Widowed Parents

RoseandLevi · January 2010

I just wanted to tell you to make sure you talk about your DH or DW to your kids when they are gone. It doesn't matter how little your children were when there parent left they need to know about them. Even if you didn't have a good relationship with them. Later in life they will wish that you talked to them if you didn't when they were growing up.

I'm not a single parent or a widow. I lost my father when I was 9 months old and my mother never talked about him my entire life. I saw his family once or twice a year and now that I'm older having a child I wish I knew what he was like. What my parents relationship was really like. I know what my dad's family has told me threw the years but that's it. Please talk to your children.

I know that most of you will talk to your children without me having to say anything. I just wanted you to know that your kids really want to know. And don't be afraid to tell them the good and the bad.

cmrand4 · January 2010

I agree with this. I lost my father when I was five. Having just a few memories of him, the stories my mom and grandmother told me were precious to me in my growing up years and now too. And yes, tell the good with the bad--It makes a whole real person for the child to know. I wish my mom would have kept more momentos for me and my sister to have but my parents were young and my father's death was unexpected. Simple things like a driver's license become so priceless to children who lose their parents. Listening to my mother talk about my father when I was growing up are some of my fondest memories-some tears and some laughter too.

FSUSammy · January 2010

Thanks! I plan on it. I told my DH that he'd never have to worry about our DS not knowing what a fantastic father he was. He was so worried that our DS would grow old and hate him, like he hated his father because he left when he was 2 but because of choice, totally not like my DH. So I plan on telling him every day how he had such a great daddy.

mwallon51040 · January 2010

I agree. I keep a journal. anytime i have a memory of him, which is multiple times a day, I write it down. I have asked others in his family to do the same too. they will periodically send me stories to put in the book. I also have a chest for all of his things so baby can have it when he is old enough.

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