I have to wait 6 MONTHS!!!!!

MaMaSiBs · February 2010

WTF, I just got back from my follow up appointment after my m/c and I had a list of questions for her of course. One question was, how long do I have to wait before ttc again?? Now I was expecting 3 months, because that is what seemed to be the norm on the board. She said 6 months, OMG!!! I just started bawling in her office and was like, it took me 6 months to conceive this baby and I was pregnant for almost 4 months and then to wait 6 months to have it take possibly another 6 months or longer to conceive again is just a life time too long. Then what if it happens again. Then we are 2+ years out from when we started and back at square one again. AHHHHHHHHH! I am just so angry!!!!!!

celestej619 · February 2010

(((hugs))) I'm so sorry. Did your doctor give you any explanation for having to wait 6 months???

Sonadora · February 2010

Did you have a partial molar pg?

I never heard of such a long recommendation otherwise.

Did she give you any reason?

HeatherPB1020 · February 2010

Sonadora:
Did you have a partial molar pg?

I never heard of such a long recommendation otherwise.

Did she give you any reason?

This is what i was thinking.

cintim · February 2010

Sonadora:

Did you have a partial molar pg?

I never heard of such a long recommendation otherwise.

Did she give you any reason?

I agree. I've never heard of such a long wait time unless it was for a partial molar. Did you ask why so long?

AppleRidge · February 2010

Whoa...really? I've never heard of someone being told to wait 6 months unless they had a molar. You need to ask what the medical reasons are for the 6 months, if you haven't already.

There are women all over the Bump who are pregnant 3 months after delivering babies full term. Not saying that's the best way to go, but just illustrating why her advice doesn't make much sense.

xleslieraex · February 2010

Sonadora:

Did you have a partial molar pg?

I never heard of such a long recommendation otherwise.

Did she give you any reason?

This. That sounds like a crazy amount of time.

denise_m · February 2010

Did she give any reasoning for waiting of long?? I have never heard waiting more than 3 cycles with a first tri loss.

I would consider asking for another opinion.

eminbmore · February 2010

Wow, that is nuts - I agree with the other girls, 6 months seems excessive for a loss at that point (unless there are extenuating circumstances) and I might get a second opinion on that one.

GL!

ShandaB · February 2010

I was 21 weeks along when I gave birth and I only had to wait 1 regular cycle before TTC again. 6 months seems so excessive.

MaMaSiBs · February 2010

No everything was normal, that is why I was so confussed. When I asked her why, she just said to make sure that my body recovered because I was pregnant and did dialate and my body should be given time to recover. I asked her if 3 months was okay and she said she allows that for her older patients but was always taught to wait 6 months.

Now the part that KILLS me is that during my u/s today the tech saw a good sized follie and I was sooooo excited about that and then to hear I have to wait...... I am so heartbroken I thought that some people were able to try right away???

schen0510 · February 2010

((Hugs))

CLAYLIOVER · February 2010

cintim:
Sonadora:

Did you have a partial molar pg?

I never heard of such a long recommendation otherwise.

Did she give you any reason?

I agree. I've never heard of such a long wait time unless it was for a partial molar. Did you ask why so long?

same here..

kilissa · February 2010

If you aren't in love with the doctor, you might want to consider a second opinion. Six months seems pretty long for a first trimester loss.

str8ota · February 2010

As all of the pp I agree that 6 months seems long. With both my delivery with Patrick and my ectopic with emergency surgery I only had to wait 3 months. Is she the only ob you see or is there another ob in the office you can get a 2nd opinion from?

I'm sorry you have this on top of everything else.

OCIrishBruin · February 2010

(hugs)

My acupuncturist said 6 months as well. My OB and PCP said only one cycle. But, I am trying to wait the full 6 months anyway, which is almost over.

If I were you, I would get a second opinion if you don't think you can handle waiting that long.

denise_m · February 2010

MaMaSiBs:
No everything was normal, that is why I was so confussed. When I asked her why, she just said to make sure that my body recovered because I was pregnant and did dialate and my body should be given time to recover. I asked her if 3 months was okay and she said she allows that for her older patients but was always taught to wait 6 months.

Now the part that KILLS me is that during my u/s today the tech saw a good sized follie and I was sooooo excited about that and then to hear I have to wait...... I am so heartbroken I thought that some people were able to try right away???

It sounds like she isn't necessarily up to date on modern medicine. Yes, at one point, a decade or two ago, 6 months was the standard wait time. Most doctors agree that now there really isn't a need to wait more than a cycle.

I would suggest finding a new doctor.

Jenny102783 · February 2010

kilissa:
If you aren't in love with the doctor, you might want to consider a second opinion. Six months seems pretty long for a first trimester loss.

This. :::hugs:::

MaMaSiBs · February 2010

Well I did tell her that I was NOT at all happy with waiting 6 months and that MH and I do not use any sort of BC and never have. She told me I should start, lol. I said it is against my religion and that I was able to avoid pregnancy for 6 years with DH and then we actually had to try for our DD and then for our angel baby. I was surprised it took me 6 months to conceive this baby and wanted to start trying ASAP incase it took longer to conceive this time.

I actually switched Dr's already and really like her. My original Dr was aweful and it's a long story but she was lazy and not very thourough or cautious. So I switched and I love everything else about my new Dr except that she suggests I wait 6 months.

grr_aargh · February 2010

But did she explain why she suggested you wait 6 months?

jumagirl · February 2010

I'm really sorry - both for the loss and for the crummy dr. I echo what pp have said and would suggest getting another opinion. Unless there is a concrete reason specific to you or the pregnancy that ended, I would be skeptical of advice to wait 6 months.

