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Help?

KateySueKateySue
in Adoption

We got word this evening that a young lady from our church is pregnant with her second child. She has an 18-month old daughter and was living with one of our friends...now will be moving in with our friend's parents (the wife is my husband's co-worker at church).

As of today, this gal's plan is adoption and of course, we are very interested in talking to her about our desire to adopt. We want to be sensitive to her needs/wants and emotions but at the same time, we want to make our desire known sooner than later. An added factor is that the in-laws of the family that she will be living with have adopted two children and might be interested in adoption this baby as well....do we hang back and see how things play out or do we pursue the possibility? We don't want to step on any toes and we feel that this situation is especially sensitive because we all attend church together...and my husband works on staff with the lady who is taking in the birth mom.

Help? What would you do/say? How on earth do we approach this? 

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Re: Help?

  • Amy720Amy720

    I agree that this is a very sticky situation.  I would talk to the girl about her plans and also to the couple that she is staying with.  If she is newly pregnant, I would definitely give her some time.  A lot of agencies won't even let birth mothers make an adoption plan and seek out adoptive parents until the 7th-8th month of pregnancy because they feel the birth mother needs all that time to come to a decision that's right for her and her baby.

    I would just continue to be there for her and support her and let her have someone to lean on.  If this is the baby for you, then God will work it out. 

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  • MayDayGirlMayDayGirl member

    honestly I wouldn't talk to her about it. I would have someone she feels comfortable with mention you guys, but she might feel put on the spot, or like you are being pushy, or just plain uncomfortable around you afterward.  especially if she decided to have another family adopt the baby.

    Good luck.

    Married on 3.20.2004. It took 30 month, 2 failed adoptions and IVF for our first miracle. We have had 9 foster kids since he was born and started the domestic adoption process when he was 10 month old, we had 4 failed matches in that time. After our daughter was born we brought her home and spent 2 weeks fearing we might lose her because of complications that came up. But Praise God all went through and she is ours forever! Expecting again after IVF Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Pregnancy Ticker Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers image
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  • KateySueKateySue
    Thanks for the input! We are praying!
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  • WinWedWinWed
    Good luck!!
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