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I am really scared for my goddaughter (NTR)--LONG

squishysgalsquishysgal member
in Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

My cousin is a few years younger than I am. She has been diagnosed with OCD and Bipolar (YEARS ago). She got married 2 years ago and now things have progressively gotten worse. She has been in and out of the hospital 6 times in the last year (2009) and 5 times just the past 3 weeks. She was almost arrested for assualting  a police officer but he decided not to press charges because he felt bad for her.

She has a 9 year old, my goddaughter, who lives with my aunt and has her ENTIRE life. Before her most recent hospitalization my cousin threatend to kill my aunt infront of the 9 year old. She ripped the birthday card that the 9 year old made her and then stepped on the gift without even opening it. She told her that "You are the biggest mistake of my life. I wish you were never born."

After her hospitalization, she told the 9 year old, first words out of her mouth "Wow, you're getting fat!" (which she is not!) Then proceeded to tell her that "I want you to know that before I went to the hospital I took all of your pictures off my walls because I wanted nothing to do with you. If you don't start to sleep at my house I am not going to put them back up."

My cousin keeps signing herself out of the hospital, refuses to take ANY responsibility for ANYTHING, refuses to go to a day program and tells anyone who will listen how it is all my aunt's fault she is the way she is.

In the mean time, I have this precious 9 year old who is, on the outside, handling this all very well, but...I can't imagine what this is actually doing to her. She is getting counselling and my aunt is wonderful. I try to see her once a week if not more (she has a pretty full schedule for a 9 year old!). But I am so scared of what will become of her.

I have no point to this post other than to get it out of my system... Thanks

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Re: I am really scared for my goddaughter (NTR)--LONG

  • emmgirlemmgirl
    that's sad.  at least she does have some people that love her and will take care of her.  sounds like the mom made a good choice in having you as godmother.  best of luck.  
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  • djandkellendjandkellen
    Awwww, that's really sad.  I hope she is actually able to handle that...  I'm sorry she's dealing with it and you are too.  
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  • Pumpkin111Pumpkin111 member
    That poor baby.  I'm sorry this is happening.  That's not fair. 

    I guess, I've never been around truly bi-polar people.. but my dad is ocd about having the house clean and staying in control of things - nothing hospital worthy but it made things hard for my mom. 

    I wonder if she's got something else wrong with her.. like an addiction or something?  That sounds like things an addict would say when they aren't high. 
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  • Tess12Tess12 member
    That is so sad.  Hopefully the positive forces in her life will outweigh the negative influence of her mother.  It's good that you're able to make time for her on a regular basis.
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  • CalifloridaCaliflorida member
    ugh.  i'm glad she has you, your aunt and her counselor to show her she's loved.
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  • rach312rach312
    That is so sad.  I hope your cousin can one day get the help she really needs before she hurts herself or someone else.  I hope your goddaughter gets through this okay and she is very luck to have you and your aunt in her life. 
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  • squishysgalsquishysgal member

    Thanks ladies. She is SUCH a good girl. She gets all A's. She sings in church, goes to CCD, plays soccer and softball and smiles all the time. I just can't help but feel like it is all a mask.

    She is great with DD, so I try to play it off like she is helping me when she comes over. Some times I ask her to "babysit"... I will be scrapbooking and the two of them will color. Or I will organize my files and the two of them will play (in the same room). I hope it gives her a sense of self worth and love...I hope.

    As for my cousin...I just don't know how this will end for her, but I don't have a good feeling :(

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  • EchowyspEchowysp member
    I'm sorry that has to be so hard on a little girl.  Give her extra love and care.  I hope everything works out.
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  • LuLu38LuLu38
    keep doing what you are doing.  Stability, love, providing for her (with her aunt).  Therapy is great.  And, she is getting old enough to help educate her about her mother's illness.  Take care.  GL
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  • LuLu38LuLu38
    I tried to 'bold' your comment about her behavior being a mask.  I agree.  She also needs to understand that she does not have to be perfect; her perfection might be a result of feeling like she is a terrible child and trying to please everyone.  Again, if she is educated about her mother's illness, she might understand that this is not her fault, she does not have to be perfect, etc.  
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  • libby73libby73

    Sounds like either your cousins meds are not correct for her or she isn't taking them.  My mom is bi-polar and every once and a while she will get a little excited with talking but her medicine typically keeps her in check.  Hopefully the counselling will help your goddaughter understand that her mom is sick.

     

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