Auntie - re: Aspergers — The Bump
Special Needs

Auntie - re: Aspergers

Hello Auntie & Merry Christmas!

I wanted to ask you, if you could describe your boy to me at about 3years old so I can try to make a comparison.... My best friend has a 3 year old...and my spidey sense is telling me he could possibly be an Aspie. He's different from my son (surprise! 2 ASD kids are alike, right?)...but a lot of his behavior seems off. And now when I read a thread below where you guys discussed gave me another hint that something is off with him. Among other things...he also refuses to poop on the toilet, only in a diaper or in his underwear....yells at his mother to go away and nobody can make eye-contact with him as he's doing it. He has no problem to go pee.

The other things that are making me wonder are: tip-toeing (all.the.time.... and very very high on his a ballerina), extreme shyness...doesn't want to make eye-contact with other people besides parents, has trouble connecting with children, although when they don't approach him or crowd his space, you can sometimes see him watching them. Also, his speech is great, actually ahead of his age...almost sophisticated. He's VERY interested in trolley-cars (rides on them daily...this trait he shares with my son who is also obsessed with trolley-cars) and he is also obsessed with vacuum cleaner hoses or just hoses....he shakes them very often as if it's a snake...? The hose obsession has been going on for over a year. You can't miss this one....when they would come over to my mom's, he doesn't care about anything/anyone...runs straight to our garden hose and shakes it, announces to his mom he found a hose, and that's the end of it, nothing else matters to him, he can stay occupied by it majority of the time he's at our house...and he seems super happy as he's playing with it.

He does have pretend play,btw.

Do you think it could be something?

My friend has been wondering from time to time, but hasn't done anything because since his speech is so good, it seems to be pacifying her that everything should work itself out. I don't know. She asked me what I think (she knows about my son)....but I can't seem to tell her one way or the other.

They don't have EI like we do here (she's in Europe), so that's not an option for her anyway.



Re: Auntie - re: Aspergers

  • I am not Auntie.

    But in response to, "Do you think it could be something?"

    My answer is yes. 

  • Thank you, Auntie!

    I'm aware of the fake-pretend play, son does/did this. This boy, however, seems like he has true pretend play...pretty varied & spontaneous, so that's why I pointed that out "as a plus" for him. He's definitely difficult to categorize, IMO because he has a lot of "normal" behavior...mixed with some of the abnormal...but the abnormal is also pretty significant.

    But I agree with you...if anything, he'll get "discovered" during school years...but probably not now. It doesn't interfere with his/his mom's life as much right now for her to wanna pursue anything drastic, KWIM? He's mostly at home, so the social akwardness doesn't surface that often...he's with his mother/father 95% of the time & she's a SAHM and not too social herself (and pregnant & tired now on top of it, so she rarely goes out). He's not starting formal preschool until next fall. She gets together with only one other mom about 1-2x month (who has a 2 year old son). He's ok with the 2 year old. But, that's it for social stuff.

    Does your son have problems with learning, does he have to have accomodations so he can learn more effectively? If yes, when did that become apparent that he needed professional intervention in order to learn?

    P.S. Oh, and my son is also the non-tantruming type, like yours...I guess that makes us lucky in that aspect ;-). He's also very mild-mannered and pleasant to be around, like you described...mine's been cracking jokes to people since about 3 y/o, which my ABA people pointed out as something rarely seen in ASD. They said they have to formally teach kids how to tell/understand jokes. I hope this will help him in life...that general happy-go-lucky personality. We've got something going for us, right?

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  • I think they meant moderate to severe ABA providers they don't see too many AS kids or high-functioning kids, because of the strict DTT. The "milder" kids usually go a different route (Floortime etc), so they don't get to work with these kids too often at this agency.

    And they said they do have a specific ABA "program" where they teach about jokes/joking around/irony...etc. Doesn't apply to us, though. My child has his own individual plan...they don't do DTT with him at the table or anything too structured, his learning is done incidentally and through play....really a Floortime/ABA hybrid, which this agency normally doesn't do.

    It's good your boy is such a funny guy, I definitelly see a similar "clown" feature in my son as well.

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