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Stranger Etiquette: Compliments for LO

mquila2000mquila2000 member
in Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

If another parent compliments your LO, do you compliment their LO? What's the etiquette on that (if there is any)? DH and I were talking about this today because yesterday a family in line before us at Target started talking to us about DS-out of nowhere.

They complimented him and I never thought about it until today, what should you do. Their LO was small and cute (she's alot older and smaller than DS), I guess that it just never crossed our minds to say something at the time. 

We get lots of positive comments on DS, but we aren't the most social people-so reciprocating wasn't a thought to us before. Plus, most of those strangers don't have LOs with them.

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Re: Stranger Etiquette: Compliments for LO

  • susanmosleysusanmosley member

    I don't think you have to compliment back.  In fact, if I compliment someone and they compliment back, I always take it as a counter compliment that really isn't genuine.  I don't counter compliment unless I feel compelled because I really have something to compliment them on.

    Oh the social rules of life -so annoying... 

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  • the_mulvathe_mulva

    Sounds like you're really over-thinking this.  I don't think getting a compliment means you are required to give one in return.  That would make for a pretty insincere cluster of compliments.  

     Say "thanks" and  move on w/  your life. 

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  • SBear12SBear12 member

    Funny, DH and I have talked about this too. If someone's gushing about your kid, I think it sometimes sounds fake to be like, "Oh thanks so much! Yours is really cute, too..." almost like it's an after-thought. It's hard to sound genuine (even if you intend to be!) in that situation.

    The best approach I've come up with is to pick something specific and comment on that instead: "Thanks! And how old is your little one? He has such gorgeous eyes!" etc. Or if someone's commenting on her vocabulary, or something else non-physical, I usually try and downplay it by saying something like "yeah she talks and walks, but still doesn't crawl!"

    Such a silly thing to worry about, I know... but it can make for awkward situations!

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  • kelbriankelbrian
    I don't think getting a compliment requires you to give one in return. If a stranger compliments my DD, I will go with what comes to mind - I'll either just say thank you or I will compliment their DC. It depends on the situation, the person, etc. 
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  • mlf625mlf625

    I *always* say something nice about someone's kid if they compliment DS. ?I'd just feel kind of awkward not reciprocating, I guess. ?I try to be genuine though, and say something specific like "oh, I love her blonde curls!" or "his outfit is SO cute!" so it doesn't seem like I'm just saying something because they did.

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  • sunnygyrlsunnygyrl
    We always say thank you. Luckily, we haven't been put in an awkward situation as of yet. If I see children, I am open to compliment too and we don't typically received compliments on our child in return.
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  • jamie5315jamie5315
    I just politely say thank you and move on. 
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  • GRKatersGRKaters member
    Nope, I don't give a compliment in return. I do try to say something more than "thanks" though... DS's chubby cheeks are often commented on, for example, and I'll say something like, "Well, he sure loves to eat, haha!"
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