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Forgive, for I have judged.

KeepingItLowKeyKeepingItLowKey
in Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

And honestly... I'm not sure who wouldn't.

I went to a playdate today. First time in this group. The house was filthy... like, they entire carpet had blueberries and other food type items crushed into it. My socks were covered with black spots on the bottom... I really wanted to put my shoes on.

Then the mom changed her son in the living room- poopy diaper. After she took it off, he ran away, poopy butt and all... started digging his hand in the poop and touching the walls and toys before sitting on the carpet and leaving a nice brown poop spot. No one did anything about it... I was kind of grossed out.

And another boy kept hitting DD. Like, BEATING her with drumsticks and smacking her head and she was so shocked and couldn't stop crying... she sat on this little couch and he came over and grabbed her neck to push her off. I tried to make sure she stayed far away, but he kept finding her.

It all made me scared if I have a boy... boys aren't all this rowdy, right?

Anyway, was I being stuck up or did I have a right to be put off??


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Re: Forgive, for I have judged.

  • azaretskyazaretsky member

    I wouldn't call that 'judging', I'd say that you have a good self-preservation instinct. I hope you aren't going to bring your DD back into that house. How odd that some people can live and raise their kids like this. I'm all about being laid back, but there's 'laid back' and then there is filth and poop on the carpet. I don't know. I guess I'm judging too.

    And by the way, while this boy was hitting your DD, what was his mom doing?

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  • kelbriankelbrian

    You have a right to be put off.

    That is called crappy parenting right there and lack of responsibility.  

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  • Northwest_JennNorthwest_Jenn
    Whoa! Gross. I would hae hightailed it out of there as quickly as I could. Did the other moms seem like they thought it was weird?
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  • tmp-354536812503300tmp-354536812503300
    I have a boy and he's a boy, he likes to run, jump, knock stuff down but he knows better than to hit other people. And even if he did, I know better than to let him keep doing it.
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  • busygalbusygal member

    Eeew. That's awful!

    I don't think that's anything to do with boys though. That is just due to being raised like a wild animal/in a barn/by a pack of wolves/insert whatever your mother told you people would think of you if you did anything half as bad as this stuff!

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  • KeepingItLowKeyKeepingItLowKey

    The mom kept saying "sorry, he's a hitter" and then made him hug her. But it didn't stop him from doing it again...

    FWIW DD hits too when she's frustrated, but she has only hit me or inanimate objects- and usually does it when she hears the word no. She actually plays quite nice with other kids, so she was just really surprised that someone would just do that to her for no reason...?


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  • rachirachi

    imageAudreyGolightly:
    I have a boy and he's a boy, he likes to run, jump, knock stuff down but he knows better than to hit other people. And even if he did, I know better than to let him keep doing it.

    She took the words right out of my mouth!

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  • JoyousJuliaJoyousJulia member
    If it were me, I wouldn't go back to that playgroup again. Being a boy is no excuse for being rowdy. Not all boys are that way at all. It drives me nuts when moms think they can let their kids get away with stuff like that. Playgroup should be a chance for kids to learn how to mediate themselves. Those moms need to step it up and intervene with stuff like that.
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  • amstepamstep member
    eww.  sanitize yourself and dd and don't go back!
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  • J+OJ+O
    I will admit my little guy is very aggressive... I have to keep an eye on him at all times, he jumps into people's arms, pushes and hits.  I tell him no and sometimes hold his hand when I say it.  I also remove him from the group too if he's too out of hand.

    The poop thing and food on the floor sticking to your socks is gross no matter what way you look at it. 
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  • carolinagcarolinag member

    i would never return. and i would have left once i saw how gross it was. i would have faked a stomach ache or something. 

    and the hitting thing blows my mind. that kid is going to grow up to be a total punk if no one is teaching him how to behave. 

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  • faBriezyfaBriezy member
    That's just gross K. The dirty floor, the poop. Where did you find these people? ;) and ditto to pp. DS is all boy. Runs, jumps, climbs. His bear hugs might knock you over and might shove you into the kitchen for a cracker. But he has never hit or bitten anyone aggressively.
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  • userdeleteduserdeleted member

    The poop thing is disgusting.DS hates being changed and tries very hard to get away, and still that has never ever happened to me. Plus you would think if he was the type of kid who makes a run for it during diaper changes she'd take him somewhere else to do a dirty one. I would have been horrified, lol!

    The hitting sounds pretty bad too. DS can be kind of aggressive, but it's in a "friendly" way - he's trying to say hi he's just not that great at it, lol. This kid sounds like he was really trying to hurt her. Sad.

    I wouldn't be going back if I were you. 

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  • JAC1027JAC1027
    Gross!  I have no tolerance for filth. Sounds like my SIL's house.  There was so much food on the floor I was killing ants sitting at her kitchen table.  She doesn't clean up the high chair after meals and there will be food all around.  So gross and unnecessary.  And the poop thing?  I would have had to say something.  THERE'S POOP ON YOUR CARPET!
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  • KeepingItLowKeyKeepingItLowKey

    Thanks for letting me complain ladies. I didn't really say anything since I had just met them... but I just kept thinking "man, I really never feel like my house is clean but I am immaculate compared to this..." and I normally wouldn't think poorly of someone with a messy house but this was DIRTY. And everyone saw the poop and no one seemed upset or grossed out! It was so weird.

    I didn't mean to make people feel bad about the hitting since I know babies hit- but it was disturbing to watch her get smacked and HURT (she even got a busted/bloody upper lip) with little remorse. I'm glad it's okay to judge poopy homes.

    Also, I'm not sure if it's just me, but I don't change poopy diapers out in the open in front of guests if there are other rooms to do it in...?


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  • meggiekinsmeggiekins
    I'd judge you if you didn't judge that.
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