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Single Parents
Who took what when things ended?
I was thinking about the last post about achases bed situation and I was curious who took what what when things ended. X and I had just moved into our apt. and he brought all the kitchen things/bedroom furniture/patio furniture, when I kicked him out, I kept everything. What makes me laugh is when he divorced his first X, she took everything also and he bought all new. Now I have all of his "new" things and his parents had to go buy him a new bedroom suit so he'd have somewhere to sleep at night. The only thing he took was the Keurig Coffee Maker (which I can't really use anyways at the moment).
Oh and his grandma (the mean one) gave me her antique rocking chair as a baby gift but announced in front of the family that when X decides to get rid of me, she wants it back... I still have that also and don't plan on giving it back until she personally asks for it.
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Re: Who took what when things ended?
good question!
I left the apt my husband and I were sharing. We just got married in August so all the stuff we ( RATHER I) registered for....is in there....when I first left i felt like saying...keep everything. Now...I am not so sure.
I dont want to be one of those wives who divorces and takes half of everything...but i know there is a lot he wont use....plus we just bought a new king size mattress for 1500 and I am sleeping 7 mos pregnant on a crappy day bed (single) in my parents house and sharing it with 2 cats! The mattress is the poorest quality too.
how do you figure out who gets what?
What? Why the heck not? You absolutely should get half of everything. Don't you think you and the baby will need it way more than he will?
When H first left he took his work clothes, two pants underwear, socks, toothbrush and toothepaste, deoderant. That's it!
After about 4 weeks I packed up all of his clothes and any personal belongings I could find of his. It took him an additional 2 weeks to even come get it!
I offered him our living room furniture and the 52" tv. After another month of the tv sitting here, I sold it on craigslist. If when we move he hasn't gotten the living room furniture I may sell it.
He took the dishes, and pots and pans and thats it. We are using my moms now.
I will start new once I'm living on my own.
It is going to be Saturday, April 10. I will have household items and a lot of baby stuff!!
I got the house, my car, living room furniture (I bought before marriage), bedroom furniture (I bought before marriage), the plasma in the living room, HD DVD player, and pretty much 95% of everything else.
He took his clothes, random crap, the blu ray, Wii, and the smaller plasma from the bedroom (leaving a nice hole from the mount - jerk).
To the previous poster asking who decides - you can do it the easy way, or the hard way. The easy way would be trying to talk sensibly with your x, and dividing assets and THEN having a lawyer draw up papers. This is what we did. The harder way is via mediation, or having your attorey, or a judge, figure it out.
Also, anything left behind after 30 days you are free to donate and use as a tax write off
I took my personal things and the kids personal things. I wanted nothing he had or the bills that went with them. I got DD bedroom furniture when we moved to another state because I had just paid cash out of my bonus to upgrade he to big girl room just months before I left.
We bought hand me downs and rented until I got on my feet. We did not have much be we had what we needed. The older I get the less stuff I need.
X had originally agreed to leaving with the crap tv, his x-box, dvd player, computer, car and knife set... He basically was going to walk away with nothing but his game stuff (and knife set he has had since he flunked cooking school). But then his mom got involved and told him that he needed to take more then that... He took the crap cat scratched leather couch he found somewhere, pots and pans, all electric kitchen things except the microwave, his knife set, the knife block/set we got for when we got married, the flat screen HD tv, the blu-ray, his x-box, computer, lawn stuff, and car. He left me with the crap tv and the broken dvd player - I think he broke it just to piss me off, laptop (becasue I'm still paying for it), bedroom set (minus bed), living room set, dining room set, dishes, glasses, cutlery... I dont know if I am missing anything, my parents packed me up.
I was trying to split things evenly based on their worth... he was most interested in the best for his gaming and could care less about the rest and said that he was trying to leave me with stuff when I get back on my own for the kids and he would buy new.
DITTO, I left everything behind me, except my luggage, and went later to get the rest of my clothes (the ones he didn't decide to trash). I'm soo glad I didn't announce the baby registry til I got to MD. Now I have everything for the baby! Yes I had to get furniture (IKEA BABY) but I love the fact that I started over again! Nothing will remind me of him except the baby inside me, and these days he feels like MINE....ALL MINE!!! Oh and I also took a football that was signed by some Hall of Fame winner. He was mad about that! But my son will appreciate it very much! I might sell it or toss it around the back yard with little Ethan!
I was really fortunate because as we were dividing assets my mom was getting rid of her furniture so I gave him my mom's old furniture and a bed my dad had bought to move back in to my parents house right before he died. The only things he took from the house were the 51 inch tv and a recliner. The house was in my family's trust account so he couldnt touch it. I got to keep out 4 month old mattress, all of the dvds (he collected so many of them. funny story about the dvds below) the furniture, pretty much everything.
Funny story: So when he was still livng here and we first separated he had moved into my moms house. Well when it was his visitation we would switch and he would stay at the house as to not uproot DD#1. Well I found out after that stopped that he had been stealing the DVDs out of the cases. He had just moved to CO at this time too. So i called my lawyer and she told him that what he had done was theft and if he didnt return them he would be held in contempt of court and that I would prosecute to the fullest extent. Needless to say I got back the over 100 DVDs he stole from me...
Woo hoo! I might have to make the drive for that one! LOL