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Multiples
Benefits of Twins - Moms of Twins Please Respond!
We were quite shocked to find out I was pregnant with twins since I wasn't taking any treatments and they don't run in the family. As you have experience, as soon as people found out it made it more exciting, but I also got multiple comments like "you'll go crazy," "I could barely handle one newborn," "I know a girl who had twins and she looks like death warmed over now," etc. Trust me, I know this will be challenging, but I have enough doubts in my own mind without adding to it all the comments I'm hearing!
So, for all of us expecting twins for the first time, could the Mommies of twins let us know about the perks of having two? The challenges will inevitably be here, so during the pregnancy I want to focus on the benefits! I've heard a few already....
Thanks!
Here comes Baby #3!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Benefits of Twins - Moms of Twins Please Respond!
I second what PP said about always having someone to play with. My boys (and DD) are lost with out each other. I am a little nervous about teaching sharing, it doesn't seem to be working so far, but they are only 15 months, so I"m hoping it will get easier.
Also, not to be funny, but the public is way nicer to MoMs - When I only have DD with me, no one holds the door or anything like that, but when the boys are with me, if someone is around, they are happy to help. And, so many older people seem to really enjoy seeing them - sometimes it's really nice to see a smile on someone else's face and know that my boys put it there. : )
I haven't had my babies yet, but I keep telling myself that I'll be lucky to have double the hugs and kisses, and "I love you mommies", and double the first's, double the snuggles etc...
And in our case, I get to do this once, and be done, because DH and I have always agreed on two kiddos.
BFP #2 10/13/2009 on our 2nd Wedding Anniversary
Discovered TWINS during the 6w u/s - what a shocker!
Delivered on 5/19/2010 at 34 weeks due to pre-e and HELLP syndrome
The Bump MoM Recipe Collection
My girls are only 5mths but I am so glad that I had twins even on those days when I am going crazy. And I most certainly do not look like hell either. When they first realize each other is so sweet. And when you get those first real smiles. And I know they will always have one another and will be able to entertain each other.
And we are done also. So i got two for the price of one. And even my friends with singletons always say better you than me. I dont know how you do it. Well, just think how wonderful you will feel knowing you are doing it. And doing a great job. Good luck with your twins!
I was never a person that REALLY wanted twins, but I absolutely LOVE having them now. It's true, they have built in playmates and for the most part are quite easy going...partially, I'm sure, because they have to be!
I also think I'm a lot more mellow as a mom with twins. Once I found out it was twins at my first u/s, I realized that it really wasn't going to work to have preconceived thoughts about how I wanted my delivery to go or how I wanted to exclusively BF or anything like that. Two throws such a wrench into everything that you just have to go with the flow. It's also great because I don't get stressed out about milestones and such because you have a great example that kids develop differently. And that's the best thing about twins--you have two little individuals that just happen to be the same age!!
***Twin fraternal girls born at 35w6d in 12/2008***
people are truly assholes, huh??
I LOVE having twins and don't find it that hard - i mean- it's not easy by any means- but it's not HARD for me most of the time. My babies were born at term though, and don't have any medical issues other than reflux- so I am certainly very fortunate -as many moms of twins do deal with health issues and prematurity- which makes life a lot harder... though, I know none of them would change having twins either!
I was JUST thinking how great it is that they always have each other - right now they are in their exersaucer and jumperoo next to each other- and having a blast. When they are laying on the floor play mat - they are together and have fun together - and this will only get better as they are older and REALLY play together.
I was thinking how Griffin lost out on this type of thing being a singleton - he only had me- and sometimes i was very boring
it's twice the love! Twice the cuteness! Twice the fun! yes- it's twice the work/worry/crying, etc - but you get used to it - and that becomes your normal. You will start to laugh and get annoyed when you hear moms of one complain about how hard their life is... and you'll feel great that you can handle two when so many can barely handle one.
And the attention is fun (if you like that kind of thing). People LOVE twins and almost all people say really sweet things to me when i'm out in public - sometimes tehre are stupid people who say dumb things- but everyone means well - and some people just gush over them and how blessed we are- it's really nice.
and yes- you are VERY blessed to have twins/trips. I wouldn't have it any other way.
I agree with all the posters. Our twins will have each other. They will learn to share right away and always have a playmate. And this is my opinion only - but this pregnancy has been so hard on me already (i have been very very sick) - that I feel like I will be satisfied with my two (although that could still change) but as of now - I am not looking to be pregnant anytime in the foreseeable future.
