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Appropriate age for training bra?

CurlyQ284CurlyQ284 member
in Blended Families

Over the summer, BM packed training bras in SDs suitcase.  She's EIGHT.  She said to make sure SD wears them because "she's growing a little something there".  I definitely see nothing and we let SD dress herself, when she doesn't want to wear something, she makes a tent out of a blanket and tries to sneak stuff (like putting shorts under a dress, I saw her and said "you don't HAVE to wear a dress!) She made her tent and I came in to tell her breakfast is ready and she was sneaking an undershirt on.  I didn't comment, just let her wear the undershirt because I think it's NUTS.

We just saw them recently, and now the SEVEN year old has training bras.  SD8 is still sneaking the undershirts, which I don't address because I don't blame her, I hate bras.  AND BM buys them ones with pictures all over them so SD7 had a freak out over the little designs being seen through her shirt.  Is this too young for training bras or am I completely off?  Obviously we're not going to tell BM what to do in her house, we're long distance and it's not hurting them.  DH won't address it at all in our house because he doesn't want to embarass her.  Is it wrong if we don't uphold "the bra" in our house?  Blech. 

In fairness, I am flat chested, BM is NOT so maybe she's anticipating them to have huge knockers like her and is trying to get them used to it?  I have no clue.

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Re: Appropriate age for training bra?

  • sweetie0228sweetie0228 member

    I think my DD started wearing her's in 4th grade.  She had what we lovingly referred to as mosquito bites.  But she was getting self consciencous (?) about what she looked like in shirts.

    My dd also developed early and had her first period in 5th grade.  She's in 7th now and is wearing a C cup.

     

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  • hindsight's_a_biotchhindsight's_a_biotch member

    There is no magic age. It's all about how the child is developing. It doesn't sound like she's developing enough to justify a bra.

    However, I also don't think it damages the kid any to wear a training bra. She'll be fine. I'm personally look on this as one of those my house, my rules type of sitches.

    But I think at your house, you can give her a bra holiday. Sit down with her I think or maybe discuss it in the car. (Car discussions are awesome, btw for those of you who don't know. It's probably the easiest place to talk about anything and get a pretty straight up answer because the seating arrangements make it non confrontational.) Anyhoodle, just tell her that she doesn't have to wear one at your house and she can pick whatever she wants to wear, dresses or pants.



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  • Erin0922Erin0922 member

    I was a B cup at 11, and a D by 13. Now currently DD, and hating every minute. I hated wearing undershirts, so I HAD to wear the bras at a young age. 

    That being said, as long as she truly has nothing to show, and is still comfortable wearing undershirts, I think she's fine. 

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  • hterry85hterry85 member
    It sounds like maybe BM needed them at a younger age, so maybe she just assumes thats a normal age to start. If she doesn't need them, she doesn't need them. Like others said, I'd leave what happens at BMs alone, but I wouldn't make her wear them at your house. As soon as she needs them, she will be well aware, and want to wear them.
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  • SaranSaran member
    I'm over here laughing at myself because I didn't need a bra until I went to high school and then I was in a AA! LOL I didn't get legit breast  until I had my twins! I say if she doesn't have mosquito bites then dont make her wear the bras (your house-your rules).  And when she does start needing them, for goodness sake get the girl some plain white ones so they dont show thru her shirts. What is that woman thinking buying her bras with "geranimals" on them!
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  • OregonMamaOregonMama
    It's definitely based on the child and not on the age.  I would go with whatever you SD is comfortable with at your house.  My dd started wearing them in 4th grade, so she was 9.
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  • CurlyQ284CurlyQ284 member

    imageSaran:
    And when she does start needing them, for goodness sake get the girl some plain white ones so they dont show thru her shirts. What is that woman thinking buying her bras with "geranimals" on them!

    I know!!! I got them clothes for Christmas and they kinda dress complimentary but not matching (so racks with similar clothes, they get different colors etc) I saw cute shirts that came in white and like a charcoal grey color.  I got the grey for SD8 (because of the bra sitch) and SD7 a white one, I thought this through and did it on purpose because of the bra situation.  I got there and SD7 had the animals on her new bras that showed RIGHT THROUGH the new shirt!  GAH!

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  • J&A2008J&A2008 member

    What's the harm in wearing them?  The girls don't like it?

    I started wearing them in fourth grade.  All the other girls were, and by the next year, I needed it.

    Stay at home mom to a house of boys: two amazing stepsons, 12 and 9, and our 4 year old.
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