Trouble TTC

A lil slice of heaven

I sometimes get bummed out when I look in my backseat and I have a huge car seat and no baby.  Or when I find a burp cloth in the dryer.  It stings a little when I open the freezer and see a bag of frozen breast milk and know it's not mine.

And then I get days like today ... I have a baby exersaucer in the middle of my kitchen and binky on my finger and my gorgeous niece sound asleep on the couch next to me.  It is a little slice of heaven when I get to spend a morning like this with her.

(all of the above stuff is hers, obviously, that I have because I pick her up from the babysitter occasionally or just for Auntie time)

Our Journey to Brenden

IVF #1: 4/11(Follistim/Menopur/Ganirelix) 10 retrieved/8 mature and all 8 fertilized / 2 embies transferred ... nothing to freeze Beta 5/10 = BFN

IVF Take 2 Long Lupron July 2011

ER 7/3/11 (our 6th anniversary) - 8 retrieved/7 mature/fert ....ET 7/6/11 - 2 beautiful grade A 8 cell embryos

Beta 7/18/11 - 149!!! Beta 7/21/11 - 311 Beta 7/28/11 - 2,000 8/5/11 - Empty Sac 8/8/11 - There's a yolk sac and maybe a heartbeat 8/12/11 - Fetal pole, yolk sac, heartbeat 8/18/11 - Baby looks GREAT!
3 babies waiting on ice


Lilypie Second Birthday tickers


Re: A lil slice of heaven

  • I know a lot of women around here have a hard time being with babies, but my G girl is so special and sweet that I just relish in it.  Sure, it still hurts, but at least I have her and my sister who lets me have her pretty much whenever!

     

    Our Journey to Brenden

    IVF #1: 4/11(Follistim/Menopur/Ganirelix) 10 retrieved/8 mature and all 8 fertilized / 2 embies transferred ... nothing to freeze Beta 5/10 = BFN

    IVF Take 2 Long Lupron July 2011

    ER 7/3/11 (our 6th anniversary) - 8 retrieved/7 mature/fert ....ET 7/6/11 - 2 beautiful grade A 8 cell embryos

    Beta 7/18/11 - 149!!! Beta 7/21/11 - 311 Beta 7/28/11 - 2,000 8/5/11 - Empty Sac 8/8/11 - There's a yolk sac and maybe a heartbeat 8/12/11 - Fetal pole, yolk sac, heartbeat 8/18/11 - Baby looks GREAT!
    3 babies waiting on ice


    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers


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  • there is nothing I love more than hanging out with my nephew or my friends' babies. they just remind me of what i know i'll have one day !

    monday morning i babysat for my friend so she could go to a job interview. her 5 month old fell asleep while i was holding him, which apparently is rare for him to do. we just sat on the sofa and snuggled which was so awesome. 

    **** TW - kids and loss mentioned ****
    ~~ married 8.11.07
    ~~ DD1 1.16.11 ~~ DD2 1.3.14 ~~
    ~~ BFP3 12.22.15 MMC 2.29.16 @ 13 weeks ~~
    ~~ 2 D&Cs (3.1.16 and 3.10.16) for MMC
    ~~ BFP4 10.27.16  MMC 1.23.17 @ 16 weeks ~~ D&E 1.26.17 ~~
  • imageladipale:

    there is nothing I love more than hanging out with my nephew or my friends' babies. they just remind me of what i know i'll have one day !

    monday morning i babysat for my friend so she could go to a job interview. her 5 month old fell asleep while i was holding him, which apparently is rare for him to do. we just sat on the sofa and snuggled which was so awesome. 

    that is awesome. i just babysat my friends 6 month old and she did the same thing.

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  • Gabby did the same thing this morning, but I finally laid her down because she needs to nap for a couple hours and I needed to get a few things done.  She should be up soon, she's been down for an hour and forty five now.

    She's sick at the moment so she's a little extra cuddly which is nice. :)

    Our Journey to Brenden

    IVF #1: 4/11(Follistim/Menopur/Ganirelix) 10 retrieved/8 mature and all 8 fertilized / 2 embies transferred ... nothing to freeze Beta 5/10 = BFN

    IVF Take 2 Long Lupron July 2011

    ER 7/3/11 (our 6th anniversary) - 8 retrieved/7 mature/fert ....ET 7/6/11 - 2 beautiful grade A 8 cell embryos

    Beta 7/18/11 - 149!!! Beta 7/21/11 - 311 Beta 7/28/11 - 2,000 8/5/11 - Empty Sac 8/8/11 - There's a yolk sac and maybe a heartbeat 8/12/11 - Fetal pole, yolk sac, heartbeat 8/18/11 - Baby looks GREAT!
    3 babies waiting on ice


    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers


  • I have a 5 month old nephew, and I've gotten to spend some time with him at family gatherings.  On Christmas he was a little fussy during the end of dinner, so I held him and danced around the living room. 

    I was equal parts sad and elated when he fell asleep on my chest, so I laid my cheek on his head, closed my eyes, and swayed, just enjoying that short time.  It's a moment I won't forget anytime soon. :)

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  • My SIL has triplets- BIL has a singleton that are all under a year. I volunteered to watch the set on Mondays and it's honestly been one of the best decisions ever. I get as much baby as I can possibly stand. As much hugging and holding, and cooing and diaper changes. I don't think I would find it nearly as peaceful if we hadn't been TTC since before they were born.

    There are so many of them that I can hold one all day and no one accuses me of monopolizing the baby. My sister has a 4 year old and I virtually never got to hold her- there was always a line and someone to come take her away after a few moments.

     

    image
    Friends for 15 years. Married 8. TTC since January 2009
    2010 Diagnosis: Anovulation and Severe MFI
    2011 Treatment:
    IVF w/ICSI #1 Antagonist: 2 blasts - c/p - BFN 04.22
    FET #1: 1 blast/1 early blast - BFP 06.22 - m/c 06.30 @6w0d
    07-11 RPL: MTHFR C677T Heterozygous & Slightly elevated ACLA IgM
    FET #2: 1 morula - BFN: 9.02

    January '12: IVF #2
    Started BCP and Metformin (New!) 12-14 for stimming in January

    Dum spiro, spero.
    ?SAIF/PAIF/PgAL/PAL always welcome?
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