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3rd Trimester
missyjg
member
Push Present?
missyjg
member
Did I miss something? What is a push present? I asked people around me and no one has ever heard of this but I see it posted here quite a bit! And what do you typically get? I'm SOL b/c DH is deployed but right now being able to have DH there for the birth would be the best present for me. Thanks!
TTC since 6/2003. m/c 9/14/03 8 weeks, 5 chemical pregnancies, mmc 6/04 12 weeks, Michael born sleeping 5/25/05 at 22weeks always our angel, fought ovarian cancer and won, m/c 4/06 5.2 weeks and 7/07 6.6 weeks,Our Miracle baby girl born 4/8/10,mc 12/18/11 at 5.3 weeks, BFP 10/26/12 dating u/s on 11/8/12 showing a strong heartbeat!EDD July 4,2013. RCS on 6/27. Baby boy in NICU for 8 long and scary days before he was able to come home. We are now a happy family of 4
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Re: Push Present?
They've become big in some areas, but they aren't really the norm. Its a gift for giving birth. NMS at all. We won't be doing it.
But many are really into it. I wouldn't worry about not getting one though.
A keepsake IMO is different than a push present.
the idea behind it is that it is sort of like a gift for all your hardwork in child-bearing and pushing, hence the name. but in all actuality its something that you can either take or leave. Not a necessity, but a nice gesture from dad to mom. My hubby sort of inadvertently planned a push present. He bought me a Chamilia bracelet (like Pandora) with a motherhood charm and said that once baby Elijah comes he will get me a birthstone charm...since Im due first of February there was no way for him to know when E would be coming...could be end of January or February. So anyway, the birthstone charm will sort of be my push present.
I hope for you, that your DH will be there with you! I think that would most definitely be the greatest gift of all...not just for you but for him as well as Im sure he is wanting to be there for you and to greet his LO as soon as possible. *fingerscrossed*
Na not worried at all! Was more curiosity than anything! But it sounds like a very cute tradition.
TTC since 6/2003. m/c 9/14/03 8 weeks, 5 chemical pregnancies, mmc 6/04 12 weeks, Michael born sleeping 5/25/05 at 22weeks always our angel, fought ovarian cancer and won, m/c 4/06 5.2 weeks and 7/07 6.6 weeks,Our Miracle baby girl born 4/8/10,mc 12/18/11 at 5.3 weeks, BFP 10/26/12 dating u/s on 11/8/12 showing a strong heartbeat!EDD July 4,2013. RCS on 6/27. Baby boy in NICU for 8 long and scary days before he was able to come home. We are now a happy family of 4
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We didn't call it a "push present", but DH did get me a ring with DD's birthstone that I will have forever and will give to her when she is older. I think it's a really nice idea when it's a keepsake type of thing with some meaning.
DH gave me a beautiful ring with DS's birthstone - which he said was from DS - and he also gave me a circle diamond necklace which was from him. I have never referred to either as push presents but the thought was the same I guess...
DH is a gift/jewlery giver so it was not out of character for him to give me these gifts and I cherish them!
My push present is not as romantic as jewelry... I'm getting a treadmill!!! Of course, it's for both of us to use, as we both need it!
Ditto! DH couldn't wait. I got a diamond and aquamarine ring. I call it my "hush present" because for the last few weeks DH has come home to find me in a mess of hormonal tears.
Edited to add: I think it's funny that people have such strong opinions about "push presents." If DH wanted to buy me something simply because it's Saturday then no one would have an adverse opinion. No one would say, "isn't the present that you woke up alive and breathing?"
I never heard of a "push present" either until the bump. DH plans on bringing me an ice cold beer, so I'm going with that.
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If he spent a lot of money on me after we agreed NOT to spend money on that, yes I would be upset. That would mean he went behind my back and made a large purchase that we had agreed, as a couple, wasn't appropriate. But, I know him and he would never do that.
But we tend to not do material gifts in general for things. We don't give each other christmas gifts or Vday gifts, for example. We either do experiences or write each other notes about how we feel. So, I could see him making me a card or something along those lines.
