any military spouses out there?

orangedaisy85 · December 2009

Hubby and I are planning on TTC soon, I'm not starting my next pack of bc pills. I've always wanted to have a baby, even more so here lately. But now that we have the green light, I'm kinda scared. I pin pointed it to the fact that being a military family, there is always a chance that my husband won't be there for some part of it. Whether that be the pregnancy, the birth, or the firsts. I know I want him there for all of it, but I also no that there is never any gaurantee of that. We would wait, but then we'd always be waiting on the next PCS, remote, TDY, or deployment. Are there any other military spouses out there that would like to share their experiences?

Blasianlove · December 2009

Sorry I don't have personal experience, but you might want to check out the Babies: 0-12 months board. That is if you are looking to speak to women who already have babies and may be dealing with deployment.

skinnursemandee · December 2009

There are military wives on this board who have children, ttc etc.

I just had a baby. My husband was deployed for her birth so sadly he missed it however i would not change a thing. If him missing her birth means he will be here for her first year then thats how I want it. If we constantly wait for the right time in the military to have a family then we will never have children. Like my husband says. If the Army wanted him to have a family, they would have issued one in basic training.

You do what feels right to you. It will all work out the way it is supposed to. You will have a great support network with your FRG.

edited to add: he will be home friday and we will be pcs'ing from georgi to new york next week. is a tough life but our men are worth it

Its tough work. Its hard being alone with a newborn without a break but she is the love of my life and I wouldnt change it for the world.

Valjoy11 · December 2009

My husband is currently an inactive reservist for the USAF while he works on his Master's. We plan to go back to active reserve status this summer while he finishes up chaplain training and graduates from seminary. After a year or so of parish experience and reserve experience we will go back to active duty, which he did for 7 years before we met.

I have yet to really experience military life fully, but I got a good taste of it when he was gone for 3 months this summer training. We are going at TTC whole hog, hoping he will be around for the first pregnancy and birth, and most of the first year. Because you're right, he's going to miss a lot with the others.

Listen to the ladies above. I am there with you, its going to be tough, but unless you want to wait until you are 40+ to be a parent, you (and I) are going to have to dig deep and make the best out of this we can. Life is unpredictable enough even when you aren't a military spouse... at least we already know the kind of unpredictability we are facing Wink

Feel free to PM me if you want to talk about this more.

mrs.oz · December 2009

Sorry, lurking...

If you're wating for the perfect time, you'll end like me...not having your first child till you've been married for over 8 years. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

With that being said, I did have a lot of fun with DH before we got pregnant. It wasn't the military that kept us for trying. Don't let any one issue prevent you or push you into starting a family. I had goals set before I wanted to start a family. Although I love my military life and wouldn't change a thing about it, I refuse to ever let the military make decisions for me. Now or later, it doesn't matter. Just make the decision on your terms.

Valjoy11 · December 2009

Sorry- PM does not want to play nice with me!

You'll probably have to look up local/regional insurance companies in your area for an idea of what's available. TMG is the one my friend worked for, but that's here in Scranton. I did a google search and it came right up and I was able to apply myself. But TMG has you come into the office periodically to pick up work, so its not a true work from home kind of thing. My temp agency got me a position doing the same thing in office for another insurance company around here, so that's another possibility for you.

HTH!

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