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laurieb602
member
DD had me crying all night!
laurieb602
member
So you all know my story...well we have an appt with the adoption attorney very soon so the DH can adopt DD...she wants this so very much and has even changed her last name at school (her teacher said it was fine). Last night she told me that she wants to call DH dad! She said that it felt weird though because she's never called anyone dad...that broke my heart, makes me feel like I failed her! Don't get me wrong I know her fathers actions are not my fault but I should have been more careful! Of course the caveat in that is that had I been more choosy in a mate, I wouldn't have my amazing 11 yo DD! It just makes me so sad that she is just now understanding and feeling a fathers love, and she's blossomed in the last year just knowing this man loves her like his own daughter! Ok I'm done cause im going to cry again at my desk! Wish us luck at the attorneys office on the 15th!
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Re: DD had me crying all night!
Good luck!
Better she know a fathers love now, then never.
this!
LUCK!
This!
I know that there will be someone out there who will love Mikayla more than anything and accept her as his own
)
There absolutely will be!! My DD's middle name is Mikayla (pretty sure I've told you that), I just love that its spelled the same and everything! My little girl has waited long enough for this and I couldn't be happier! I had lunch with my mom yesterday (we work for the same co) and she said that my step dad is so excited that he can finally just be papa...he's been trying so hard to fill a father role in her life for her entire life...I was actually pretty anxious that he would feel tossed to the side (he always did Donuts for Dads at her school and that kind of thing) but he is absolutely elated and loves DH to pieces and is more than happy to turn that role over to him. DD and papa have an amazing connection though, one I wouldn't trade for the world!
"...step dad is so excited that he can finally just be papa...he's been trying so hard to fill a father role in her life for her entire life..."
See this makes me want to cry! We named Mikayla after my father, who passed away two weeks after I found out I was PG. He called me the morning he passed away (he passed late in the evening) and wanted to tell me that he wanted to be the best grandfather and help me raise DD since X was going to be away in the AF. Luckily my uncles are like fathers to me also and they love Mikayla so much already... and X is still going to be around, I just hope he steps up and is the father DD deserves.
Your story is so amazing though. My BFF tells me all the time that I will find someone who will love us more than anything - I'm okay waiting for that person to come along whenever he is fine and ready
Now this has made me cry.
I'm so glad to know that you have found a good man that will be a good father to your daughter. So what if it took you 11 years to find him. It was better for you to wait until you found the right guy than to settle and be with the wrong one.
My advice is never ever rush it! I was in a relationship for 5 years before I (re) met my DH and I can't even imagine if I were married to him. He didn't mesh with Alyssa at ALL and never ever treated her like his own child...I kept thinking, is this all there is? Is this all we will ever have...thankfully he dumped me (begged to come back later) and I ran into Brian (DH) like the same week and we immediatly knew we had to be together...he was at all of her soccer games, parties, family events even before we officially started dating...Alyssa could jump on his back and he would carry her around, spend hours in the front yard working on soccer skills...I've been amazed how someone with no ties to a child can love her as much as he loves Alyssa...let me tell you, it takes an amazing man and that is the bare minimum you ladies deserve...amazing, so just wait for him...he's out there!
And there is absolutely nothing wrong with your uncles filling that role since your father passed (I'm really sorry to hear that)...all that matters is that she is surrounded by as many people who love her as possible and that she has a strong male figure to look up to so she knows how a man should treat a lady.
Alyssa's biological grandparents have zero to do with her but DH's parents call her their granddaughter and his sister is ecstatic to have a niece (she has 3 boys)...there has never been any mention of her being a step anything...
I feel beyond blessed with the journey I have taken in my life...I look back to being pregnant at 18/19, no money, no father, no hope and I smile now...it all brought me here, to this place in my life...I think if I hadnt had all the rough patches in my life I would not have done half the things I have done now...being the sole caretaker and provider for another life makes you examine hard everything you do...without her, I don't think I would have been motivated to go back to school, get my degree (nothing better than her watching me walk across that stage, btw) and make an amazing life FOR her...
I am so excited that there is a board now for you ladies, I remember feeling so alone 10 years ago...and I cannot wait to see how wonderful your lives turn out for you and your LO's!
What an AMAZING story! It reminds me of that song (it's country not sure if anyone listens to it) called "God Blessed the Broken Road (That Lead Me Straight to You)"
OMG that gives me goosebumps!
That is about the sweetest thing I have ever heard. Period.