Ever wish you could go back

crystalknpp · March 2010

to when you didn't know as much as you do today about TTC and loss. I was thinking about this last night. I would love to be that naive girl that thought all I needed to do was have sex unprotected at some point in the middle of my cycle and I would get KU. Knowledge is a great thing but sometimes I feel like all that I know about TTC now is also causing me so much stress and possibly preventing me from getting pregnant. Unfortunately now that I know so much I think not temping, using OPK's,using preseed and doing anything else I could to get pregnant would stress me out to. I just want to be one of those girls who's period is late so she decides to test for the heck of it and ::Surprise:: BFP! I'm tired of being the girl stressing over her chart and MF signs everyday of the 2ww constantly thinking about whether or not I'm KU and then being sad when AF shows up! I also thinks its unfair that when I do get my BFP again I'm going to be just as terrified as I am excited and it just shouldn't be that way!

bebeblues · March 2010

Yes. I wish I could be one of those blissfully ignorant people that just blurt out they poas and it was a bfp. Wishful thinking.

I keep thinking I just need to get to the u/s at 6wks and see a heartbeat---But I know that's still not going to be reassuring enough bc sooo many lose their babies later than that. Then I think, after that 10-12wk appt, I'll feel so much more relaxed......and then I remember that SOOO many have lost their babies after that.......and so on and so forth.

Basically I try to remember that there is no guarantee in life. I'm a Christian, so my view is that life lies in God's hands, not mine.

((hugs))

Yes. Yes, I wish I didn't have to know what I know.

candylies · March 2010

Totally. why couldn't i just get pregnant by accident??? Sometimes it's like TTC overload in my brain.

hbkises · March 2010

I hear ya..I wish I could be there girl who's late and oh BFP and 6 weeks along.

it's unfair that we've all been tainted this way...

crystalknpp · March 2010

bebeblues-I hope you have a very H & H 9 months and a very uneventful easy pregnancy!

candylies-I would love to be able to turn off the TTC Brain Overload because it is really starting to stress me out and I think that's my biggest problem!

candylies · March 2010

Funnily enough I have 'turned it off' this cycle. I don't want to know when I O, don't want to know when FWP week is, don't want to know when 2ww is and I don't even want to know when AF is due....but will still be disappointed when AF arrives...can't help that.

writergirl5786 · March 2010

yes. to everything mentioned. yes. we no longer get the joy (well blissfully ignorant joy, anyway), the innocence or the naivete. sighs. but hopefully...we will all still get our babies very soon. even if ttc sends us over the edge. Smile

((hugs))

crystalknpp · March 2010

candylies:
Funnily enough I have 'turned it off' this cycle. I don't want to know when I O, don't want to know when FWP week is, don't want to know when 2ww is and I don't even want to know when AF is due....but will still be disappointed when AF arrives...can't help that.

I told myself that this cycle once I confirm O I'm gonna stop temping so that I can't overannalyze my temps during the 2ww. Well see if I actually have enough will power to not temp.

pepomntpat · March 2010

Yes, I miss my naivete. ::looks back fondly::

jdoman · March 2010

Simple answer: Yes.

weavjess · March 2010

I agree. Sometimes it's so hard to stay positive and not worry. ::hugs::

northshore25 · March 2010

I wish this everyday! The stress of it all is too much for me. I know that I will never have an "oops" and find out I am KU. It is very depressing.

ksyknelvr73 · March 2010

I totally agree and just wanted you to know that you're not alone. I'm almost as scared to get pregnant again as I am NOT to get pregnant. It sucks. Last time, we weren't even really worried if it happened or not b/c it was our first cycle "trying". And by trying, basically what you said....just having unprotected sex while I wasn't on my period and just *maybe* something will happen. I was late on my period, tested, got a BFP. So excited, thought everything would be perfect (why wouldn't it be). It's such a harsh reality and I think we really stress ourselves out over all of this. I think I need to go and get hypnotized...haha.

crystalknpp · March 2010

ksyknelvr73:
I totally agree and just wanted you to know that you're not alone. I'm almost as scared to get pregnant again as I am NOT to get pregnant. It sucks. Last time, we weren't even really worried if it happened or not b/c it was our first cycle "trying". And by trying, basically what you said....just having unprotected sex while I wasn't on my period and just *maybe* something will happen. I was late on my period, tested, got a BFP. So excited, thought everything would be perfect (why wouldn't it be). It's such a harsh reality and I think we really stress ourselves out over all of this. I think I need to go and get hypnotized...haha.

Yeah its really hard. I'm really doing my best NOT to stress myself out this cycle and just say "If it happens it happens" but well see if I can actually do that or not!

denise_m · March 2010

Absolutely.

Hell, I wish I could go back to October 14, hear Matthew's little cough, run him to the ER and hopefully the monitors would have caught him not breathing or having difficulties while maybe there was still time

mdm2137 · March 2010

I would absolutely love to be innocent and naive!

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