MIL throwing me a shower question — The Bump
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MIL throwing me a shower question

My MIL and SIL wanted to throw me a separate shower with their side of the family and their friends.  I wasn't crazy about the idea of having two showers but it seemed like they really wanted to do it so I agreed.  We didn't discuss dates or anything and today MIL informs me that she wants to do it in April.  I will only be like 26 weeks pregnant and that seemed really early to me...this shower is all for family and friends who are local so no one will be traveling in town for it.  I told her that I am not sure how comfortble I am with having it that early and asked her if their was a reason why, and she said no...just that they don't know what their plans are in May and June yet and she knew her April was free.  Was it wrong of me to ask her to hold off until May or June for the shower?  I just have this weird feeling that she wants to have her shower "first" and that is why she is pushing for April.  Should I just get over it and let her do it in April or stick to what I am more comfortable with? 

Re: MIL throwing me a shower question

  • I don't see anything wrong with having a shower at 26 weeks.  Better than the 2 I just had a 37 weeks.  I was/am large, uncomfortable and had to sit through most of it because my back hurts if I'm on my feet for more than 20 minutes.

    Is there a problem with her having a shower "first"?  Is there competition in your group of family and friends?

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  • Yes there is some competition between our families....and I guess I was hoping she would have it in May or June so my best friend could come.  My other shower is May 15th and it has to be this date to accomodate my grandmother and my best friend cannot come on May 15th but would be able to come for a late May or June shower.....so I guess it is a little selfish of me to want it when I want it to accomodate my best friend.
  • No, that makes sense.  Does you MIL know that's how you feel?  If not, I'd let her know, and maybe stretch the truth that April may not work for you (work, school, etc.) and May is better.  "Then my Best Friend would  make it then and having her there would mean so much to me!".
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    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker[/center]
  • I agree I had mine at 39 weeks last time and I was SO uncomfortable and it was the end of August... I say whenever youre comfortable
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  • 26 weeks is fine.

    I know you want your BF to be there, but I actually find it really rude to ask you rMIL and SIL, who are doing you a FAVOR of offering a shower, to do it at a time that may not be good for them for ONE person. 

    The shower is about you.  Not your BF.  She really is not a "must attend" person. I don't think a shower needs to be scheduled around her.

    ALso, whether your MIL wants to go first or not - who cares?  The shower is for a different group.  I don't see what the order has to do w/ it.

    "Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
    ~Benjamin Franklin

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  • I agree with ECB.
  • I am a little confused -- would your BF be on the guest list for an IL side of the family shower? 
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