BeachCole · February 2010

denise_m:
MaMaSiBs:
No everything was normal, that is why I was so confussed. When I asked her why, she just said to make sure that my body recovered because I was pregnant and did dialate and my body should be given time to recover. I asked her if 3 months was okay and she said she allows that for her older patients but was always taught to wait 6 months.
Now the part that KILLS me is that during my u/s today the tech saw a good sized follie and I was sooooo excited about that and then to hear?I have to wait...... I am so heartbroken I thought that some people were able to try right away???
It sounds like she isn't necessarily up to date on modern medicine.? Yes, at one point, a decade or two ago, 6 months was the standard wait time.? Most doctors agree that now there really isn't a need to wait more than a cycle. ?
?
I would suggest finding a new doctor.?

This. I would get a second opinion.?

amjra · February 2010

That is crap. Seriously. Google it and find another new doctor.

Most doctors just say 3 months, or whatever, due to EMOTIONAL not physical reasons.

We lost our TWINS at 23w5d 2 months ago.. and I was given the go ahead 2 weeks back.. to start trying NOW!

MaMaSiBs · February 2010

She told me that she tells everyone to wait six months and that was what she was taught was a safe time to wait and let your body recover. She is young and not long out of school, so I was surprised and thinking maybe it was the heads of the practice that have set this time limit on things like this and she is just following them.

She did say I could try after 3 months, but she didn't think that was enough time for my body to recover ::eye roll:: I know tons of women who get pregnant right after having a baby and they didn't even get a period yet, they just got pregnant and have healthy babies.

I was thinking since this was my first m/c I would just wait the 2 weeks to have sex like they suggested and if something happens then it happens and if it doesn't then it doesn't and atleast I was trying and not wait some rediculous amount of time. What do you all think? I really like this Dr. so I hate to switch again and see someone else.

grr_aargh · February 2010

Well, my thought is that I don't recommend going AMA and TTCing when you've discussed it with my doctor.

Having reviewed the literature, though, I dislike the fact that my phsycian might try to treat me psychologically. There are no physical reasons to wait, only psychological reasons. . . the literature will show a negligable increase in miscarriage risk for women who conceive less than 3 months after their loss. Unless your physician is planning on doing testing that might unearth issues that require treatment, I cannot believe that 6 months is a reasonable wait for an average couple who's gone through a loss.

pink hydrangeas · February 2010

Personally, I wouldn't wait. I am a firm believer that when your body is ready - you will get pregnant. 6 months just seems so unbelievably excessive. (((HUGS)))

mdm2137 · February 2010

pink hydrangeas:
Personally, I wouldn't wait. I am a firm believer that when your body is ready - you will get pregnant. 6 months just seems so unbelievably excessive. (((HUGS)))

This. If you get pregnant, you get pregnant. She will still be your doctor.

heathergirl67 · February 2010

Don't wait. Start TTC as soon as you want to. That's what I would do, at least. If you got pg right away and then had another MC would you blame yourself and be destroyed by guilt? If not, then go for it. Your doctor is following the trend of what she was taught back in medical school (which she even admitted, saying it's "what I was always taught"). There has been new research and studies since then that she apparently hasn't read up. At the very least I would get a second opinion.

MaMaSiBs · February 2010

Thank you so much ladies, that is what I was thinking too. I feel like you gals are my second opinion,lol. {{HUGS}} to you all and thank you for the kind words. I am still having a hard time making sense of this whole thing, it just hit me even harder to think IO would have to wait so long to try again.

KristysRedBarn · February 2010

I'm so sorry. Six months seems too long. I would take what she said only as a suggestion. You and your DH need to do what's right for you.

northshore25 · February 2010

That is so long!! My Obgyn told me to wait 2 months. During my 2 month wait I went to a new dr. and had a physical...just a general check up. I mentioned to her that I had a MC and asked how long I should wait. (I just wanted to hear her advice; I was hoping it would be 1 cycle) She told me to wait 6 months. I was really shocked. But, I think it was more of a recommendation for my emotional well-being.

Needless to say, I am following the 2 month advice.

GL and I hope you get an answer for the 6 month wait.

babes12 · February 2010

i had to have a c-section and only waited 3-4months to start TTC again. i'd definitely get a 2nd opinion. there's lot of ob's out there that are understanding and willing to work w/ patients that feel strongly about TTC sooner after a m/c or loss.

GL!

MrsEzStar · February 2010

That seems rediculously long. My doctor says they tell people to wait more for their emotional well being. I say try when you are ready to try! I started trying ASAP, and ignored my doctor's 3 month advice. It takes to long to get pregnant naturally to wait all of that additional time.

You are in my thoughts and prayers and I am so sorry you are going through this. Right Hug

june21jbr · February 2010

I agree with everyone else. I was told to wait 6 months b/c at the end of my trauma I had a vertical incinsion on my uterus. So, if because of that I had to wait only 6 months.......I cant imagine you needing 6 months to recover from a miscarriage. Because I know how bad the 6 months blows, if I were you I wouldnt wait. I would definately be trying if I wasnt scared my ute would rupture!

KeriMac · February 2010

Oh Brooke, I am sorry! I think bc she is so young, and therefore so Green, she is airing on the side of caution. My MW said she suggests waiting 2 cycles, but it's up to me and my body when I am ready. She said there is NO MORE RISK or less in trying in 2 weeks or 6 months. I think some OBs recommend 2-3 months bc you might not ovulate right away and charting/ temping can be confusing and inaccurate and it doesnt hurt to give your body a little time to recoup...

I am drinking wine, eating soft serve ice cream, focusing on DD, and allowing myself to greive a little, but we won't "prevent" past my 1st period. I had my heart set on having my kids close in age and I know I will get anxious the more that gap widens.

You will know when you are ready!!!! LOT OF HUGS YOUR WAY!!!!

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