Attachment Parenting
Quazel
member
Options
Saw a baby wearing daddy today but didn't have the nerve to say anything
Quazel
member
I was at the grocery store and saw a couple with dad wearing the baby. I wanted to say something positive but I was afraid I wouldn't be able to stop myself from commenting on their bjorn! The baby was adorable and looked perfectly happy though! I momentarily thought about taking a pic with my cell and posting it here. I thought that might get me banned from Wegmans though and that would be a tragedy!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Saw a baby wearing daddy today but didn't have the nerve to say anything
curious-what do you mean by this?
I really think this varies be area for sure. I've only ever seen one other woman wear her baby- forget about a man!!
I love this!
I don't see people wearing their babies in my area either- even in the more "yuppie" area of town where you'd think there'd be some crunchy mommas. lol
I do get a lot of positive comments though- one lady asked me where I got my wrap and said she was going to get one for her daughter who was expecting.
Honestly, if a stranger approached me or DH (who normally wears DS) and commented on our Bjorn as a bad carrier choice, I'd probably politely tell them to eff off. We have a Bjorn because it was a gift and DS loves it. He hates the Moby and facing inward, so why would we spend money to buy a "better" carrier we'd never use? Just because someone is using something that APers don't inherently approve of doesn't mean they're totally ignorant of its merits or downfalls. Maybe they just have their own reasons.
ETA: We never have DS in his carrier for longer than half an hour at a time unless it's a very busy day (like Black Friday) and even then we hold his legs or our hands are under his butt for additional support. I guess it just bothers me when I see posts like this, because it sounds like the OP is calling the person stupid or a bad parent when they don't know all the circumstances leading to the use of that specific carrier.
Mes Petit Choux
I can't go back to yesterday - because I was a different person then. ~ Alice
I don't think the OP is intending to call anyone stupid for using a Bjorn but most Bjorn owners aren't aware that there are other carriers out there that are MUCH more comfortable (and better for baby) and that have a much longer period of usefulness since they can be used for much heavier babies than the Bjorn (plus you can't back carry with the Bjorn which I think is a must for older babies/toddlers). It's not that Bjorn owners are dumb, just that better carriers aren't sold in mainstream stores so folks don't know about them.
Breastfeeding Counselor with Breastfeeding USA
Babywearing Guide ** Newborn Carriers
Cloth Diaper Guide
Safe Bed Sharing Info
Agree 100%! Also, the Bjorn tops out at like 22lbs, which wouldn't have gotten us through the first year! I think my back would give out long before 22lbs, too. There is nothing "not AP" about a BB, but most experienced baby wearers would not recommend one. It isn't the best value or the most comfortable for parent or baby. When I talk to people who have only used a Bjorn, they are suprised that I can still wear DS at his size, and that I could go for any length of time after the first few months. The Bjorn is certainly better than nothing, and it's pretty safe and easy to use, but it's far from the best carrier out there.
We are aware about the Bjorn, also have an Ergo, and DH still prefers the Bjorn. DS actually loves to be outward facing. He doesn't use it for hours at a time so I dont see a problem with it
While I realize the bjorn is not the carrier of choice on here I agree with pp that some babies do actually prefer it. We had a moby, an ergo and a bjorn - all of which dh used by the way - and ds really preferred the bjorn for a long time. And ours goes up to 25 lbs, and since my ds, at 23 months, is only 22 lbs, we could technically still use it. We do use the ergo more now though.
I must live in a very BW'ing friendly area because I see people ALL the time BWing and never have any one comment on it.
this exactly. I sometimes worry that mothers are getting a little too judgy about things like brands of carriers. We have the Bjorn for the same reason- it was a gift for which we are grateful, because carriers are expensive! Especially for a family on a strict budget, like mine. If it made sense for us to go out and drop over $100 on another baby carrier right now, we would. But the Bjorn works just fine for our needs now. I do know there is a lower weight limit on the Bjorn, so we will visit that issue when we get there. As for now, baby, mommy, and daddy are very happy- if you can believe it. And if a stranger came up to me and felt the need to comment on its inferiority, she would forever be in my story book of crazy people who say inappropriate things.
I really don't want to be an oversensetive hag, but the truth is I really do get a little offended sometimes by the animosity of the Bjorn and people's use of them on this board
Would you have been tempted to say anything if the woman was wearing the baby or is that just considered normal. (This is not a flame, I don't mean to be grumpy, this is just something I have given a lot of thought to this week)
I hate the double standard that when mommies do something it is their job, but when daddies do something it is special.
My husband considers baby wearing, diaper changing, and other things concerning the baby part of the job of being a daddy, not something special he does to help me out. When we are out he usually wears Ada because his sling works better then mine. He also changes most of the diapers, except in places where there isn't a changing table for men, but one in the women's room.
He does enjoy the attention he gets for this, and I do too really, because middle age woman always tell me how wonderful he is, and I agree. I just think it is odd that when I do the same things no one blinks an eye. How are we so far into the feminist movement and daddies still are not considered equal parenting partners?