Why does everything have to be an issue?
DH and I are trying to figure out our summer vacation schedule since I need to put my vacation request in at work by the 31st. Last year we took our 2 weeks in July so we figured we'd do the same thing this year.
We decided on a 2 week period and he emailed BM about it. Of course, it can't just be that easy. She is disagreeing on the amount of time. His CO gives him every other weekend, split holidays and 2 weeks every summer. He wants to take his vacation time 7/12-7/26. That's 2 weeks right ladies? Her problem is that if he takes them on Monday 7/12, it follows his normal visitation weekend of 7/9-7/11. Why should he get shorted his 2 week vacation?
Their CO doesn't specify that he cannot combine his regular weekend with his vacation. He still gets those 14 additional days in addition to the regular weekend visits. She is saying that if he takes them on Fri 7/9 then he needs to return them on Fri 7/23.
What do you ladies think? I think she's trying to take away days from him. I don't understand why everything has to be a fight? Why can't she be grateful her kids have a loving, involved father in their life that wants to take them on a vacation? Ugh!
Vent over.
Re: Why does everything have to be an issue?
Has your DH called her out an asked her why she's getting petty over 2-3 days?
You're right...she's being ridiculous. Call her out and tell her flat out there is nothing in her CO that says you can't do this, she's being petty and at the expense of the children, get over it or you'll see her in court.
I agree mom2one that it is hard to be away from your kids but isn't it just as hard for the dad to be away from his kids? BM chose this life for herself. She chose to sleep with his best friend and get a divorce so she chose a life where she splits holidays and has her kids go on vacation with their dad.
I don't feel sorry for her at all. She should have worked on her marriage a bit harder.
My experience with my ex is that NO it's not as hard for him...but I know most dads are different than he is.
She said she will discuss it after the holidays. They got into it over who took what week for Spring Break (skids get 2 weeks off for Spring Break.) She got all p1ssy when he said that he didn't want to have to go back to court if she couldn't work with him. This is her exact response-"If you want to be a child and go back to court, go ahead. I am not threatened by that. I am getting used to you. You do not ever think of our kids and what they want or need."
She is a piece of work.
We are probably going to just take our vacation in June since BM and BF decided to get married in July. I'm sure their wedding will ruin any vacation plans we have so we'll just keep the peace and change our plans.
Well then enforce your right to have them the full weekend + the two week CO. If she wants to take your DH to court over it, then fine, but he has a right to have them that weekend and for the two weeks. Don't get into the petty arguing, just remind her there is nothing in your CO saying that he can not do this, and he will be enforcing his CO rites, if she refuses, then he will report her in contempt or violation of that court order.
If she's not scared...then fine. No problem. She probably thinks he'll never do it. And if he doesn't, then she's right and her little petty bickering is exactly that...petty and a means to be difficult.
Ditto. I do not know what she is normally like but I can totally understand not wanting to be away from your kids that long and fighting over 2 days. You are right, they are lucky to have a good father but it is still hard for the Mom to want to be away from her kids.
Your husband's ex sounds like my ex husband. Everything is a fight with him. Completely exhausting.
I would think your DH would be able to combine his vacation with his regular weekend visits. I wouldn't like having my kids be away from me for so long, but I can understand your husband's position (and rights).