neeDs a friend to talk to about TTC

V_D_Kat2010 · January 2010

My husband and I have been married for 3 years now and for the last couple months we've officially "started" to TTC, however ever since we've gotten married we've never used any preventive methods from pregnancy - no condoms, BC, nothing. The problem that I currently have is that I do not get a regular cycle, there are some occasions where I will not have a cycle for 3-4 months but if I were to take a test it would say negative. I have not been to a doctor to discuss this with anyone because I currently do not have insurance - and I know you will probably say well if you don't have insurance now, what are you going to do if/when you have a baby, and I know that; however, I feel as though when and if I were to reach that bridge then I will deal with that. The main thing right now that I'm fearful for is the fact that my sister's been TTC for 6 years now and has had no luck. When my mom was pregnant with me, prior to she lost a baby and was on strict bed rest with me in order not to have another miscarriage. I don't know if I will have the same difficulties - though I hope that I won't. I can't really discuss this with anyone I'm close to because both my mom and sister feel as though I have time - that I don't have to worry about it, though some times I feel like my sister just doesn't want me to have a baby before she does. And then all of my friends think I'm too young to be trying-yes I am only 21, but like I said I'm married, with our own house and we both have stable jobs. I just don't know what to do anymore - I want a little one so bad that two nights ago I actually dreamt I was holding my child in my arms

stressedoutMrsS · January 2010

I posted something a few posts down...

i need someone to talk to as well.

Statler and Waldorf · January 2010

I know you don't want to be lectured about not having insurance, but I would really wait. What if something went wrong and you needed to have a D&C early in your pregnancy? Not to mention the costs of prenatal care. That's not even birth related expenses.

I have had irregular cycles all of my life. I was diagnosed with PCOS and I did not ovulate on my own. I have been having success ovulating on a combination of Clomid and Metformin. I was able to get pregnant with my first rather quickly once I got the diagnosis and figured out the right combination of medications. I am currently on my third cycle ttc #2.

I would look into basal body temperture charting to see if you are ovulating. Fertilityfriend.com is a good website to check out. Taking Charge of Your Fertility is a good book to read as well.

ernocs · January 2010

Don't stress out about it. I understand TTC is a "stressful" but extremely fun experience. But when you worry and stress it makes it worse. Now...I am like you. My cycle's are few and far between. In fact there was a 16 month period about 6 yrs ago that I didn't even have one period. They told me that I had PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome). This, of course isn't necessarily what you have, you won't truly know until you go to the dr. and get tested for it. And I swear I'm not trying to freak you out or stress you out anymore then necessary. But here's the upside to my story. They told me for years that I would have to go through infertility treatments in order to even get pregnant. Without any help (and putting the fun back into the sex part of TTC...LOL!) and 6 yrs later, I'm 32 weeks pregnant with my first child. It's a miracle...and miracle's do happen.

Also...on the insurance thing. I didn't have any either when I first got pregnant. There are insurance's out there that will cover pregnancies after a year of coverage. I did get on an insurance plan that covers pregnancy right from the get go, and they knew I was pregnant when they started the coverage (the insurance company is Cinergy). You can also look into your states medical (medicad) health plan. I did it in Arizona, and I was approved to get on it, once again...they knew I was pregnant. So don't fret on the insurance thing, it will happen.

On to the family thing...don't worry about what they want. This is your life. If you want a child, no matter your age is, go for it. You have to do what's right by you and not what's right for your family or anyone else.

V_D_Kat2010 · January 2010

Statler and Waldorf:
I know you don't want to be lectured about not having insurance, but I would really wait. What if something went wrong and you needed to have a D&C early in your pregnancy? Not to mention the costs of prenatal care. That's not even birth related expenses.
I have had irregular cycles all of my life. I was diagnosed with PCOS and I did not ovulate on my own. I have been having success ovulating on a combination of Clomid and Metformin. I was able to get pregnant with my first rather quickly once I got the diagnosis and figured out the right combination of medications. I am currently on my third cycle ttc #2.
I would look into basal body temperture charting to see if you are ovulating. Fertilityfriend.com is a good website to check out. Taking Charge of Your Fertility is a good book to read as well.

Hey - I know about the insurance thing - but I always felt like if I needed it then I would bring my self to get it - at the moment I don't - even though I feel like I should be getting regular check ups but regardless - thanks for the advice On the website and the book - I'll be sure to check it out.

V_D_Kat2010 · January 2010

ernocs:
Don't stress out about it. I understand TTC is a "stressful" but extremely fun experience. But when you worry and stress it makes it worse. Now...I am like you. My cycle's are few and far between. In fact there was a 16 month period about 6 yrs ago that I didn't even have one period. They told me that I had PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome). This, of course isn't necessarily what you have, you won't truly know until you go to the dr. and get tested for it. And I swear I'm not trying to freak you out or stress you out anymore then necessary. But here's the upside to my story. They told me for years that I would have to go through infertility treatments in order to even get pregnant. Without any help (and putting the fun back into the sex part of TTC...LOL!) and 6 yrs later, I'm 32 weeks pregnant with my first child. It's a miracle...and miracle's do happen.

Also...on the insurance thing. I didn't have any either when I first got pregnant. There are insurance's out there that will cover pregnancies after a year of coverage. I did get on an insurance plan that covers pregnancy right from the get go, and they knew I was pregnant when they started the coverage (the insurance company is Cinergy). You can also look into your states medical (medicad) health plan. I did it in Arizona, and I was approved to get on it, once again...they knew I was pregnant. So don't fret on the insurance thing, it will happen.

On to the family thing...don't worry about what they want. This is your life. If you want a child, no matter your age is, go for it. You have to do what's right by you and not what's right for your family or anyone else.

It's so nice to hear some encouraging words, especially since all you hear is negative to the point where you've just stopped talking about it. This morning I found out that my sister has PCOS and now I'm even more worried than before because is it some that heredity where it's something that I may have as well? I feel like I'm running out of options because my husband also told me this morning that he wants to have our first baby this year - I would be so disappointed in myself if I wasn't able to make him happy

doozer1345 · January 2010

In all honesty, insurance doesn't pay for infertility related issues anyways (normally)! The only help we've gotten is b/c I have doc's that will actually bill it as "period problems" or just lab work. have you thought about getting any books to read on TTC? also, stress can help you not get pregnant. there is a magazine called conceieve that i've found is a lot of fun to read. it gives you advice on chilling out, foods to eat, etc.

Also, I understand where you are coming from when it comes to you feeling like your sister doesn't want you to get preg first. My cousin lost 2 about 2 years ago, and even now I feel like with everything me and my DH are going through, she can't be totally happy for me.

Hang in there, and getting as educated as posible really helps with knowing exactly what to do and when, and also making it fun!! good luck!

doozer1345 · January 2010

also....go ahead and start taking a pre-natal. my doc has stressed that to me!

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