Our beautiful son is here! Just not in the way we expected...(LONG)

I was so excited to have a natural birth using hypnobirthing...it didn't work out the way I wanted it to, but in the end, we have our little sweetheart and I know we did the best we could...here's our story. 

I was at 41 weeks and getting nervous that my doctor was going to begin pressuring me to induce soon...I just didn't want to have that discussion.  I had been having BH for a while and they were becoming stronger and stronger and I was hoping to go into labor by the weekend....DH and I were doing everything we could to induce naturally (red raspberry leaf tea, sex, long walks) and finally on Friday afternoon, I began having actual contractions. 

FRIDAY 2:00-8:00pm
They began at about 7 minutes apart, and I was thrilled.  It was amazing to finally be able to use my hypnobirthing techniques...A contraction would begin and I would start to get scared and it would be really painful, and then I would remember what to do and they pain would completely go away!  (at the beginning, at least....not later on!)

FRIDAY 8:00pm - SATURDAY 11:00am
DH had been up the previous 2 nights b/c of work, so he was sleeping.  At 8pm, contractions all of a sudden jumped to every 3 minutes and got much stronger, so I woke him up.  He began packing for the hospital while I called the doula.  (Don't get me started on the fact that we weren't packed yet!!)  I told the doula that things had started and we would call her when we needed her.   By midnight, I was soooo tired and I didn't feel like I was that far along yet.  DH convinced me to come to bed and try to sleep between contractions.  This helped a lot, but it slowed things down and by the morning they were really really far apart again.  However, I was well-rested.  We went for a walk and contractions started up again, 7 minutes apart. 

SATURDAY 11:00am - 8:00pm
Contractions went steadily from 7 to 6 to 5 minutes apart as DH did hip compression for me, played me music, and reminded me to try different positions when I got too uncomfortable.  I called the doula and explained that things had picked back up again and said that we would call her in a few hours....I got in the shower, which felt wonderful, but it accelerated my contractions and we called the doula back in a matter of minutes to come right away.  It turned into a rather mellow afternoon on the couch with DH and the doula bringing me ice, talking to me softly and encouraging me.  Around 7:30, I had been having contractions 3 minutes apart for about an hour and we decided to go to the hospital. 

SATURDAY 8:00pm - SUNDAY 7:00am
At the hospital, horrible news: I was only 2 cm.  I couldn't believe it.  I tried to fight back the tears, but I was soooo disappointed.  They told me that if I wanted to continue on naturally, they recommended that I go home.  We sent the doula home to get some sleep and told her we would call her when we needed her again.  On the way home, I lost it.  I started crying hysterically,  I totally lost my focus and the contractions became absolutely unbearable?.they were now 2 minutes apart.  I got in the tub and DH just sat with me and held my hand, played music, and read to me.  At this point, though, I was in absolute agony.  At 3:00am, he called the doula to come back and she sent him to bed (thank god, the poor guy!).  For 3 hours she just continuously refilled the tub with hot water and poured water over my belly and talked to me in a low voice.  The contractions started to piggyback, coming one after another with no break in between.  Around 6:00 am, she suggested I get out of the tub to see if I could get more comfortable in another position.  Outside of the tub was pretty painful though and I was crying again.  At this point, she gently suggested that I might think about how we might proceed?.She didn?t say it, but I knew she meant maybe getting an epi.  I said that I?d like to go back to the hospital and see how far along I was?I was really really hoping that I was 8 cm or something and wouldn?t have much farther to go, but I knew that was a long shot.  We woke DH and headed back in.  The bad news: I was still at 2 cm.  Unbelievable.  At this point, I had been having contractions for 41 hours and I was exhausted?.and there was no end in sight.  I told them that I thought I would like an epidural, which I knew would also mean pitocin.  Again, the disappointment was really hard to take, especially with the sleep deprivation on top of it.  (I had a lot of people in my life who were not supportive of my decision to go natural, so on top of everything else, I was picturing them gloating over the fact that it didn?t work?sigh.)

SUNDAY 7:00am ? 10:00pm
I was admitted, put in a L&D room, and given the epidural.  I was so relieved to have the pain go away and I started to come to terms with the course this delivery had taken.  They began the pitocin and DH and sat back to wait?.he slept and I rested.  Four hours later I had progressed to 4 cm and my water broke on its own.  I was so relieved that SOMEthing had happened naturally!  The nurse predicted that we would have a baby before midnight.  They came back to check me in another 4 hours and?.still 4 cm.  Meaning that 8 hours of full-blast pitocin had gotten me exactly 2 cm further along than I had been more than 24 hours before.  Again: devastated.  However, there was really nothing to be done?.the options were: c-section now or wait for 24 hours and do a c-section then if the baby hadn?t come yet.  I really didn?t want to be on an epidural that long, so I made the decision to have it done right then.  DH was by my head while little Adam was born?Before they even announced that he was out, I heard his cry!  He had strong lungs from the very beginning!  DH was with them while they weighed and measured and cleaned him up, and then he brought our little guy around the curtain for me to see?It was torture to just have to lie there not being able to hold him until they stitched me up?.but finally I was out of surgery and into the recovery room and got to hold my little one. 

In the end, I don?t regret anything about the way we did things?I tried as hard as I could to do things naturally and I?m proud of how long I made it?I also know that the decision to get meds and eventually do the c-section were right for me.  In the end, one week later, it?s so much less important to me how he got here because HE?S HERE and beautiful and sweet and fun and I can?t stop holding him and kissing him!!