NTR: Odd Angel Tree requests

armywife7205 · December 2009

So DH and I always get a couple children off an Angel tree every year. We usually select them from a tree on the Army base where we were stationed. This year we decided to get one from the YMCA we attend because they had sooooo many!

Yesterday we went to pick one and I was completely floored by the requests on the tree. I think since we waited a little bit (the tree has been up since Thanksgiving) other people were shocked too.

In the past I have gotten general ideas, Example: Boy Age 5, Shoe size 6 clothing M/ 5/6, trucks, GI Joe. Normal to me...

This year there were mostly older kids and the items were like 'pink iPod', webcam (for a 16 year old girl!!!), specific brand name shoes (Nike Air force ones), PS3 Games... I was floored.

First, at how very specific they were, second, at how expensive most of the items were and finally at the 16 year old requesting a webcam! I am going to give her the benefit of the doubt and say her dad/mom is deployed but seriously! I know these are things that a 16 year old would want want but as a parent if we were in need I would not allow DD to write these things.

We ended up picking a 14 year old boy who wanted legos.

Is this normal in your area? I am wondering if this is standard here. We just moved over the summer? Thought? I love adopting a family but this made me kind of sad .

bieanca · December 2009

I have seen that pretty much as the norm with the teenagers. They want what the other teenagers have so they can fit in.

soon2Bmrspower · December 2009

Wow! I would have had the same reaction as you and probably adopted a family/child through another organization. Every time we have adopted a family, the needs have been basic needs with a few toys thrown on the list for the kids, but nothing that expensive or specific.

mrse1107 · December 2009

in general, kids want all the tech stuff.

games, computer gadets, ipods, so - no it doesn't surprise me.

However, like you said, as a family in need, you would have thought they'd go for more "practical" stuff -but perhaps, they were hoping for a "fun gift" since they are in need.

libby73 · December 2009

At my old job we would help out interact which was a place that housed women that left abusive relationships who had nothing but the clothes on their backs. Most times you would see they were asking for the basics, but some of the kids did ask an Xbox, bike, gameboy, etc.

armywife7205 · December 2009

Oh I agree that kids want typical teen stuff and there were some who asked for an MP3 player which you can find for a more reasonable amount. I feel bad because I dont think someone will likely take them off the tree because an iPod is pretty expensive. There were like 10 + kids asking for them.

southernbelle82 · December 2009

I've seen some like this. I think so many kids here are greedy and selfish. If you're really in need, you're not asking for an ipod. If you need shoes, you're happy that you're given shoes that fit...not asking for a specific brand. Contentment and graciousness are qualities lost on many many people.

Mrs.DMC · December 2009

I would think that is the norm for teenagers. Like the PP said, they want to fit in. Shopping for a teenager can be pretty expensive. That is an awkward age rage and I dread the day we will be shopping for our 16 year old...ugh!

Ciconrad · December 2009

I saw a lot of 10-12 year olds that had bikes on their Angel Tree list. I feel bad because I am sure every kid that age would love to have a bike like all the other kids, but it's a totally impractical thing to put on the list. They are expensive and you have to drop off all the gifts back at the grocery store or mall or whatever, which isn't easy to do with a bike.

When I was working we always did an Adopt a Family from Dept Social Services. We woud buy gifts for the entire family. Usually the parents would have basic things on there like pots and pans or a new coat or something like that. However, some times the parents made annoying requests....like the Dad who asked for very specific video games or the Mom who wanted an $80 perfume. I just can't imagine being in need with 4 kids and expecting someone to spend that kind of money for those types of gifts for an adult. Wouldn't you want your kids to get every dime of their donation besides something you desperately needed?

soon2Bmrspower · December 2009

Ciconrad:

However, some times the parents made annoying requests....like the Dad who asked for very specific video games or the Mom who wanted an $80 perfume.

Wow Indifferent ... this blows my mind.

skoorbnibor · December 2009

southernbelle82:
I've seen some like this. I think so many kids here are greedy and selfish. If you're really in need, you're not asking for an ipod. If you need shoes, you're happy that you're given shoes that fit...not asking for a specific brand. Contentment and graciousness are qualities lost on many many people.

Very true, but i dont think the kids get that... to a teen or even a preteen, it IS a basic need to fit in and have the same stuff as the other kids, and maybe this is a regional thing, but I do the salvation army tree, and they cover basics and the tags on the tree are for a 'special' gift. I mean, an Ipod is a bit too expensive, but I can't blame a kid for asking!

mattslady · December 2009

southernbelle82:
I've seen some like this. I think so many kids here are greedy and selfish. If you're really in need, you're not asking for an ipod. If you need shoes, you're happy that you're given shoes that fit...not asking for a specific brand. Contentment and graciousness are qualities lost on many many people.

While you probably mean well, I have to say, this attitude really gets under my skin. So, because their parents are on the less fortunate end of the financial spectrum they should not want what every other American teen would want for Christmas? They should not be selfish and ask for socks and soap? They're kids. Its Christmas. And most likely someone asked them, "What would you like for Christmas?" and they answered it honestly. To have somebody like you call them greedy and selfish makes me so sad for them.

