Upset about loss, not sure who to talk to?

kellydisney · December 2009

Obviously I'm upset about my m/c. I just feel like there's no one to talk to who really "gets" it. My husband just says we will try again and not to be worried because the doc said it is common and people go on to have healthy pregnancies all the time. I'm 31, so theoretically I have time. I just feel like I have a clock over my head. And I worry we won't be able to have children at all. What if this happens again? The "what if's" are driving me crazy. And I feel like there's no one to talk to. Because honestly, what can he or my Mom (I only told them, my best friend who is currently 9 weeks pregnant and I don't want to vent to her to freak her out so I'm not venting to her and my aunt). What are you all doing with your doubts and fears regarding getting pregnant?

kellydisney · December 2009

I was going to say - what else can DH and my mom say at this point? They've already said all the right things. I'm sure there's not much that will calm my fears anyhow. You don't know until you know.

ColindaP · December 2009

I vent here and to my wine glass. There are a couple girls who are seeing therapists and find it really helpful, too.

denise_m · December 2009

I keep a journal. And if I'm feeling so inclined, I blog. It helps A LOT.

michrocc · December 2009

I'm so sorry for your loss. I think the "what-ifs" are absolute torture. DH and I spent a good portion of last night talking about this very same thing. For me, confiding in those I can trust and coming to this board is a huge help.

applebride40 · December 2009

I am so sorry for your loss. I know that everyone deals with things very differently but we are always here to listen. And I think the idea of a journal or blog is always a great one. This board and miscarriage/pregnancy loss have been amazingly helpful. It lets you know that you are not alone.

I hope that you find comfort very soon.

OCIrishBruin · December 2009

I completely understand how you feel. This board has been a great place for me because the girls here "get it." I don't think anyone can really understand unless it's happened to them. The "what ifs" drive me crazy too, but get better over time. I saw a therapist once right after my m/c and am going back today (2 months later). I think that helps too, just because they are a neutral person that is not going to just say that you're going to be fine just to make you feel better.

Good luck with your healing. Feel free to reach out to the women on this board whenever you need to.

hbkises · December 2009

ColindaP:
I vent here and to my wine glass. There are a couple girls who are seeing therapists and find it really helpful, too.

this and I also keep a blog which is completely private that I use as a journal to just b!tch and complain and whine. I'd be completely lost without you all my friends here because we've all sadly been there. ((hugs)) You can talk here as much as you want.

I feel like my IRL's are sick of hearing about it

sinisterkat01 · December 2009

I'm so sorry for your loss. This board has been a huge hel for me, because I really had never known anyone (or at least no one confided in me) that had such a loss. It seems like the "right things" are usually not very helpful when people say them - you just need to be able to get all of your feelings out and have someone there to listen and support you. I hope that things become better for you soon, and GL when you decided to TTC.

rjl07 · December 2009

I come here to deal with things usually. DH isn't really good at the sensitive, comforting thing so I try not to bring it up that much since I just get more upset when he doesn't get it. We are all here for you anytime you need to talk, cry, vent, etc.

Mary1013 · December 2009

Though I'm not a frequent poster here, this board has helped me tremendously! All of the ladies here really get it.

Also, I started a private blog for just myself to read a few months ago. I write in it whenever I just feel like I can't keep the emotions in any longer...it really helps!

browniris · December 2009

I feel like I can really relate to a lot of the things you said in your post. I have found that this board is really helpful because everyone understands. We are all in the same/similar situation and know how hard it is to have nobody IRL to talk to. I also started a TTC blog a week or two ago, and I have found that it really helps. I like being able to get out all of my frustrations in writing. Even if there is nobody writing back, I feel like it helps. GL!

kimber926 · December 2009

That's why we're all here. No one "out there" seems to get it. Hang around and you'll see what awesome girls are here!

noellemari · December 2009

Coming here is really helpful because we all feel the same, we've been there, and we understand. Sometimes I think it's just nice to hear you are not crazy. The what-ifs are really tough and I don't think they'll ever leave your mind so you can come here, post your fears, and a ton of amazing ladies will help calm you down!

Jillwithani · December 2009

I love posting on here, drinking wine and used to cry a lot. I found that books help me a lot too. I also enjoy the fact that I can drink wine, read, cry and post on here at the same time. Any combination seems to make me feel better.

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