Pregnant after a Loss

Would you be mad at DH

If he was drinking tonight with friends?  I saw this on another board and I couldn't believe it.

Picture you, your DH and a couple of friends at your house to celebrate NYE adn he was planning on drinking... would you be mad at him and expect him to stay sober because you had to stay sober?

*I would not.  Its part of life, I am pg and DH isn't, why cant he drink?  Now, if I was further along and was already progressing in labor and there was a chance we would be headed to the hospital-- then he should probably stay somewhat sober and we wouldn't be having all of our friends over right?

Re: Would you be mad at DH

  • Mad?  No.  A little annoyed (particularly if he got drunk) and jealous?  Yes.
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  • was this on a tri board? those women are nuts.

    That being said, I wouldn't give less than a rat's behind. I'm not an alkie (alchie?), so I wouldn't be jealous that I couldn't drink.  I'd just eat my weight in desserts b/c I can Smile

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  • No, I'm pregnant, not him.  I don't expect him to make sacrifices just because I have to. 
  • Why would they be mad?  That's silly.  He isn't pregnant why can't he drink? craziness.
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  • I'm with you - his life doesn't stop because I'm pregnant.  Now, if he were to go out to a bar and leave you behind to go out and get smashed, that's another story.  But if you're together and he's drinking - what's the big deal?  This is a non-issue for me though because neither I nor DH really drink very much - maybe a glass of wine now and then (obviously, not for my since I've been pregnant!)
  • No...my DH is planning on drinking tonight. I don't care at all.
  • I wouldn't be mad or annoyed. DH and I were big wine drinkers (made it a hobby to try new wines) and spent every Friday at happy hour. Now he says he's drinking for 2, still tries new wines on his own, and still goes to happy hour. I'd go with him but it's a smoking bar. He also goes to the bar every Sunday to watch his team (they aren't local so they are never on at hour house). We are married, but it doesn't mean we need to be together every second of every day, nor does it mean we need to act like each other.

    The only time I'd be mad is if I was close to going into labor, but I know my DH wouldn't be that stupid to get wasted at that time :)

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  • Definitely not. While I admit it makes me jealous and after about 3 hours with drunk people it gets really old, I'd rather he had a good time then just sat there just bc I was pg..silly if you ask me.

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  • No... why would anyone get mad... that's just dumb.
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  • That's nuts!  I am planning on being the DD for dh tonight.  I would never ask him not to drink...why shouldn't he?  I'm just hoping I make it until midnight.  I might be the DD that sneaks out to the car to sleep until dh is ready to go home Smile

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  • It is hard for me to imagine that scenario because DH is not a drinker at all.

    No I would not be mad  

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  • imageBBHME:
    Mad?  No.  A little annoyed (particularly if he got drunk) and jealous?  Yes.

    This! I don't like a drunk DH, well unless of course I am as well.

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  • I agree with all of you ladies.  The girl on 3rd tri is nuts.  Now if DH decided that he wanted to go out to Hollywood to clubs and bars on NYE while I was home I would be a little annoyed but more sad that we wouldn't be together for the new year.... but realistically I would be asleep anyway!
  • Nope, no biggie. At least he's staying at home and not going to the bar with the guys and leaving you home. Let him enjoy. There will come a day when he has to stay sober and you can drink...maybe.

    My DH has never had a drink in his life, though, and I think I would be a little jealous if he started drinking while I was pg. That could have different meanings: 1) I'm such a crazy chic while pg, I have driven him to drinking and 2) Crazy drunk sex would not be fun with him drunk and me just, well, riding... HA!

  • Nah, I wouldn't be mad. It's friggin' New Year's Eve. Gimme a break.
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  • Not at all.  We joke that DH has a free DD for the next 8 months.  Not that he's a big drinker anyway and he rarely (like maybe once a year or less) gets drunk.  I wouldn't be too thrilled with him going out to a bar tonight just because it's so dangerous on New Years and I wouldn't be able to pick him up because of our daughter. 
  • I wouldn't be mad. I was pg last new year's and DH drank. This year I'm a little further along and we decided to just stay in. He's going to have Sparkling Cider with me instead, but that was his choice, not mine!
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  • I wouldn't be mad.  However, DH already said that he's not drinking tonight.  That's his choice though.
  • No.

    Tonight we're hanging out with friends who have a very small child and we'll just be sitting at their house having dinner and such. I encouraged DH to go to the store and buy whatever he wanted to drink. No reason for him not to. Drinking isn't that important to me that if I can't do it, he can't either.

  • Nope doesn't bother me!
  • I wouldn't be mad.  DH drank during the holidays with our families and I could care less.
  • Mad?  No.  Jealous?  A little

    We're having another couple over tonight, and I fully expect that I will be the only one not drinking all night.  I figure DH should drink up, since we'll be at our house and no one has to drive!

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  • I wouldn't, either.  Just because I won't be having any adult beverage (and will likely be asleep hours before midnight!!) shouldn't stop him from enjoying himself.  We were invited to a NYE party and I don't feel up to it and told DH to go and have a good time...doesn't bother me a bit.  (He did pass b/c he would rather be with me.)  Big Smile

  • Mad?! Heck, I'm DD! Now, as Knelli stated, if I was closer to term I wouldn't let DH have more than 1 or 2 beers because I would be worried about going into labor. That said, once I am able to pump enough and maybe supplement some, DH will owe me at least a few DD sessions!
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  • I have curbed our New Years plans this year, but I have good reason. My DH suggested we go to a few parties to celebrate New Years and my 30th birthday- New Years Day. I said if you are putting it that way it's no fun for me to have to sit around and watch you get trashed and be the DD. So we are staying in and having movie night with DS. I have a bottle of sparkeling cider and he has one of Champane. It's not exactly a huge bash, but at least I will be able to have some fun.
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  • i'm not sure. it honestly depended on how drunk he got. if he was just tipsy drunk, that's fine. but if he was falling down drunk and puking everywhere, not so much. but he wouldn't do that anyway.

  • imageShellShockedMama:

    was this on a tri board? those women are nuts.

    That being said, I wouldn't give less than a rat's behind. I'm not an alkie (alchie?), so I wouldn't be jealous that I couldn't drink.  I'd just eat my weight in desserts b/c I can Smile

     

    This exactly.  A glass of wine would be nice, but not a huge deal.  DH can get trashed tonight if he wants (he isn't a big drinker, so probably wont happen).  As long as he doesn't vomit on my new bathroom rug, I don't care.

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  • Actually, DH will be out with his friends tonight. He's away for training out of state. All I asked was that I got a phone call at midnight.

    But, if he were here, I would have no problems with him drinking with his friends. He not a big drinker though anyways. So, I doubt he'd be sh!tfaced.

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  • Nope. In fact I offered to let him go out with his friends tonight but he said he wanted to hang with me and the baby. We are gonna have lobster tails and arrachera on the grill and I told him he could invite his friends over to drink if he wanted to. As I would rather him drink at home and not in the street and get in trouble. If I wasn?t KU we?d both be getting wasted somewhere... it?s NEW YEARS geez.
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  • As long as I got to be there to laugh at him, I would be fine with it.  If he wanted to leave me at home and go out drinking with the boys..... THAT would not be cool.

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  • No. That's silly. As long as he isn't falling down drunk I say drink up. It's NYE.
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  • I wouldn't want him to get wasted, but I wouldn't care if he had a few drinks. That's what we were planning on for tonight (he has a DD), but I got the stomach flu last night, so we'll be staying home. 
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