Momma.Brown · December 2009

mattslady:
southernbelle82:
I've seen some like this. I think so many kids here are greedy and selfish. If you're really in need, you're not asking for an ipod. If you need shoes, you're happy that you're given shoes that fit...not asking for a specific brand. Contentment and graciousness are qualities lost on many many people.

While you probably mean well, I have to say, this attitude really gets under my skin. So, because their parents are on the less fortunate end of the financial spectrum they should not want what every other American teen would want for Christmas? They should not be selfish and ask for socks and soap? They're kids. Its Christmas. And most likely someone asked them, "What would you like for Christmas?" and they answered it honestly. To have somebody like you call them greedy and selfish makes me so sad for them.

i have to agree with this.

my family has been poor and we have been comfortable. having been on both ends, i think its okay to want and its okay to ask for stuff. in general i think teens dont have a concept of what things actually cost. and really, whats wrong with hoping that somebody might fulfill your wish? isnt that part of the magic of christmas?

but ya know, you have to aim high and hope you meet somewhere in the middle. maybe the giver wont get the $300 ipod but instead get a $50 mp3 player and i bet that kid would be just as happy.

i completely agree that they should be grateful for whatever is given to them. i would definitely be disappointed to see them turn their nose up at a similar gift of a lesser value. but i think that your expectations of a child's thinking is way too high.

LoriFalce · December 2009

The older kids normally have higher-ticket items. I've bought when I could. Last year we got a kid an MP3 player and an Itunes gift card. It wasn't an Ipod, and he didn't request one specifically.

I don't begrudge them their wish lists. You're talking about kids who hear "no, we can't afford it" about almost everything.

LoriFalce · December 2009

Momma.Brown:
mattslady:

southernbelle82:
I've seen some like this. I think so many kids here are greedy and selfish. If you're really in need, you're not asking for an ipod. If you need shoes, you're happy that you're given shoes that fit...not asking for a specific brand. Contentment and graciousness are qualities lost on many many people.

While you probably mean well, I have to say, this attitude really gets under my skin. So, because their parents are on the less fortunate end of the financial spectrum they should not want what every other American teen would want for Christmas? They should not be selfish and ask for socks and soap? They're kids. Its Christmas. And most likely someone asked them, "What would you like for Christmas?" and they answered it honestly. To have somebody like you call them greedy and selfish makes me so sad for them.

i have to agree with this.

my family has been poor and we have been comfortable. having been on both ends, i think its okay to want and its okay to ask for stuff. in general i think teens dont have a concept of what things actually cost. and really, whats wrong with hoping that somebody might fulfill your wish? isnt that part of the magic of christmas?

but ya know, you have to aim high and hope you meet somewhere in the middle. maybe the giver wont get the $300 ipod but instead get a $50 mp3 player and i bet that kid would be just as happy.

i completely agree that they should be grateful for whatever is given to them. i would definitely be disappointed to see them turn their nose up at a similar gift of a lesser value. but i think that your expectations of a child's thinking is way too high.

And you can get a pink Ipod shuffle for $59. More than some might plan on spending, but not necessarily an uberexpensive Touch.

Jessibell · December 2009

I have zero problem with specific requests. I take the ones off the tree that I can afford. My child wants for nothing and I think it is the least I can do to give back a little bit to a child that has very little. And who the hell wants socks for Christmas?

eileen32 · December 2009

I was a School Counselor before I SAH with DD. We had a lot of low income families at my school and part of my job was coordinating holiday help for our needy families. I had people in the community, businesses, banks, etc. sponsor families, just like an Angel Tree. I was amazed each year at some of the requests, by the parents because they filled out the cards for their children, and often it was the same families each year with outrageous requests. PS3, computer, really exspensive requests. I always told these families that this was holiday "help" and mostly focused on clothing needs and a few special toy requests. SOme people live that way for so long they just hae no sense of how tacky it is to request things like that. What is sad is that mentality is passed on to their children. They are raised in a home where they expect to be given things because they saw mom and dad didn't work, lived in a trailer and received free food, clothes, etc. Along with that we had so many hard working parents who couldn't make ends meet and were so grateful for the help. So for each family like that there were many more who were the oppposite.

femmeftle9 · December 2009

I have to agree with PPs. Just because a child is "less fortunate" doesn't mean they don't deserve nice toys/gadgets, fun gifts during the holidays. They just want to fit in and experience some of the same things their peers are.

If I can swing it, I think I'll pick up an iPod Shuffle and donate it to Toys for Tots. Every year, they always say that the older kids items are most needed. But I would probably drop it off at a more secure place, like the police/fire dept.

We adopt a family at my office every year, so I've been buying for that.

The holidays always depress me for this reason

Tess12 · December 2009

southernbelle82:
I've seen some like this. I think so many kids here are greedy and selfish. If you're really in need, you're not asking for an ipod. If you need shoes, you're happy that you're given shoes that fit...not asking for a specific brand. Contentment and graciousness are qualities lost on many many people.

She's a kid. Not having an Ipod when all her friends have one probably feels like a need to her. Just because her family doesn't have a lot of money, she's not supposed to want things?

Have a heart, guys. It's Christmas.

This whole post makes me want to go out and buy that girl the damn pink ipod.

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