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Inlaw Christmas Visit...WWYD?

daniellems2003daniellems2003
in Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

So my inlaws are coming down from December 21st-28th, a whole week stay. Meaning they will be staying over Christmas Eve, that I am totally NOT big on the idea. Also, that my mother in law mentioned they will coming down EVERY year (they live 6 hours away). So I'm afraid if we let them stay this year, they will think they are staying here every year.

I am ridiculously morning sick, throwing up every single morning, nausea all day and I am basically not in the mood to host our house for an entire week, besides the fact that I really can't stand MIL. When she comes, she takes over my whole house. Also makes it uncomfortable position, that we don't allow her to babysit DD. So if I had to go out for any reason, it would be weird for me to drop her over for my mom to watch her.

Question is- Would you suck if up for a week? Or tell them its too much for us right now??

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Re: Inlaw Christmas Visit...WWYD?

  • vanillacouragevanillacourage member

    I would tell them you can't wait to see them, and include a short list of hotel options for their stay. 

    You're right, whatever you do this year could well set precedent.  Be sure you & your DH are on the same page on this though.

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  • mama_kmama_k
    I would say so sorry, but we are not up for visitors this year-----or see if they can just come for a long weekend after Christmas. Mine also live 6 hours away, and we actually get along fairly well, but a week long stay while pregnant would be too much for me.
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  • BlessedMommy723BlessedMommy723 member

    How does your DH feel? Is he excited that his parents are coming down for the week and staying with you guys? If so, then I would honestly suck it up. His parents live far away and he probably doesn't get to see them very often. Let him have his time with his parents.

     

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  • Brookie-CookieBrookie-Cookie
    Not flaming, why don't you let your MIL babysit?
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  • emiliemadisonemiliemadison member

    What does your husband say? Does he feel the same way you do, or is he totally ok with having them stay at your house? That's the first thing to figure out.

    Assuming you're on the same page with DH and neither of you *really* want them staying at your house for a week, then HE needs to call and say, "Hey, we are so excited to see you for Christmas!! Which hotel will you be staying at, or do you need help finding one? I'd be happy to look around for you."

    If they balk, your DH needs to explain that the two of you are just not in a position to host at this time but you're glad they'll be in town. And that's that. They cant stay with you unless you let them.

    As for future years, same rule applies. Unless you allow them to stay, their only other option is a hotel or stay home. 

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  • IckyThumpIckyThump
    I would tell them not this year and talk to DH about next year after DC #2 is here. I love my IL's (most of the time), but I can't imagine having them in my house for a week. Ugh.
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  • daniellems2003daniellems2003

    MIL is a recovering alcoholic with many relapses including drinking while watching my niece.

    Also, the last time we gave her a chance to babysit. I came home to her cooking in the kitchen and DD playing with all our fireplace "tools" and firewood...............That did it for me and DH!

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  • daniellems2003daniellems2003
    DH is on the fence, I know he doesn't want to hurt their feelings but he doesn't want them here either. Also understands with how sick I am that I don't need them here 24/7 while he is at work all day.
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  • JAC1027JAC1027
    That sounds awful.  I like my in-laws but I could not take them for more than 3 days/2 nights at their house or mine.  Can they maybe abbreviate their trip, esp if your DH is going to be working while they're visiting.  Did they just invite themselves without consulting you?  That's a little pushy and wouldn't fly with me.  
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  • brandonsfuturewife07brandonsfuturewife07 member
    just tell her the truth (or have DH do so)--you aren't up for hosting visitors, here is a list of hotels close to your house.
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