TTC After a Loss

Question?? Maybe tmi---? about a loss....

My background-----VERY VERY few cycles past 30 days.

I can pretty much recall the 4-5 times that they were bc of the panic of being ku (this was while I was in college and pre-marriage).

Now that I've had a loss----it's sort of hung over my head that this one situation previously, that I had, may have also been a loss, maybe?

I was like 2 wks late. I was in my last semester of college, working full time, and married. Dh and I had went off bc pills bc we knew we were planning to ttc shortly after my graduation. Our method of prevention was basically just using an O calculator, watching for my cm change and just avoiding the 10 days surrounding my "calculated" O prediction. (Considering I had perfect 30 dc, I knew I usually O'd around cd 14-17.......fyi, we were also okay if I did get ku at this point, so we weren't overly concerned w/avoiding or "precautions").........Anyway.....I significantly remember it bc I was late and debating on taking a hpt and I didn't. I didn't bc I just sort of pushed it off to assuming it was from extreme stress and sheer exhaustion. (I was working 40 hrs a week, driving 1.5 hrs to class weekly, and completing my student teaching. I was basically working from 6am to 10pm non-stop). I was working at a retail store and was working w/a customer when I had such severe cramps that I nearly passed out. I rushed to the bathroom and passed the worst clots of my life. I also passed a fairly large grape-like tissue. I can still clearly recall what it looked like. I was shocked. I had never seen something like that. The only person I really told about it was dh and my SIL. (Who we all know is NOT a very reliable or consoling person.)

I'm thinking that maybe I was pregnant and lost that pregnancy as well. Should I mention this to my ob at my next appt? Would they consider it another loss or just brush it off ?
It's something that's just sort of been bugging me for awhile now......

What r ur opinions?

Re: Question?? Maybe tmi---? about a loss....

  • I would mention it, but be prepared that the doc is probably not going to care much about it, in terms of your overall loss history. There is no way to know what happened, and they really don't seem to "count" chemical pregnancies anyway.

    Which we all know is wrong and hurtful, but in terms of how your doc will react to this - I think they'll just say "maybe, maybe not" and probably won't consider it much beyond that.

    JMO - it does sound like a CP. Obviously, I can't know that for sure or anything, but it sounds so similar to how mine went.

    Either way, I'm sorry you have to have this on your mind.

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  • I would def mention that. If they consider that a loss too it might help you move along for whatever testing you can get. That def doesn't sound normal. Sorry you have to have that memory.
    BFP #1- 1/16/09- Baby Ava stillborn at 32 weeks, possible cord accident, 7/30/09
    BFP #2- 1/5/10- Baby Jack born at 37w2d, 6lbs 13 oz, 8/24/10
    BFP #3- 7/30/11- Baby Boy Due April 3, 2012
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  • I would definitely mention to the doctor.  Obviously there is now way to know now, but it should be noted.  I think something similar happened to me last year.  I was 6 days late and was positive that I was pregnant so I took a test that was BFN.  I don't remember why I waited to test now, but  I was shocked it was negative.  Sure enough I got my period that afternoon and it was much heavier and crampier than normal.  I didn't think that much of it and then got pregnant the following month.  I told my doctor about it after the D&C and he said it could have been a c/p or early loss.  I really wish I knew now if it was.  Although the thought of 3 confirmed losses would really depress me.
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  • I'm so sorry sweetie but that kinda does sound like an early MC. I'd certainly mention it to the doctor.
  • It sounds to me like you were pregnant.  If you were two weeks late then you'd have been six weeks pregnant.  Is that counted as a CP?  I don't know what the cut off for a CP is.  Frankly, I'd tell my Dr. that it was a confirmed loss.  But that's just because I'm not able to get any testing until I've had multiple losses.  And I'm willing to lie if it will save my next baby.  I'm not willing to sacrifice more children so that the insurance agencies' standards can be met.
  • They might not count it as a loss only because they don't have anything to back it up with other than the recollection of events.  It might be something to let your doc know about, but, unfortunately, I doubt he or she will count it as a loss.
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  • Thanks girls. I always kinda felt like it was a loss, but since I didn't take an hpt, I always sort of pushed it aside. It's just been looming in my mind a lot lately. 
  • imageheathergirl67:
    It sounds to me like you were pregnant.  If you were two weeks late then you'd have been six weeks pregnant.  Is that counted as a CP?  I don't know what the cut off for a CP is.  Frankly, I'd tell my Dr. that it was a confirmed loss.  But that's just because I'm not able to get any testing until I've had multiple losses.  And I'm willing to lie if it will save my next baby.  I'm not willing to sacrifice more children so that the insurance agencies' standards can be met.

    6 Weeks is generally when the pregnancy is considered a "clinical" pregnancy rather than a "chemical" pregnancy.

    At least, that is what I was told.

  • I would definitely mention it.  It is always good to have a professional opinion and let them help make choices based on all of the information available.  GL
  • imageambrandau2:

    imageheathergirl67:
    It sounds to me like you were pregnant.  If you were two weeks late then you'd have been six weeks pregnant.  Is that counted as a CP?  I don't know what the cut off for a CP is.  Frankly, I'd tell my Dr. that it was a confirmed loss.  But that's just because I'm not able to get any testing until I've had multiple losses.  And I'm willing to lie if it will save my next baby.  I'm not willing to sacrifice more children so that the insurance agencies' standards can be met.

    6 Weeks is generally when the pregnancy is considered a "clinical" pregnancy rather than a "chemical" pregnancy.

    At least, that is what I was told.

    I agree with you both.  I don't think you would typically have clots and passed tissue with a cp. 

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  • imagerjl07:
    imageambrandau2:

    imageheathergirl67:
    It sounds to me like you were pregnant.  If you were two weeks late then you'd have been six weeks pregnant.  Is that counted as a CP?  I don't know what the cut off for a CP is.  Frankly, I'd tell my Dr. that it was a confirmed loss.  But that's just because I'm not able to get any testing until I've had multiple losses.  And I'm willing to lie if it will save my next baby.  I'm not willing to sacrifice more children so that the insurance agencies' standards can be met.

    6 Weeks is generally when the pregnancy is considered a "clinical" pregnancy rather than a "chemical" pregnancy.

    At least, that is what I was told.

    I agree with you both.  I don't think you would typically have clots and passed tissue with a cp. 

    Shockingly, I did pass some large clots and a small, tiny sac of tissue during my CP. It was incredibly awful, and was one of the reasons I was quick to demand a D&C when we realized we were going to lose Pumpkin. If I saw all that at 4 weeks, I couldn't stand the idea of what I would see at 8+ weeks.

  • Ambrandau - I'm sorry you had to deal with that.  For mine that was unconfirmed, it was definitely heavier, but I don't think I had any of that.  For my actual cp, I think my period was actually slightly lighter than normal.  I guess there is no "typical" with these things.
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