If you EBF, does YH help out overnight?

MrsV092207 · January 2010

MH thinks he's Superman if he so much as changes a diaper and goes back to bed. I know he can't feed her but since she still wakes up 2-3 times at night, I'm exhausted.... if YH helps out, what does he do? How long does he stay up?

kimmie321 · January 2010

Nope all on me. Grrr...

He does get him on the weekends on his final morning wake so I can sleep in.

haleymay18 · January 2010

He'll get up and warm a bottle to give dd. Then he'll rock her back to sleep or pat her back or whatever he can do to get her down. If he takes a nighttime waking then he does the same thing I do sans the boob

KandM05 · January 2010

lol, your superman comment is funny! I'm pretty lucky. My husband helps out overnight alot. Infact, he usually goes and gets my LO when and brings him to me, then I feed him (in bed) and then my Husband swaddles him and puts him back. So we both participate each wakening. My husband is the master swaddler though, so thats how our process came about......i cant seem to swaddle very well. We are now trying to sleep train though, so we are trying to get out of the habit of feeding him everytime he wakes. My Lo's doc recommended that my husband be the one to soothe LO back to sleep, so LO cant smell me and ask for food.......so, now my husband really is goign to have to do lots more than me at night. But, he seems down for it.....we'll see how long it lasts!

jnk062602 · January 2010

Not on his own. If I hit a wall he will get up and thaw a bottle, but it is once or twice a month. Last night I had her down finally at 11, then she was up at 12, 1:15, 2am, and 3:30. And then I had to wake up at 6 to make it to the dr b4 work today. If vtonight goes the same way I will be waking him up for one of them.

amos07 · January 2010

My DD rarely gets up anymore and if she does it's usually only once around 5 am. When she was getting up multiple times a night my DH would warm up a bottle and feed her, change her and put her back to sleep for at least one of the feedings. When it got down to once in the middle of the night he would change her and bring her to me to feed. He has helped out since the beginning and usually stays up with me to burp her for me while I am nursing.

egsquared · January 2010

DH helps out a lot overnight. He's a night owl by nature, so when DD wakes up anytime before midnight, he's usually still up anyway. If she doesn't need to eat, DH will take care of her. If we're both sleeping, we'll trade off nights where we're the one up with her, so at least one person gets some decent sleep. For instance, just now, he woke me up at 5:45 to feed her but said she'd been up every 1-2 hours all night long. I had no idea she was up so much - I slept from 11pm-5:45am. If DD goes through the same thing tonight and is up every hour, it'll be my turn to be up with her.

beckytr · January 2010

my dh gets annoyed if i asked him to change a diaper b/c i am already up. he will help put ds back to sleep if it is taking a long time. my friend's husband gets up, changes the baby and brings her to my friend in bed then he gets up and puts their daughter down in the crib when she's done eating - my friend never gets out of bed!

eta: ds' pooping has slowed down so i rarely change his diaper in the middle of the night anymore.

AppleMomma · January 2010

DH helped me out last night, only because I've been feeling under the weather. Usually it's all me.

sophabelle · January 2010

yes he helps out when he hears ds cry. he wants me to wake him up for diaper changes but usually i let him sleep bc he works and i stay home. but if ds is having a rough night he gets up and helps sooth ds. i think he helps a lot.

alita1 · January 2010

I EBF... for the first two months DH did all the night time diaper changes... he recently started doing the first night time diaper change (around 12-1am) which helps a lot.

hellopoppyseed · January 2010

Nope never. All me all the time. I think if I asked he would come but idk what he would do.

fairychick77 · January 2010

Yes he helps out. If J gets up multiple times in a night we will switch off. He rarely eats if he does get up. If I was a SAHM, I would take more of the responsibility but we both work full-time.

whirli · January 2010

My DH helps out once in a while if she's inconsolable and I'm stressed. Normally I just nurse her back to sleep. I SAH so I can always nap during the day so I don't expect DH to help much at night.

GeneGoddess · January 2010

Our night-time routine: I feed, he changes the diaper. Sometimes I feel sorry for him and if he has a big day at work or a long drive, I'll take a diaper change or two. But we both work FT, so this doesn't happen often.

nikkinack1 · January 2010

All me, DH only helped the first week because I had a c-section.

AutumnBride929 · January 2010

Uhh, I bottle feed and DH has NEVER helped me overnight. He thinks he's superman if he changes a diaper during the DAYTIME. lol Maybe it's not that bad but... yeah I'm DS' primary caregiver and DH is my occasional assistant, basically.

mari_gold · January 2010

He will if I ask him to. On particularly bad nights, I'll have him go check Zack's diaper, swaddle him and pop a pacifier in, to see if that will take care of the crying. (It rarely does.)

