Northern California Babies

Life can be so cruel... I quit... (vent)

So, I go to Costco this AM to get pics of Haleigh printed - a very emotional thing to do mind you... 

I get there- tell the girl from behind the counter that the pics I need printed are of my still born daughter. She reaches out- touches my hand and said: "I lost one too, I understand." So, of course, I start crying in public (embarrassing) and have to walk away for 10 minutes to collect myself.... and then finish ordering my pics.

Then, I go to another counter to do a return and I get a phone call. It is a pretty good friend of mine.

Conversation:

her: "how ya' doing? I called your house and your Dh told me to call your cell."

me: "I am at costco ordering pics of Haleigh- it has been a tough day." (voice cracks as I start crying again)

her: "how are you doing w/ all that?"

Me: "just taking life one day at a time." (sob, sob)

her: "Yeah. cause that is what you have to do." 

her: "well, I have something to tell you and to ask you! (giggles w/ excitment!)

Me: "what?" (as stomach drops)

her: "I'm pg!!!!  I wanted to call you and tell you -but also ask.... like.... what do I do? Should I make a Dr. appt or what?"  (me thinking... I just cremated my daughter and some how you think I am the best person to ask this questions? Get a f'ing clue!)

me: "Uh - yeah and vitamins. Lisa, I am in a store, I got to go." (which I will never call her again!)

her:  "yeah. please do."

I quit life!   I could punch a b!tch!

#1: PMS'ing, #2: Ordered pics today of dead daughter. #3: DH knowlying had her call my cell while @ costco ordering pics. #4: so-called friend asking me advise on how her loser bf and her can prepare for a baby seconds before I cry to her on the phone about mine being dead.

I just needed to vent....

Is 1:07pm too early to drink???

Re: Life can be so cruel... I quit... (vent)

  • I'm sorry :( - People can be very clueless and insenstive, or both perhaps in this case. Hope your day gets better. P.s. Nope, not too early!
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  • Oh sweetie.  I'm so sorry that she was so self-absorbed and clueless.  It's really time like these that you need to do what's best for you and surround yourself with people who aren't so selfish.   Protect yourself:  your heart, your head, your whole being.  You're very fragile and you don't need dumb-assses in your life.  

     

    And for what it's worth, you're so much nicer than me - I probably would have responded to her with "are you seriously asking me about being PG given what I just told you?"  And let the deafening silent response eat her up.   She's a moron.

    Hugs.

    Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it.
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  • She is a complete idiot.

    And keep in mind this is coming from an Irish woman....

    It is never too early to start drinking.  You deserve one after such a rough day!

     

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  • (((hugs)))

    Have a double, on me.  Drinks

  • I am so sorry i did not know about your baby.

     You friend was being incredibly insensitive. As far as the drink, I think it is 5 o'clock somewhere :)

     Hang in there.....You are in a dark place right now but it will not stay that way always.

     

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  • Big hugs to you!  I'm sorry that people are so insensitive.  And yes, it's not too early to have a drink.  DrinksBeer
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  • I'm so sorry, E.  I'm sending you a hug and thinking of you.  I'm sorry that anyone would be so ridiculously stupid and thoughtless and insensitive.  She really is just a complete idiot.  You deserve so much better from a friend.  I think you have every right and reason to take a long break from that person.  So sorry :(
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  • Who ever 1 started me... you are an @ss hole!
  • I'm sorry, what a hard morning.  I hate to say it but she is not a friend.  She'd have to be a stupid not to know that would be hurtful!  Lot's of love and go ahead an pour a drink!
  • It is not too early to drink at all! I say have a double.  I'm pretty blown away that your friend could be so thoughtless, I'm terribly sorry.
  • I'm so sorry. I can't believe a friend would be so thoughtless :(

    And as for the 1-star... Whoever this anonymous 1 starrer is, she/he is real piece of sh*t. I hope you don't let them bring your day down even more than it already is.