I don't like the term push present, I think it's kinda gross.
Motherhood or maternity gifts are nothing new- I think that the term push present became popular though and people pay more attention to it. A good friend of our family is an older jeweler and he said that there are typically 3-4 instances when a husband buys his wife a nice piece of jewelry- if you count the engagement ring as 1, then 2nd piece sometimes as a wedding gift, 3rd is for the birth of a child, 4 is major anniversaries.
My dad got my mom a sapphire eternity band when I was born and she always wore it alongside her wedding set, when my brother was born he bought her a nice antique emerald ring (which is my birthstone) because he couldn't afford such a piece when I was born and my brother's birthstone is garnet.
In the 2 months around my DD's birth we bought a new car & went to contact on a single family home, so trinkets & baubles weren't really in the budget, but I wouldn't be surprised if I got a pair of earrings (one for DD and one for the new baby.)
I do agree with you Irish, that if DH went behinf my back and spent a lot of money on it I would be mad. This is because we have made our budget together and a large item that isn't planned for would mess the budget up. If it were something small, flowers or an inexpensive keepsake of somesort I would think it would be fine.
I do not have a problem with push presents or the Dads buying them. I think it is ridiculous when women expect large gifts given to them. I know they went through a lot, but is the LO not considered a gift for them as well? I would rather have a supportive DH throughout the whole pregnancy than a large present at the end. But if finances are stable and DH buys a gift I think it is sweet.
LOL, Dh would say the same thing if I called our camera a push present. I think it was very sweet of DH to do that!
I'll be getting a membership to WW as my push present. LOL
Actually that was my b-day gift last year before I got pregnant. I work at home and we moved recently, so I don't have alot of interaction with adults. The weekly meetings out of the house just for me were the highlight of my week.
LO will be born feb 10th. Between v-day feb 14th and my b-day the 26th, I have plenty of gift receiving events in Feb.
People have been exchanging the equivalent of push presents for the longest time. All of the women with kids in my family, back to my great grandmother, got keepsake jewelry for each of their children - someone just recently came up with a stupid name for it, and some women prefer cars over jewelry, I guess, lol. Like I told my DH, I'd be happy with a margarita snuck into the hospital, but chances are I am getting a piece of jewelry with our son's birthstone.
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Yeah, I just think people get a little silly about it since it has a "cutesy" name now. It's a nice gesture, that's all it is. People should direct their snubbing toward people that just expect to be given something/think they're entitled/get mad if they don't get something fancy, rather than at the notion of whether or not someone's husband makes a nice gesture toward their wives.
Like I said, I don't consider a keepsake a push present. I view them as different things. I realize that keepsakes have been around for awhile and is not new.
I actually see keepsakes as cute and have no problem with them. To me, however, "push present" (since the phrase IS new) represents the new attitude of "I carried your baby so I deserve something for ME !" Think diamond earings (when thats not the babys birth stone) or a new car.
Now if the guy on his own goes out and gets it, thats fine! I don't have ANY problem with that. My issue is only with those who throw fits (and there are women who do that) and demand a gift because they pushed a baby out and deserve to be compensated.
A keepsake, however, is different to me and like I said I find that cute.
Yeah, the name is kind of obnoxious--it makes it sound like "I pushed a baby out of my vag, now give me a necklace, darnit!" Not so classy.
But I think baby keepsakes have been around forever. I know many women my mom's age who have jewelry in their children's birthstones that was given right after birth. My dad got my mom a beautiful gold froggie stickpin. I'm from the South, and it's very normal. My DH is Jewish, and it's essentially expected. Not in a "I just had a baby and expect a present way," but in the same type of way that engagement rings are overwhelmingly common. People just don't even think about it. I think it's a remarkable way to commemorate the day you became a family, not just two people.
PS. DH is getting me a watch. Engraving the back with our LO's name, his birthday, and the time he is born. That way I'll always remember the "time" our lives changed forever. It's such a beautiful idea.