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stessed about mil and next ultrasound

Jessee28Jessee28 member
in 3rd Trimester

I took my mom to the 20 week ultrasound and since I did that dh wants to take his mom to the next one which will be in 4 weeks (31 weeks). We are team green and I want to stay this way. I am afraid she is going to spoil it all. She has a way of doing things like that. After all this time I would hate to spoil it now. Dh is not stressed about he is like just tell her not to tell. I am trying to think of a way so it wont happen. Maybe go in first tell them we are not finding out and just in case it would show have them find an angle it wont and bring her in. I dont know. Help this is really stressing me because if it was me I wouldnt bring her at all because I know she never keeps quiet about anything. I hate that I am stressed about this, ultrasounds are supposed to be fun. I had this agrument with Dh on the last one and told him I didnt like the stress but he is worried about her feelings and I know he has already told her she can come to this one. It was the only way I could get him to let mom come to the last one.

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Re: stessed about mil and next ultrasound

  • bananasmommabananasmomma

    What is the reason for an ultrasound?  If it is for a medical condition, they more than likely will just focus on that one issue and not search around. 

    Do you guys know and just aren't telling anyone?  Also, does your mom know?

    I would tell the tech that you do not want to know the sex and ask if they can stay away from that area. 

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  • Anna&MattAnna&Matt member
    at this point they can feel the baby from the outside and do the u/s in a way that they don't show that part of the baby - that's what we did when we took DH's family at 30 weeks. Just tell the tech not to show that part of the baby.
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  • susanlovestexassusanlovestexas member
    Unless she's seen a lot of u/s or has u/s experience, I doubt she'd be able to tell.  I have an u/s every week and sometimes I still don't recognize the "girl" parts without being told what I am looking at.  Plus, if you let them know that you don't want to find out, there's really no reason for them to show that part.  Good Luck!
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  • CiarraiCiarrai
    Unless your u/s tech actually said something one way or another, I'm not sure your MIL could tell.  It's not as obvious as you think even if you get the "money shot" if you don't know what you're looking at.  If the tech doesn't stop there and study it or start explaining it, no one will know what they saw.  My BFF was on team green with her first but she and her DH were sure the u/s tech slipped and showed them the "money shot" and it was a boy.  She has a beautiful, 15-month-old baby girl.  Just remind the tech you don't want to know if it's a boy or girl and you'll be fine.
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  • Nicole731Nicole731 member
    Tell the u/s tech before they start that you are NOT finding out the sex and to please not scan between the legs, and if they need to scan there for measurement reasons to please turn the screen from you. Problem solved.
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  • erinshaneberinshaneb
    I hate situations like this..sorry you are going through it..that's why we refuse let anyone go to appointments with us or be in the delivery room..my mother is a very jealous person and her feelings get hurt easily if she thinks MIL did more or got more..my MIL is my one of best friends and lives 5 minutes from us, my mom lives an hour and we aren't that close..oh well..I would just tell MIL that you don't want to find out the sex and make sure you tell the u/s tech not to point out anything that will point to the sex and hope for the best..i would also make dh tell her how important it is that you guys don't find out early..GL
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  • Jessee28Jessee28 member
    No one knows and I would like to keep it that way. They said the ultrasound was to check growth.

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  • hterry85hterry85 member
    I had a growth u/s last week, and she didn't mention anything about the gender of even look until DH asked if she was still a girl. Prior to that she was just taking measurments and explaining what she was measuing and why. Each tech is different, but if she knows you don't want to know, I doubt she'll make a big deal out of it.
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  • CKLee1107CKLee1107
    You don't need to go in before MIL to tell the tech if no one knows.  Have DH remind here that you two want it to be a surprise and that this is important to both of you.  Then when you get there, before the tech begins, let him/her know that you do not want to find out the sex and they will be more than able to keep you guys from figuring out when/if they measure something in that area.  GL
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  • Jessee28Jessee28 member
    Thanks everyone for easing my nerves. I just get worked up sometimes over things involving her. I try not to but she has a bad habit of butting in that puts me on the edge.

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  • Big JBig J member

    Tell the tech beforehand that you don't want to know.  Unless they're looking for something in particular, they probably wont even go for the between the legs shot and if they do you probably wont even notice. 

    At least your MIL is involved.  Mine thinks I'm torturing my kid everytime I get an u/s.

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  • Battlebaby09Battlebaby09
    Yeah my grandparents came to our 27 week ultrasound. But I understand! My MIL is awful when it comes to just about anything. DH and I got into a fight, because I wanted my mom in the delivery room and not his. (Regardless, that is the way it will be!) But I am also comfortable leaving our LO with my mother and I am not with his. I am finally getting a little more comfortable with my grandmother. It is ok to be stressed just try to deal with it as best as possible and then remember you are in charge! I forgot that somewhere along the way. And a fellow Bumpie gave me a swift kick of a reminder. Good Luck Hun!
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