So how does ur DH act?

Temp356619000002780 · December 2009

About TTC? Does he act indifferent? Is he supportive? Or is he devastated about BFN's?

I'm just curious...

My DH is normally supportive and takes me out to eat Sushi with Martinis or Tappas (beef carpaccio yum) with white sangrias when I get a BFN! He really tries to make sure I am happy and smilling! I tend to forget all about the BFN. I mean it does come back, but at least at that momment I do forget! DH has been down lately when we get a BFN! He also is shocked that we are doing clomid!

Ellermarie · December 2009

We haven't been trying long so he is sort of indifferent. My husband is the world's most patient man so I don't see him getting upset at any future BFNs. He just thinks it will happen when it happens and there is no need to worry about it.

hainesherway · December 2009

He was always very patient and optimistic, but now that we're going to see an RE, that is starting to get us down a bit. He revealed to me last night that he's afraid I will leave him if we can't get pg. I told him that never crossed my mind, and we'll do what we have to do to become parents.

Scout05 · December 2009

Mine was devoted to the process when needed (if you know what I mean), before our first pregnancy.

After the second loss, he became obsessed with taking vitamins and drinking POM juice and all of that.

I am actually not sure how it is going to go once we really start trying again - if he'll be even more obssessed and invovled, or if he'll go back to just being relaxed about the whole thing. Clearly, the vitamins/juice didn't matter, so I hope he can just take it easy.

I am enough of a TTC freak, no need to drag him into the mess.

future_mrs.lambdin · December 2009

LindsRockies:

I wouldn't say mine is indifferent, but he doesn't ask about it and I keep him in the dark about a lot of things. He makes an effort to listen to me vent and be supportive but I know he doesn't want to hear about EWCM and the phases of the menstrual cycle.

This. Although sometimes I'll be doing something on FF and he'll ask what "that" is and what "this" means.

5de5 · December 2009

My DH is very supportive. He gets excited at the possibility of a BFP but isn't that upset when it's a BFN. He's generally supportive of my efforts to chart etc, and excited about starting clomid the next cycle (assuming we don't get a BFP when I test tomorrow), but at the same time he doesn't want to know anything about any fertile signs, or when I'm ovulating.

Temp356619000002780 · December 2009

LindsRockies:

I wouldn't say mine is indifferent, but he doesn't ask about it and I keep him in the dark about a lot of things. He makes an effort to listen to me vent and be supportive but I know he doesn't want to hear about EWCM and the phases of the menstrual cycle.

I never tell DH any of that. The only thing he ever notices is when I buy OPK's and when I buy tampons! LOL but never knows anything else. Then he asks info!

MissNikki007 · December 2009

He's not indifferent per se, I just don't think he knows how to support me through this. He will ask me about my CM and when I am O'ing though. LOL

DaniLovesPink · December 2009

I acutally asked DH for the first time last night if he gets disappointed. He said, "It's hard to say...I want another child, so in one way, yes; but, I don't get disappointed in you." I thought it was really sweet. He has gone out of his way during this whole ordeal to make sure I know that he still loves me and wouldn't have things any other way, baby or not.

Temp356619000002780 · December 2009

hainesherway:
He was always very patient and optimistic, but now that we're going to see an RE, that is starting to get us down a bit. He revealed to me last night that he's afraid I will leave him if we can't get pg. I told him that never crossed my mind, and we'll do what we have to do to become parents.

Oh ur poor DH! Funny how they start thinking like that. I always reassure DH that I am happy regardless. I think mine was worried that I would want to leave if his SA came back bad! But I have to remind him that we are happy..

Temp356619000002780 · December 2009

MissNikki007:
He's not indifferent per se, I just don't think he knows how to support me through this. He will ask me about my CM and when I am O'ing though. LOL

At least he shows he's their! aww

chickpea912 · December 2009

My DH is pretty supportive, in his own way. Every morning he asks about my temp - all he really knows is that after O, it should be high. He's cute - he doesn't REALLY know what he's talking about, but he's not too far off. He's a big stickler for not POAS early, and he's gotten really strict about that - it's good for me though. He's also very patient - he thinks it will happen when it happens, although he was bummed last month with the BFN... we both thought it was happening for us...

renafaith · December 2009

He's not really indifferent, but I think it makes him feel helpless, so he doesn't like to talk about it. Anytime I bring up anything to do with a baby, he won't discuss it and says "Let's get you pregnant first"

MaybeBaby2 · December 2009

We haven't been TTC very long (been letting things "happen" since June or July and this is our 2nd cycle really trying). He's indifferent, I guess. He knows I temp and all that, but that's the extent. He doesn't know peak times or anything. Although he's been getting an ear full of my frustration about all my on-going spotting issues this cycle.