He's happy to help, but I usually have to wake him up. At that point we're both up, so I usually just go take care of the baby myself -- no point in both us losing out on sleep.

blushingbrideoct07 · January 2010

Dh used to help when DD woke up more than once a night and we would change her diaper at each feeding. ?I would feed her and he would change her. ?Now that she is up once a night he sleeps through the whole feeding. ?

rpm2009 · January 2010

Yes - almost every time. He is also in charge of the soothing back to sleep. He will respond to crying, change DS if necessary and then sit with me while I nurse. We have talked about him staying in bed but he refuses. It is strange but we have had some of our best conversations sitting in the dark whispering while I feed DS.

AfterAll · January 2010

When we first got home, he did all the diapers, and got the baby for me so I didn't have to get out of bed. When DS got up 1-2 times in the middle of the night, he would do one feeding for me.

He would always offer to help, but I told him to go back to sleep (unless I really, really needed help) because he had to get up for work in the morning.

nmr79 · January 2010

I do the night care. DH doesn't hear her , and I would have to wake him up to handle it anyway, so it's not worth the hassle. He does get up with her when she stirs around 6 if it's a day I'm not working, so I can sleep for a couple of hours.

TashaLee · January 2010

Sometimes, but it's usually me. She doesn't wake every night but when she does I'm the first one to get up and I'll go change her and feed her, and then if she has trouble settling and is fussy DH will get up and take her and try and get her back to sleep. He helps out more on the weekend, but I honestly usually try and let him sleep during the week because I know he's tired and stressed out from work. And at least I can grab a nap during the day if I really need it. He's great when he gets home from work though, he's a big help in the evenings.

ALittleBirdy · January 2010

No b/c I don't change his diaper at night and other than feeding him and rocking for a few min there's nothing else to do. It'd be pointless to get DH up when I have to be up anyway. The only exception is if DS is wide awake and I can't get him back down, then I might ask for help.

SanFran80 · January 2010

Nah. No need. DD nurses for 10 mins with her eyes closed and then goes right back to sleep.

heatherlane · January 2010

Before I returned to work, I did it all. He started taking Friday nights about 6-8 weeks in, but I would pump and he would do the nighttime routine so that I could do what I wanted (and have a drink.)

Now he does Fri-Sun. Basically, he gets up, changes him if necessary, and brings him to me to nurse in bed. Then DH is responsible again for getting him back to sleep after nursing. It's a non-issue most nights, but we try to help each other out when we can. Like, if he wakes up early and I know he's probably not hungry (like before 2AM, even on "my" nights) DH will kindly go put the paci in, turn him over, soothe him, whatever so that he doesn't smell boobies. He will only come and get me if it seems like it's going to take more than 5 mins to get him back to sleep.

jackie.couturier · January 2010

DH is the only one in our house sleeping through the night. We bedshare (save your flames... it works for us) so DS nurses in the sidelying position and then we fall back asleep. Since we stopped changing his diaper in the middle of the night (around 3 months) no one even gets out of bed.

PediNurse03 · January 2010

Nope! Grrrr! I certainly didn't mind in the first few months, I was still on the new baby high and never even felt tired. Ever! Things are starting to catch up with me now though!

He has gotten up with him once in the middle of the night. It is aggravating, but he works full time (up at 7am) and I only work 2-3 days a week. Besides, there's not a whole lot he can do, he doesn't lactate! I think it's kinda pointless for him to wake up, go get him out of his crib and bring him to me if I already have to be awake to feed him. No point in us both being sleep deprived! Definitely not easy though!

Temp67694062501186 · January 2010

My husband has always stayed up with me. There were a few times in the beginning where we would trade off - I'd take an hour nap, while he was up with her, then he'd wake me when she was ready to nurse and he would na while I nursed her, then we'd repeat the cycle.

But now, LO STTN - however she often wont go down until 1 or 2am (this is a new development and I have no idea how to fix it...). DH will stay up with me while she is awake and we go to bed together once she goes down.

MommyandKate · January 2010

whirli:
My DH helps out once in a while if she's inconsolable and I'm stressed. Normally I just nurse her back to sleep. I SAH so I can always nap during the day so I don't expect DH to help much at night.

This. I wake up faster (before DH) when she cries, and I can console her faster, so it's all around faster if I deal with it and then go back to bed. Maybe this will change when I go back to work in a couple weeks, but for now it's always me unless I hit a wall and ask for help.

SportyMrs.23 · January 2010

I am very lucky...DH gets up with me every single time that DD wakes up (granted, she usually only wakes once a night...but in the beginning when she was up 3-4+, he still woke up every time).

He gets up and grabs the diapers and wipes for me and I change and feed her...he usually either plays on his itouch while I do this or he cleans up the kitchen or gets his clothes ready for the next day work.....after I am done feeding her, I hand her off to DH who swaddles her, burps her and rocks her back to sleep. While he is doing this, I usually go to the bathroom, play on my itouch or get some other things done.

It's really nice having him up with me while I am feeding and having him help with putting her down...I don't feel alone in the night time process.

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