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3rd Trimester
Brother's lovely girlfriend. (Long Vent)
For those that didn't read my previous post, my brother's girlfriend is 21 and has two kids with her ex husband and is now pregnant with her third. She claims that this one is my brother's kid, but the timing doesn't add up at all. They claim to have had sex the day before her period was due and she tested positive 8 days later, so naturally, we're a little skeptical.
I've been nice and kept my mouth shut because it's not my place to say anything.
But I really can't stand her. =/
Fast forward to yesterday. My brother brought her over my mom's house and she smoked half a pack of cigarettes, drank a 24 oz coffee, and told us she doesn't do "anything by the book". She didn't take PNVs with her first two and has no plans to take them with this one. My mom voiced her concern seeing as how this may be her grandchild and her response was, "I already have two kids and they're fine."
I'm not perfect and there are things I don't do "by the book", but a half a pack of cigarettes?! Really?! Am I crazy or would this kind of make you mad, too?
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Re: Brother's lovely girlfriend. (Long Vent)
I missed the earlier post....are you sure she's pregnant?
Or is this an AW?
I would have flipped out on her...people can be so ignorant.
Yes, this absolutely would make me furious. Unfortunately, she doesn't seem to respect your mom's opinion or involvement. The only person she MAY listen to is your brother, so if your mom can get to him, maybe that would help.
I have a cousin who is pg as well and due right around the same time as me. I just found out she is still smoking cigarettes and the herb and got in to a car accident with her bf (who is driving without a license) so they never called the cops or anything and she never went to get checked out. Unbelievable.
ELPB- where in Chester County do you live?
I posted it about 2 weeks ago. I bought her pregnancy tests because she thought she was and sure enough they were both positive. She was with another guy in October and then my brother in the middle of November. She goes to the doctor on January 16th. We're waiting for a due date to figure out if it's my brother's baby or not.
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Wow! Some people just amaze me. My mom had a lot to say to her and my brother.
I'd be frustrated as well but I really think your brother needs to tell her that she needs to stop the harmful behavior she's doing now and take the pnv since it might be his kid. What is your brother's thoughts on this?
Yes. I think he's embarrassed because he gets defensive and changes the subject. We told him that we would support him no matter what and if he wanted to raise the baby as his own, then we would treat the baby as our own. I think in the back of his mind he knows we're right and it makes him mad.
My brother doesn't say anything to her. He tells us to mind our business, but like I said, I think he's embarrassed and knows we're right. He's 20 and IMO he's definitely not mature enough for his own kid right now. I think I'm going to take him out to eat, just the two of us, and talk to him about the situation. I just have to go about it in a way that doesn't make him upset.
Is your bro going to the doc's with her? It would probably be a good idea. At the first appt, when she is giving her med history, if she is lieing that should be a huge red light to him. When the doc expresses their concern about her behavior, he can see what exactly this will do to his kid (and I would leave it at HIS kid for now)
Honestly, I understand that it is hard to quit smoking, but the other things are not hard to adjust.
I agree. It doesn't seem like she's really involved with the two she has. She throws parties every Saturday night and she's out with my brother at least 3 nights a week without the girls. It bothers me because I can't wait until my daughter is here. I'm going to want to be with her all the time. I can't understand why she doesn't want to spend more time with them.
I'm not sure if he's going or not. And I know it's hard to quit smoking. I quit after 5 years when I found out I was pregnant, but a half a pack? And it's really not that hard to take some PNVs. It just bothers me. =/
I think she sounds selfish and immature. I smoked for longer than I care to admit and quit the day after we found out. It wasn't hard really (well, it was but...)because the possible consequences were too hard to ignore.
She sounds like she's too immature to understand consequences and she mistakes her immatuity for free-thinking.
Slap her. Kidding.
That made me laugh. lol. She's definitely immature. I'm just worried about my brother. He's so excited to be a dad and I want to be excited for him, but I'm having a hard time with it. =/
Sorry you've been on bed rest! =( T&Ps for you. But that's generally how it works. I TTC for a long time and I'd get really mad when drug addicts and young kids got pregnant right away.