Congratulations on your news!
*Edited* Just noticed we have the same due date!!!! :-)
I didn't want to hear those comments either, but trust me, some (okay, a lot) of them turn out to be true. But you do manage. And the good things totally outweigh the bad.
Perks:
That first day they "notice" each other.
Watching them play together and comfort each other when one is upset.
People go out of their way to help you when they see you lugging 2 around!
Double kisses and smiles!
Watching how 2 babies born at essentially the same time can be SO different! It's amazing.
Honestly, I don't know how to really say how great they are. I can't imagine not having both of my boys. We've had some very rough patches, but it's all worth it. They truly are double blessings!
Joining a multiples club really helped me out with getting used to the idea too.
Last meeting, I brought this same topic up and every single MoM said they would do it again in a heartbeat. Some even said, they would like to have a second set of twins!!
Like any newborn, the first few months are going to be rough, but all the MoMs in my group (and here) seem to be surviving and happy, so I have hope!
I have a long list but at the moment:
They are really starting to play together. Chase, wreslte, I even saw them handing eachother puzzle pieces...my heart just melted! I work my a@@ off staying @ home w/ them but it's one thing they are "helping me" w/...b/c although they still love to play w/ mommy; they're brother is RIGHT there too.
There's lots of work but LOTS of fun coming your way too!
We also have the same pet! I have a beagle at home too.
Thats awesome!!! Beagles rock!!!! Hope to see ya around the board. :-)
I actually know some MoMs who feel this way - that they WANT another set of twins- and those who are pg with just one after their twins are a little sad it's not twins... because they loved having twins, and b/c they know the benefits to their kids that are twins.
I do think sometimes that Griffin misses out on some things being a singleton- but thankfully he's so close in age to them- they'll all be pals playing together soon -and he'll have 2 younger brothers looking up to him forever, instead of just one
Tell people to just shut it:)
it's great, they have each other and you have to beautiful LO's to look at every morning:)
I love being a MoM!
if this is your first time you don't know any better and it will be your norm.
I manage to shower 2 times a day and still have time to do what I like:)
GL!
Savannah
Callista
Baby Trail Blog
"Someday we will look at our babies and know it will be worth it. If it was easy, we would not have had our babies, the babies we were meant to have." From Amy052006
I totally agree with GL. People can be very insensitive but obviously they don't know any better.
When I was pregnant I never 2nd guessed myself. I had the attitude that I can do it! After they were born I wanted to do everything myself, don't get me wrong it was hard and I did accept help but it does get easier as they get bigger but you have to realize that it is nothing like having one baby and it will never be that way either.
You will get double everything: love, smiles, laughs you name you'll get it. Also you have the opportunity to share in the delight of two little individuals growth and wonderment of the world around them and the relationship they share with each other and you.
Embrace this opportunity, because you'll never get to relive it. Accept everyday for what it is and what it brings. You'll have great days and bad days but you'll never get them back. Love them and hug them and kiss them like nothing else. It goes by so fast, one day you will be exhausted wondering how you will get through another day. Just to wake up another morning and say to yourself "How did they get so big?"
You can do this, just like all of us. You will survive!
Congrats,
XOXO from another MOM you will need them
twice the work but twice the reward.
and I also agree with Goldi, I dont find twins to be THAT hard. I feed them together, they nap together...as long as you keep their schedules the same you get the same downtime as any other mom.
Maybe my opinion is because they are my only kids so its all I know.
You also get discounts at places, and if you choose to breastfeed, you burn more cals!
For me it was a true blessing. We had been trying for several years when I got pregnant. When we found out it was twins, we were thrilled because the likelihood of me getting pregnant again is slim to none and we always wanted more than one.
It is also double the love. Everytime I look at their little faces I am overwhelmed with joy.
2 chem preg, 4 failed IUIs, 2 canc IVFs, 2 BFN IVFs, IVF #5 = BFP!!!
3/23 Beta #1 @ 17dpo = 913, Beta #2 @ 19dpo = 1724, Beta #3 @ 21 dpo = 3240
First u/s 3/29 @ 5 weeks 2 days - 3 sacs 6 weeks 3 days - 3 heartbeats 8 Weeks - Lost Baby C, Babies A and B going strong
My twins are just a little over 3 months- there was 6 of us pregnant at our Church around the same time (June-October) they just had one baby and I think they've had a harder time adjusting from their comments about how our babies are so good, STTN around 2 months, etc... perhaps it's just "luck" that it seemed everything been going so great for us- these are also our first children so I have really nothing to compare.
