP #1 2/26/2009 with Metformin
    Owen Matthew 11/1/2009 4lbs 10oz 16.5in
    Born 5 weeks early by C/S | Severe Pre-Eclampsia
    BFP #2 5/1/2011 | M/C @ 7 weeks | D&C 5/25/2011
    TTC #2 | HSG Clear | SA 2% Morph otherwise great
    3 failed Femara/TI cycles moving on to IUI
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