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Attachment Parenting
LucyPevensie
member
Pet Peeve "My pedi said..."
LucyPevensie
member
"... that CIO/early solids/supplementing/standing baby on its head is what we should do."
It's important to trust your child's pediatrician - no doubt about it. But there is a difference, I think, between blind trust - and a healthy trust, and even a partnership - that also allows for your own research, your own instincts, and your OWN knowledge of your child (which far exceeds your pedi's experience with your child.)
Just sayin'. Not in regard to any specific post.
Wheee!
"When it comes to sleeping, whatever your baby does is normal. If one thing has damaged parents enjoyment of their babies, it's rigid expectations about how and when the baby should sleep." ~ James McKenna, Ph.D., Mother Baby Behavioral Sleep Center, University of Notre Dame
"When it comes to sleeping, whatever your baby does is normal. If one thing has damaged parents enjoyment of their babies, it's rigid expectations about how and when the baby should sleep." ~ James McKenna, Ph.D., Mother Baby Behavioral Sleep Center, University of Notre Dame
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Pet Peeve "My pedi said..."
Matthew Kevin
7/31/83-7/20/11
Met 1/8/00
Engaged 4/21/06
Married 9/29/07
Two beautiful legacies: Noah Matthew (2 yrs) and Chloe Marcella (8 mos)
Day Three
Mom, why are you washing my feed in the sink?!
LO #1 - 1 unmedicated/self-monitored IUI w/ donor sperm.
LO #2 - 1 m/c, 2 BFNs, 4th IUI worked (unmedicated/self-monitored with new donor sperm).
Life is beautiful!
On a related note, it really concerns me that pediatricians recommend some things that seem to be supported more by "tradition" and old wives' tales than by science. I think some of these docs graduated 30 years ago and have done nothing to stay current in their field... or maybe they just offer the same advice their mothers and mothers-in-law gave them when they had their kids. Ugh. Thankfully, my rock star midwife set us up with a great pediatrician who is supportive of our bed sharing, selective vaccination schedule, etc.
I use "my pedi said" all the time. Like, "My pedi said breastfeeding is better than bottle feeding for reflux." "My pedi said you can't spoil a baby by holding them too much" "My pedi said CIO is not age appropriate"... and so on
I do sometimes stretch the truth though and will say "my" pediatrician said something when really it's just the AAP suggestion... or even Dr. Sears. He's a pediatrician, right?
Charlotte Ella 07.16.10
Emmeline Grace 03.27.13
Well of COURSE in your case it's a brilliant use of "my pedi said.."
"When it comes to sleeping, whatever your baby does is normal. If one thing has damaged parents enjoyment of their babies, it's rigid expectations about how and when the baby should sleep." ~ James McKenna, Ph.D., Mother Baby Behavioral Sleep Center, University of Notre Dame
*claps*
Another thing I don't understand are pedis that go against their own organization's recommendations and studies.
I agree. I trust my pedi's advice on most things, but if she tells me something that's more "parenting" related that I don't agree with, I just nod and smile and ignore her advice. I can't actually think of an instance where she's given me any parenting advice though, but if she ever did, I guess that's what I do.
You know your kid best and you know what's right for them.
Careful...none of you have medical degrees and you might be told you are judgmental for going against a dr!
You do know that drs know best always!
This. I don't think I even ask him about non-medical issues and he knows how we feel and doesn't even bring anything non-medical up. This was after we had the "where is baby sleeping" conversation...I told him with us and he did the whole "Well, the AAP can't recomend that". This was our last conversation about non medical issues. I actually really respect him for not pushing anything on us.
I will say that our pedi is also one of the good ones. He told me that as long as I have looked at the benefits and risks and that we as a family are comfortable with our decision that he will back us 100%. And when Kate was in the hospital and we asked for a bed and not a crib so that we could co-sleep they were very supportive of that.
One of my best friends is a pediatrician (and a very well educated one - went to one the best medical schools and works at the Children's Hospital of Philadelphia) and she said that they don't cover so much of this stuff in their training - for example, sleep issues. So whatever advice they're giving you isn't really any medical problem they've studied. My first pedi gave me advice to do a Ferber type method, breastfeeding advice and told me to get a diaper service (I cloth diaper obv). But she really has no training in sleep disorders or BF and really shouldn't be dispensing it...
So basically I feel very comfortable, given my friend's insight, that it is really not their area to comment on these things (or our place to ask for advice - which was her issue). That being said, even if you disagree with your doc, they do have medical training on what nutrients the baby needs, vaccination, etc. so even if you chose not to do what they say, I think their POV is valid for those things.
To me it's the same thing as the people who think their OBs are God. Drives me nuts!
Yes, Dr. Sears and just about all of his kids are pedi's. They have a really nice office but none of them are ever in it
A thousand times, this. So I really don't care at all what my pedi has to say about CIO, but I put a lot of weight behind her solids advice (which I consider gastro-intestinal related).
That said, even with vaccines, she & I talked things through and came up with a plan we were both comfortable with. She has so much more experience and expertise than I do, but he's my baby and I have ultimate responsibility for his welfare and I have to be comfortable with what's happening.
Oh Goodness, THANK YOU FOR THIS!
I got reamed out on third tri for offering advice to someone... about scheduled inductions I think (the induction was scheduled for like 37 weeks because of an ultrasounded "big baby"... I THINK thats what it was for.
The girl wasn't comfortable with the induction, and said so. I simply said that had I been in her shoes, I would have sought a second opinion and that doctors don't always know best.
I was accused of getting all my sources from Riki Lake and... yadda, yadda, yadda... it was bad.
I'm sorry, doctors are human, humans make mistakes, it's up to YOU to decide whats best for YOUR child taking into account the medical SUGGESTIONS of the doctor.
/end rant
I agree. My pedi told me at my son's one week appt to switch breasts half way through because my son was only taking one breast per feeding. I asked her if this wouldn't mean my son is only getting formilk and no hindmilk and she said just the opposite actually. She said she worked with the head of LLL when she was nursing one of her daughters and the head told her to do this to help put meat on her daughter. I called my LC as soon as I got home and she asked me not to follow this suggestion. It didn't sit right with me. I'm glad I did more research. Common sense alone told me my pedi was misinformed or at least misinforming me.
My older son's pedi told me my son would drain me in 9-11mins and not to let him nurse longer than that. I fought for my supply the entire time I nursed my first one.
This is exactly how I think too.
This made me laugh. DS's pedi is literally at least 70, probably closer to 75 and I think he has been in the field so long that the old has come and gone and come back again. Lucky for us, the "old" was pretty child centered. He's a great doc.