I've also been told by other MoM that they found having twins was easier than a singleton as pp have mentioned when they grow up they entertain each other.
This post just a put a smile on my face because I ask myself the same questions and other than having each other what are other benefits of twins. I, too, was very surprised when the doctor told us twins and now having twins means moving, possibly leaving my job and it raises so many other questions and concerns BUT reading all of your responses puts a smile on my face and makes me realize how special we are to be having twins.
So.... thank you for asking this questions and thank you for all the posts.....
This was a great post!
I obviously haven't had my twins yet and am still getting used to the idea of having twins. But I'm really glad that I don't have to go through the whole pregnancy thing again! I always wanted three kids, but I hate being pregnant! So that is a real advantage to me!
Great post! So many of the responses put a smile on my face, and others got me all choked up (stupid hormones!) thinking about how amazing it's going to be and how lucky we are to have two on the way.
My sister has twin boys, so I've already seen so much of what you've all described as an adoring aunt, and I can't wait to experience it firsthand as a mom. I know my nephews will be SO excited to find out they have twin cousins on the way, too- in their eyes, being twins is super special
This is exactly (even to the age of DD) where I will be....all I think!
This was so nice to see, this thread..heck, some had me in tears!
Benefit - You get two babies! Two!! It really is a benefit in-itself.
Also, these are my first kids, so yes it is hard, but I don't know any different because I never had one baby to compare it to. You just get used to things coming in doubles because everything is better in pairs.
I don't have any other fun things to add because my babies are too young, but people are definitely nicer to you because you didn't "just have a baby", rather "you just had twins! how exciting!" There are major perks to two.
Thanks so much for all of these heartwarming posts!! I read some while waiting for a business appointment earlier and a few sentimental tears formed.
DH and I have no illusions about the challenges of parenting, but we are very excited for this unexpected surprise. Both of us hadn't ruled out 3 kids, but I doubted I'd go past 2. Now we get 2 for 1!! DS is so sociable too, so I think he'll really enjoy having 2 siblings.
I soooo needed this post today. I've been home sick with a hell of a cold and I've had way too much time to think and freak out about the reality of it all.
These posts reminded me that it is a blessing and that I will live and may actually enjoy it!
Thanks ladies!
I really appreciated how many Moms responded- THANK YOU!
While I know that there will be challenges, most people that made the "comments" didn't even have twins or multiples! I think these are the same people that make "comments" when you announce that you're getting married.
I thought I couldn't be more excited about this, but reading all of these posts really warmed my heart, and got me even more excited. I do feel very blessed.
this exactly!!!
The best thing is when they are waking up from their naps and you can hear on the monitor them talking to each other.....it's soooo amazing that they have each other. Mine cannot stand to be away from each othe for a sec.
Plus.....you do kinda feel famous whenever you go any where...lol it's kinda cool.
Luke 6.12 lbs, Alexandra 5.15 lbs.
April 5th, 2007-Isabella and Robert. We miss you. Born at 22 weeks, 2 days.
This. DH and I kept telling ourselves over and over during my PG that we don't know any better and have NO idea what it's like to have 1. And nwo when we talk about it, we really don't know what we'd do with 1 baby...almost like we'd be bored!!
(not really, but you'll see) I can honestly say - without a doubt - that I have NOT been bored in 3 months and 4 weeks. Not for 1 second.
Mine just noticed each other a few weeks ago and it was seriously one of the most awesome things I have ever witnessed.
I have never gone a day without showering, we make it a point to take the babes out and about so that we have practice (though I haven't done it totally alone still - I'm a chicken).
It's a great feeling knowing what all I'm accomplishing each and every day!
And I definitely don't look like death warmed over. We managed to hit the sleeping-baby jackpot though with them sleeping like champions at nighttime...naptime is a different story.
As PPs have said, having them entertain each other instead of relying on your for everything is really nice!
And there is nothing like sitting there with both babies on your lap -- one on each leg -- reading a book. Or hugging both of them at the same time. And all of the kisses. It is the absolute best.
As hard as it is -- and it is hard -- I am SO GLAD I have twins!