how am I going to get through this? (long)

supernic · February 2010

I know I haven't posted too much but if anyone is interested, I could use some happy thoughts. I'm having such a difficult time right now. We are in our 2ww for cycle #2 and DH has just been notified that he's being sent away for 6 months... He leaves in 2 days. We thought that we were safe to start ttc because the chances of the military deciding to send him somewhere were non-existent. We were so wrong. And I'm in Italy, with pretty much no support network and I can't go back to the states because if there is the opportunity for us to see each other, then it's going to be much easier if I'm here. I know 6 months isn't forever and I don't know if I'll even be pregnant but I'm having such a hard time coming to terms with this. Not just the possibility of being pregnant and alone but just being alone and in a foreign place. It's tough living here even with my husband around. I never thought I would be relieved to find out that I'm not pregnant but now I'm thinking that it would be too difficult to handle. I'm so torn up inside. Has anyone been through a moment like this?

jc51723 · February 2010

I don't have any good advice, but I just want to say that I admire military wives so much. I don't think people realize the sacrifices that you have to make!

I hope everything works out for you!

jteneback · February 2010

I'm sorry, that's tough. Is there an expat community you could get involved with? Other military wives? Do some traveling around the country or Europe? Hugs to you!

Temp356619000002780 · February 2010

I have no advise but I do wish you the best of luck!!

RileyGrace · February 2010

That sucks. I think there is a military families board, maybe on the nest.

SimoneSays22 · February 2010

I'm so sorry. *hugs*

I can see how that would be stressful. My best friend's husband is in the military and she's pregnant, so I understand where you are coming from based on her experiences.

Just wanted to say that I'm sure if you do get pregnant, you will get through it. Sometimes you don't know how strong you are until you are tested. GL.

NavyGMWife · February 2010

Ok...deep breathes! Yes, this is not the best situation for you right now. However you could easily be stressing over something that may not happen. Do you chart your temps? How do you know that you have O'ed this month. Maybe you didn't O this month and things will b eokay.

I've been there in your shoes DH was sent away right before our wedding (Navy - 10 month deployment) and got home literally the week we got married. I planned and did everything without him and he never saw one thing until the day of the wedding.

You are strong or you wouldn't be a military wife in the first place. Just wait and see what happens...I know easier said than done.

Hang in there!

luckyfrgg · February 2010

Aw, I'm so sorry you're looking at a 6 month deployment. My DH is former military and in his current job he travels for extended periods from time to time, so I can sympathize.

It just plain sucks, and I can't really say anything to make it better, except that I've learned how to claim my alone time for myself. He's away now, and I admit that before he left I was kind of looking forward to being able to enjoy some me time. DD and I totally bond when DH is gone, which has its ups and downs, obviously, but we get through it.

I will say, though, that I'm totally bummed at the idea that this cycle may be bust, because now we have to wait to try again until DH gets back into town. *sigh*

mrsf123 · February 2010

I'm so sorry you're going through this. DH works really long hours and sometimes I don't really see him for weeks on end. That is lonely and difficult for me. I can't imagine how it would be in a different country all alone! Is there someone who can come from home and stay with you? Your mom or a sibling or best friend who can come visit?

MiniSun09 · February 2010

I can't give you advice about being a military wife but I can help you to look on the brightside... If you did get PG this cycle, DH would be away for the first 6 months of the pregnancy but will be able to come home and see you fully pregnant! He would be able to experience the pregnancy with you and be around for the most important part- your child's birth. If you aren't pregnant, then like the other poster mentioned, you are going to have to wait 6 months to TTC again. It will be ok and you will be given only as much as you can handle. Even if you don't think you can handle it on your own for 6 months, you'll realize you have that inner strength and you will use that strength to become a great mother.

hopeful:) · February 2010

Ugh, your situation sounds pretty tough. I know it can seem impossible, but perhaps you can take advantage of the next 6 months and do something that you normally wouldn't have time to do with a spouse at home. Learn Italian? Travel? Volunteer? Go out solo and establish a friend base/support system? I wish you all the best.

Mrs.Umm · February 2010

((HUGS)) I don't have any more advice than PPs have already given, but just wanted to offer my support.

supernic · February 2010

Thanks everyone for the kind words. I wish I could have written back sooner but things have been crazy (as I'm sure you could imagine) trying to get everything taken care of before he leaves. I don't know what I'll do while he's gone. I was working at a school but I got so sick all the time from the kids that I just couldn't keep doing it. I have been through a deployment once before, but we were just married and we hadn't even combined our houses yet. I was working in my home town and living with a roommate and it was still tough then, but this feels like it will be so much worse. Maybe it's just the memories of the last one hitting me early. Maybe it won't be like the first time, I don't know. I will survive. Chin up!

Want a personalized experience?

how am I going to get through this? (long)

Re: how am I going to get through this? (long)

Choose Another Board

Search Boards