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MIL Vent... Why does she always have to undermine us???

aknjcpaknjcp
in Parenting

So I really shouldn't be surprised anymore... But jeez. I am SO aggravated.

Around the holidays, MIL was complaining how she wanted to get DD a Zhu Zhu pet. I told her not to worry about it - DD is still young (doesn't turn 3 til 2/13) and has no conception of what they are. DD also still puts things in her mouth once and a while and DH and I don't feel comfortable with her having a Zhu Zhu since they found the higher levels of antimony - especially if DD decides she wants to try and have Mr. Squiggles for a snack. 

MIL completely waved us off. She said that if there was any reason for concern there would be a recall and we were just paranoid and unreasonable. Well, she couldn't get one after all, thankfully. It did peeve me that she continued to try even though we told her we didn't want DD to have one, though.

Well, MIL emails me today. She said that she bought DD her b-day gifts and will be sending them down to us this week (she thankfully lives out of state). Low and behold, one of the items she got is the friggin' Zhu Zhu hamster. She is coming to visit next month and went on to say that she is looking forward to seeing Audrey play with it.

ARRRGH! WTH?!? Nothing DH and I ever say to his parents is good enough. We are always the "dumb kids" who don't know what the hell we are talking about. Why is it that as Audrey's mother and father we get no respect. If I don't want my daughter to have a toy, it should end at that.

UGH. Sorry so long - I am just soooo furious. I'd normally turn right around and sell it or donate it - but she is coming to visit and DH thinks we should make her happy and let Audrey play with it just when she comes.  

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Re: MIL Vent... Why does she always have to undermine us???

  • amiseripamiserip member
    I don't like your MIL.  She is treating both of you with disrespect by disregarding your feelings and opinion as your child's parents.  If you have the guts, I would get rid of the toy and tell her you didn't want your child playing with it, not just because you obvi feel strongly about your daughter not playing with it, but also to prove a point to your MIL that you and DH call the shots, not her.  DH needs to get on board with this though.  But by your comment about just letting her play with it to make MIL happy, I doubt he will be on board.  GL!
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  • cutekissis101cutekissis101
    omg this is how my mother in law is she told me i was crazy because i wouldn't use a used car seat especially if had been in a wreck. WTH?! and told me that i was just being paranoid for not wanting to use a decorative bumper.
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  • teamsweetteamsweet member
    Yikes - you definitely have a MIL problem but you also have a dh problem.  If he's not on board, your mil will continue to undermine you (because he lets her).  You guys have to stand up for yourselves together otherwise, it'll only get worse.  And imo, he needs to stand up to her.
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  • goodheartedmommygoodheartedmommy member

    Let it go. Yikes! What's with this place this morning? I was expecting something way different than this.

    I'm going to assume this is just the tip of the iceberg. But learn to pick your battles (and this is coming from someone who needs to learn to do the same with her MIL--splenda? Sprite on paci?). Hopefully there's more to the story since you're freaking out about a toy...but really, you have to let things go. My almost 3 year old would be just fine with a zhu zhu pet.

    Ask yourself if it's worth the fight. And thanks for posting this! It made me realize how crazy I sound when I vent about my MIL.

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  • Corinne13Corinne13
    Do you have a dog?  Your dog could have accidently have had the zhu zhu pet as a snack by March :)
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  • DandelionMomDandelionMom

    Put the zhu zhu away until she's older.  This is so not a hill I'd die on. 

    Pretty sure that the day after those reports it was found that the pets didn't contain that chemical. 

    But we found out that they aren't great for kids with long hair (those little wheels tangle right up in the hair and you have to cut it out).

    .
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  • ValAndRyanValAndRyan
    I don't think the toy is the actual issue its the fact that you told your MIL that you are not comfortable with your daughter having this toy and she got it anyway. Since she did get the toy anyway, I'd put it away and if she asks where it is when she visits, let her know that you already told her that you didn't want your daughter to have it before and you don't know why she got it and that it is away for now till she's a little older. Your DH also needs to back you up on this. Tell her from now on you'd appreciate it if she would listen to you and your husband so she doesn't waste her money.
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  • hopefulmomhopefulmom member
    I would do as your DH says and as soon as she leaves put it up.  That is ridiculous that she went and bought it knowing you and your DH's feelings about it.  She has no respect for you.  If she wanted one so bad she could have still bought it and then given it to her next year...kwim?
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