Lina1123 · December 2009

Since I am suffering with secondary IF it is another separate set of emotions IMO. DH feels like, "it will happen" since #1 was easy to conceive. But DH is a really nonchalant type of guy. He is supportive and just recently became upset over BFN's.

HRMJPC · December 2009

I'd say that he is way involved. We were practicing NFP prior to TTC, so he knows a ton about my menstrual cycle. However, now that we're TTC, he initiates all of the sex pre-O, and he obsesses over my DPO temps. He actually wakes up every morning with me and asks me what the temp is. He's also getting on me to try to quit coffee... so I may be considering that soon.

Temp356619000002780 · December 2009

Lina1123:
Since I am suffering with secondary IF it is another separate set of emotions IMO. DH feels like, "it will happen" since #1 was easy to conceive. But DH is a really nonchalant type of guy. He is supportive and just recently became upset over BFN's.

Mine is also a Secondary IF so he also acts like it should happen real soon. But who knows!

cassiedianne · December 2009

At first, he didn't ask questions or anything, but now he's getting excited because one of his best friends just had a son and he's now more anxious for us to get pregnant so ours will have a playmate around his age. He'll ask things like how long until you ovulate etc.

Arielle27 · December 2009

LindsRockies:
I wouldn't say mine is indifferent, but he doesn't ask about it and I keep him in the dark about a lot of things. He makes an effort to listen to me vent and be supportive but I know he doesn't want to hear about EWCM and the phases of the menstrual cycle.

Ditto.

AJflowers · December 2009

TTC for us was a two-person effort...he was devastated by the BFNs after the 1st few cycles, but he hid it well. I had to ask how he was handling the upsets. My H was super supportive.

mulanuva · December 2009

Ellermarie:
We haven't been trying long so he is sort of indifferent. My husband is the world's most patient man so I don't see him getting upset at any future BFNs. He just thinks it will happen when it happens and there is no need to worry about it.

Ditto

LilacStar11 · December 2009

He tries to understand. He asks me about my temps and what they mean in the morning. I tell him my phantom symptoms and not to get his hopes up. He said that if I get AF this cycle, he would buy me a facial. Loovee him.

k-mart · December 2009

My dh is very supportive and will pretty much monitor my cycles. He is ready to have sex when I tell him. He gets disapointed when I get my period. But he is not very supportive of the temping - he cringes at the beeping since I wake up a good two hours before him - but he tolerates it.

Now with the RE - he is very much the one who wants to go full force with treatments and be more aggressive than I might be ready to.

BUT - The best part is - he is so optimistic about us becoming parents. He doesn't care about the path that we have to take to reach that goal. He just knows that it WILL happen - one day.

Temp356619000002780 · December 2009

kdodge423:

It bothers him more than he lets on. He doesn't want to let it out because he doesn't feel I need that added on top of everything.

Aww that is sweet!

Temp356619000002780 · December 2009

k-mart:

My dh is very supportive and will pretty much monitor my cycles. He is ready to have sex when I tell him. He gets disapointed when I get my period. But he is not very supportive of the temping - he cringes at the beeping since I wake up a good two hours before him - but he tolerates it.

Now with the RE - he is very much the one who wants to go full force with treatments and be more aggressive than I might be ready to.

BUT - The best part is - he is so optimistic about us becoming parents. He doesn't care about the path that we have to take to reach that goal. He just knows that it WILL happen - one day.

That is great. DH hates the beeps on my BBT on the weekends! Other than that it's all the same to him! LOL

sillypit · December 2009

Mine's super sweet about the whole thing, he asks me about my temps every day, although mostly I think it's because he wants to have more days of getting sex every day

.

Arielle27 · December 2009

Wow, a lot of your DHs are so involved!

I got upset with mine last cycle when I got AF - he asked if I was upset, and I said "yes, of course, aren't you?" and he shrugged. I asked him what that means, and he said that it means he doesn't want to see me upset, but that he isn't upset. I asked him why not, and he said because he wants a baby, not a baby NOW.

LadyXaverian · December 2009

LindsRockies:
I wouldn't say mine is indifferent, but he doesn't ask about it and I keep him in the dark about a lot of things. He makes an effort to listen to me vent and be supportive but I know he doesn't want to hear about EWCM and the phases of the menstrual cycle.

This about sums it up. We're in our first cycle, so I've not yet seen how he might respond to a BFN. I did tell him today that I got my CH on FF, and I explained how good our timing was. He responded with, "You're welcome." LOL!!

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