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  • I am so, so very sorry E.  That just sucks, especially when it comes from a so-called "good" friend.  Sadly, I think most of us who have had a loss have similar stories about asshat friends - remind me to share mine next time we see each other.

    I hope your day gets a little better/easier.  And in my opinion, now is the PERFECT time for a drink...

    xoxo

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  • imageLV2006:

    I am so, so very sorry E.  That just sucks, especially when it comes from a so-called "good" friend.  Sadly, I think most of us who have had a loss have similar stories about asshat friends - remind me to share mine next time we see each other.

    I hope your day gets a little better/easier.  And in my opinion, now is the PERFECT time for a drink...

    xoxo

    Thanks, L. Sadly, I am sure there are many stories to share....

    Crap.

    Look forward to seeing you again... I hope the soup was okay.

  • so clueless is your friend. I am soooo sorry.
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  • I'm so sorry.  My heart absolutely broke for you when I read your story and I can't believe someone who would consider themselves your friend could be so insensitive.  Vent all you need to. 

    And eff the loser who one-starred you.  WhoTF does that??  Although I suppose I could almost feel sorry for that person who needs to make someone posting about their tragedy feel even worse to make themselves feel better.  That's about as low as you can get. 

  • Sending you big, huge hugs. Your story broke my heart. That is so incredibly insensitive, and I'm disappointed that your DH didn't insulate you better from this additional hurt, especially today given the purpose for your Costco trip (unless he didn't know why she was calling, which makes it marginally better I suppose).
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  • I am mad for you!! What a schmuck.

    **HUGS**

  • Big hugs.  So sorry your friend is so daft.  I had almost the very same thing happen.  I was leaving the OBs office after handing him our miscarried child to confirm a miscarriage when my MOH called to announce her pregnancy.  The call ended with her saying something like "I hope you're still happy for me".
  • I am sorry to hear about your douchie friend. Some people are so insensitive. Please, feel free to vent to use anytime. Hugs.
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  • I am sorry!  ((BIG HUGS))
  • So so sorry. About Haleigh and the clueless "friend". Hugs. I would not talk to anyone that is not supportive of you right now.  
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  • Big hugs to you.  Your "friend" is clueless.  I agree with previous posters: only surround yourself with those who are supportive of you.  I'm so sorry.  (((hugs again))))
  • I am so very sorry for your loss and your friend's attitude.  I cannot believe a friend could be so insensitive.  Some people are so unbelievably rude.  A drink is for sure in order.  Hugs...
  • I'm sorry that that girl was so cluless.  I swear some people don't think before they speak - she is a great example.
  • I'm so very sorry, you are a much nicer person than I would have beem, I would have probably gone off on the so called "good friend" for being so insensitive.

    People are as$holes.

    I'm sorry.

  • That is by far the craziest thing I have ever heard. How insensitve. I am sorry that you had to deal with all of that all on the same day.
  • I'm so sorry Elizabeth. For all of it. ((((HUGS))))
  • I'd like to kick your friend in the vag.  Seriously.  I just wanted to say that I read your story the other day and I think you are incredibly brave and courageous for sharing your story with us.  You are in my thoughts.  Please know that we all aren't as douchey as the douchecock that one starred this.
  • I'm so sorry for the many asshats you've encountered recently. I hope you got that drink, and maybe another one after that.
  • oh my god...I am so so so sorry.  Your friend is an idiot...I'm so sorry...I just don't even have the words.  (((HUGE HUGE HUGS)))
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  • imagemrscerruti2be:
    I'd like to kick your friend in the vag.  Seriously.  I just wanted to say that I read your story the other day and I think you are incredibly brave and courageous for sharing your story with us.  You are in my thoughts.  Please know that we all aren't as douchey as the douchecock that one starred this.

    Big huge ditto. My thoughts are with you, I'm so sorry you've had to deal with sucky people lately on top of everything else. 

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